He couldn’t be so verbose. When her tight, slick heat pulsed around him, he lost all ability to think, let alone form coherent words. He was animal in that moment, lost in the sensations of pleasure that ordered him to take. To claim. To make his in the most permanent way he could imagine.
He thrust, short and hard, and her fingers tightened against his back. He watched her face as he took her. Her mouth parted with pleasure, her eyes fluttered shut. He memorized every twitch and moan, guiding his motions through her reactions. He watched her build to orgasm and he loved every moment of that journey as they slowly took it together.
At last her eyes flew open and went wide. She let out a garbled cry and her sheath began to pulse around him, milking him with her pleasure, demanding he merge it with his own. And he did, thrusting harder through her crisis, reveling in the way his balls tightened. Electric sensation shot through him. He slammed his mouth to hers, letting his cries of pleasure be lost against her lips as he pumped hard and hot into her clenching body.
He collapsed against her, pressing kisses to her neck as she smoothed her hands over his back. She was his. Truly his in a way he hadn’t allowed before. A way that ensured there would be no going back, not that he wanted to do so.
Because she was the love of his life, and he couldn’t wait to tell the world.
“That was wonderful,” she murmured, pressing her mouth to his neck. “Every time is wonderful. I never imagined it could be like that.”
He rolled a little, balancing precariously on the edge of the settee so he could face her. Their bodies parted with the motion, and she let out a little sigh of displeasure that made him smile. “Just think of how wonderful it will be when we aren’t sneaking around. Or fraught with danger and potential loss.”
She slid her fingers into his hair, massaging his scalp gently. “I might miss fraught with danger,” she said with a laugh.
He arched a brow. “Noted, Miss Monroe. I can certainly make sure there is a little after we’re married. I’ll make love to you by lakes and in side rooms at parties if the fear of being caught makes you mewl my name so prettily.”
Dark pink color filled her cheeks. But there was also a little interest in her eyes at the idea, and he chuckled. He would definitely file this information away.
“Now, I would very much like to exploit the potential danger the study puts us in. However…” He sat up and drew her up with him. They shifted around, putting clothes back in place. She laughed as she smoothed down his hair and he tucked her errant curls back into place. Soon they both looked somewhat more reasonable.
“We have one unpleasantness we must face, I’m afraid,” he said at last.
Her expression twisted and she snuggled a little closer to him. “My uncle.”
He nodded. “Your uncle. I want you to understand I’m not going to ask him for your hand. I’m telling him I’m taking it. It’s a courtesy he isn’t owed.”
Her lips pursed and he could see all her anxiety return. How he hated it. He hoped someday she would no longer feel any of it.
“When you do this,” she said, her voice shaky, “just be prepared. He is entirely awful, especially when crossed. He may not be able to threaten you with a return to Boston as he did me, but he’ll do anything in his power to make this as terrible as he can.”
Baldwin jolted. “He threatened to send you to America?”
She nodded slowly. “A promise, really, more than a threat.”
The rage he’d felt before, when he’d come upon Peter Shephard berating her in the parlor, lifted again. Only this time he had more tools to protect her.
“I will never let him hurt you again,” he said softly.
She smiled, and it lit up his world in endless color. In that moment, he realized this was how his life would be from now on. The difficulties made easier by this woman’s enormous heart, by the light she carried with her so effortlessly.
He leaned in to kiss her and then stood, drawing her with him. “Come, let’s get this over with, and then we can do nothing but celebrate.”
He could see her lingering hesitation, but she nodded nonetheless and allowed him to lead her to the door.
Chapter Twenty-One
Helena wasn’t certain how it was possible to feel so happy and so terrified all at once. But it was. Inside she was a riot of emotion, such that she could scarcely breathe. She knew how badly this announcement to her family could go. There were a hundred terrible outcomes and so few positive ones, at least in this conversation.
But above all the fear, all the anticipation about how bad it could be, was something else. When she turned to look at Baldwin in this quiet moment they were sharing before Uncle Peter and Charity arrived in the parlor, her heart swelled with joy and happiness she’d never believed she’d experience again.
Baldwin loved her. That had felt like an impossibility since the first moment she met him and he made her heart skip a beat. She hadn’t let herself hope for more than whatever stolen time they were allowed. Resigning herself to the fact that she couldn’t have anything beyond that had been her only way to survive when her love for this man grew with each passing day.
And now…he was hers. He looked at her and she saw in his eyes that the fantasy, the fairytale, was true. And she knew that they could be happy together for the rest of their lives.
He slid his fingers through hers, lacing them together as he lifted her hand to kiss it. “I will always protect you, Helena.”
It was a powerful statement, made even more so by the years she’d spent having only herself to depend upon. She nodded slowly. “I believe you, Your Grace.”
He smiled as the door opened and her uncle and her cousin entered. All her good feelings fled, and she immediately went on alert. Out of habit, she shook away from Baldwin and took a step from his side. It was foolish, considering what he was about to declare, but judging from her uncle’s angry expression as he saw them standing together, she feared the consequences that her newly minted fiancé didn’t seem to fully grasp.
Uncle Peter was fully capable of mean and ugly pettiness. He would see her engagement as a betrayal, and if he could strike out at her…it was very likely he would do just that.
Baldwin frowned as she bent her head, but then he shifted his attention to the new additions to the room. “Mr. Shephard,” he said, his tone icy cold. “And Miss Shephard. Welcome—I’m glad you were up and could join us for a moment before the rest of the party begins the merrymaking for the day.”
“Have we interrupted something?” her uncle asked, spearing Helena with yet another glare. She felt it burning through her, accusatory.
“No,” Baldwin answered for her. “Helena and I simply wished to share our happy news with you before we make our announcements to the party at large.”
Helena held her breath as she watched for her family’s reaction. Charity went pale, but her uncle lifted both eyebrows in question. He didn’t look upset, although it was obvious what Baldwin was going to say.