He nodded and then turned to Charity to talk about landing dukes. Helena settled back in her chair with a deep sigh. Her uncle and cousin had no idea exactly how right she had to make her mind if she were going into Baldwin’s space.
It would be a challenge like no other. One she had to pass in order to survive.
Chapter Ten
There had never been a week that passed so slowly, especially the final two days, which Helena had spent in the carriage, listening to her uncle drone on endlessly. But now as the vehicle rolled up the long, winding lanes of Baldwin’s estate, she couldn’t help but thrill. She and Charity stared out the window together, her cousin commenting on the pretty trees that lined the lane.
But when the carriage turned, they both gasped, for there was Baldwin’s estate house, rising up before them. Not just a house, though, a castle! With high stone walls and turrets to make it complete. It was everything out of Arthurian legends that had enthralled her as a child in America.
Whoever Baldwin married would be a princess, indeed, assuming she brought enough coin to keep the kingdom afloat.
“He must be rolling in blunt,” Charity laughed.
Helena pursed her lips with displeasure. That was the vision Baldwin wished to put forth, of course—that his situation was safe and secure. She knew better.
“He won’t even need your money, Papa,” Charity continued with a giggle.
Uncle Peter grunted and his expression was dark and grumpy, as usual. “He’ll take it, I’m sure. Now get ready, they’re coming to open the doors.”
Helena held back, trying to calm her racing heart, as Baldwin’s servants opened the doors and helped down Charity and her father. Of course, the two of them started up the stairs without waiting for her, making clear once more her position in the family. Helena sighed and smiled at the footman who assisted her. Finally, she allowed herself to look up at the landing on the house.
Baldwin was there, standing with his mother, Charlotte and the Duke of Donburrow. He was talking to her uncle and Charity, but he glanced down at her as she slowly mounted the stairs, and his dark eyes flowed over her until she felt warm from her head to her toes.
Seeing him was just as powerful as she feared it would be. It brought back all the feelings she’d been telling herself she could stifle. And all the memories of the trust he’d put in her and the pain she’d seen during his desperate confession.
She forced a smile in the hopes that it would ease any concerns he had about giving her his secrets. She would protect them well.
As her uncle and cousin stepped away to say hello to the duchess, Baldwin came down to meet her. “Hello,” he said softly.
She smiled again, but this time it felt so very much weaker. It was impossible to be strong when he was standing right there and he was so damned beautiful.
“Your Grace,” she said. “Your home is lovely.”
He glanced up and she saw that flicker of trouble cross his expression. Only now she knew exactly why he feared. Why he hesitated. Why he frowned so often.
“Thank you, Helena,” he replied at last. “I’m glad you could come.”
“I’m glad to be here,” she assured him.
She wanted to take his hand. Her own actually twitched like it would move of its own accord, and she had to fist it at her side to keep that from happening. He never moved, just stood looking at her. The moment stretched between them, just a bit too long, and she forced herself to step away.
“Helena!” Charlotte called out with a wide smile.
Helena glanced at Baldwin one last time, then moved toward her friend. She was surprised that Charlotte pulled her in for a hug and Ewan squeezed her hand gently as they chatted. But before she could get too involved with them, Uncle Peter barked, “Helena, come along. Your cousin needs your help!”
“I’m sorry, excuse me,” she muttered with a blush, then scurried up the stairs to fall in step beside Charity. She didn’t dare look back at either Charlotte or Baldwin. She feared they’d both be watching her. One with pity or even judgment. One with heat.
She could bear neither in that moment.
The servants took them to the top of the stairs and down the hall. Uncle Peter was taken to one room, while Charity and Helena were taken to another. As the butler drew the door open, Helena gasped. It was beautiful, with a view that looked over the expansive garden and a huge four-poster bed.
“Fit for a queen,” Charity giggled as Walker excused himself and left them alone for a moment. She moved to the bed and flopped herself across the intricately stitched coverlet. “Or a duchess. This must be the nicest room in the house—I hope it means he likes me more than he’s let on.”
Helena shifted. It truly was a beautiful space. There were so many greens in the tasteful décor all around them. It was lovely and soothing.
“Or maybe it’s you he likes.”
Helena froze at the window, staring out into the garden. She swallowed hard, trying to make her expression serene as she looked back at her cousin at last. “I have no idea what you are talking about. The Duke of Sheffield like me?”
Charity folded her arms. “I haven’t said anything, but I saw you two sneak out together from the Donburrow party last week.”
Helena’s lips parted. That no one had seemed to notice their brief absence had been the greatest of reliefs. She’d never known Charity to be discreet about anything, so she was shocked her cousin had kept that secret.
It could not bode well.
“Add that to when I found you alone in his home in London,” Charity continued, ticking evidence of Helena’s sins off on her fingers. “Then today when you came up the stairs and he met you? I saw some kind of…connection between you.”
Helena’s heart throbbed. The last thing she needed was for Charity to report whatever she believed to her father. He’d already threatened Helena once. She didn’t need more of the same.
“I’m certain you’re seeing things. The man is polite, that is all.” Helena’s tone was breathless even though she didn’t want it to be.
Her cousin moved on her, bright eyes flashing with annoyance. “As Papa said so many times, you’re here for me. I defended you before, but I won’t do it again if you insist on putting yourself where you don’t belong.”
Helena swallowed. “Of course.”
Charity bobbed her head with another glare. “I see there’s a connecting room here. It’s likely to my sitting room. If there is a settee there, you can sleep on it. I don’t feel like sharing the big bed. Now I intend to take a nap until my things arrive and then you can help me pick my clothes for the supper tonight.”
Helena sighed and backed from the room into the connecting sitting room. “Very well.”