Stop stalling, Taylor.
Liam stops abruptly, and I almost crash into the back of him.
That’s when I see that we’re standing in front of a roller coaster ride.
“No one eats before a roller coaster unless they intend on puking. So, it’s decision time, Boston. We either ditch the roller coaster and go get food—even though I know you’re not hungry because we only ate an hour ago and that you’re just stalling before making another excuse, and then we’ll never end up riding this roller coaster because you’ll let your fear talk you out of it—or you can pull your big-girl knickers on and ride the fuck out of this roller coaster.”
“Big-girl knickers? Seriously, Hunter? That might be the unsexiest thing I’ve ever heard.”
He tilts his head to the side. “Seriously? Because I think you’d look hot in big knickers.”
“Really?” I blink, trying to picture that.
Nope, not working for me at all.
“Really.” He gives me a sexy smile. The look in his eyes is like he’s actually imagining me in them right now.
And, now, I’m thinking about where I can find a store in London that sells big knickers.
“But we’re saving big knickers for later,” he says.
“We are?”
“Quit stalling, Boston.” He gives me a look.
He’s right. I’m totally stalling. Again.
“Now, are we riding the fuck out of this roller coaster or not?”
I take a breath and blow it out. “We’re riding the fuck out of it.”
A smile lifts his gorgeous lips. “Good girl. And, just so you know, I intend to ride the fuck out of you later tonight.”
Sweet baby Jesus. He’s so fucking hot.
Liam gives me a quick firm kiss on the lips and grabs my hand, and then I’m moving again.
He brings us to a stop at the ticket booth. “Two tickets, please,” he tells the woman sitting in the booth.
“Twenty pounds,” she tells him.
Liam hands her a bill, and she passes him two tickets. He grabs my hand again, and we move up the walkway to the ride together.
We’ve come at the right time, as the roller coaster has just finished unloading the last lot of passengers and is starting to fill up with new ones.
So, at least I won’t be waiting around.
Even still, my heart is beating like a bitch in my chest, and I’m shitting my pants.
I know. I have a tumor literally growing in my brain, killing me—and I’m letting it…I’m doing nothing to try to stop it—but I’m afraid of a stupid roller coaster.
Doesn’t make sense, does it? But then fear isn’t exactly rational. It doesn’t let us pick and choose. It just is.
And dying to me isn’t the thing I’m afraid of. Not since I lost my family anyway.
It’s living that scares me.
Living without them—that’s what terrifies me.
Dying and being with them—that will be a welcome relief.
I stare up at the roller coaster, which looks a hell of a lot bigger and higher than it did the first time I looked up at it. It must be at least a couple of hundred feet at its highest point.
“Do you think it looks safe to you?” I whisper to Liam as we’re in line to get on.
“It’s safe.” He squeezes my hand.
If I don’t care about dying, then why do I care if this ride looks safe enough?
Because I don’t want anything to happen to Liam.
And fear, like I said, is not rational.
But it is a state of mind.
I squeeze my eyes shut and force the stupid fear out of my thoughts.
Liam tugs on my hand, and I see the ride attendant waiting to let us on the ride.
“You sure you want to do this?” Liam leans his head close to mine, his voice just above a whisper.
I stare back at him and force a loose smile onto my lips. “I’m sure. Just…don’t let go of my hand, okay?”
His eyes move down to my hand that he’s holding, as if he’s just realizing he’s still holding it. Then, he looks back to my face. “I won’t let go, Boston. I promise.” Then, he leads me onto the ride.
What is it about someone holding your hand that makes you feel safe?
It’s not that they can save you or change things or make a difference by holding your hand.
But, somehow, someone just holding on to you in that small way can make the scariest things seem a little easier.
Because you know that, no matter what, they have you, and they’re not letting go.
And, right now, Liam has me, and he’s not letting go.
The ride attendant secures us in our seats with the harness, and then the metal barrier comes down over us.
Liam squeezes my hand that he’s still holding. “You doing okay there, Boston?”
I move my eyes to his and off the roller coaster that I’ve been examining to make sure it’s fixed together properly—like I would actually know.
“Mmhmm.”
“There’s nothing to be worried about.”
“Mmhmm.”
He chuckles. “Do something for me. Think about when we get to the top of the ride.”