She pressed her hand to her stomach, bending over with a long moan. I moved to go to her, and she screamed, “Stop! Don’t touch me. Just… don’t.”
The alarm sounded on the computer, and I glanced over at the screen. A snowmobile was coming up the mountain. Not the north side Zoe or I usually traveled, but the south side. The screen changed, and I could see someone knocking on Zoe’s cabin’s front door. Someone else checking the other door.
A search party.
“The day before you arrived, two squirrels were playing on the camera that secured that part of my property.” My voice was steady, matter of fact even though every part of me was shaking in fear. “They managed to knock it off its mounting, and I planned to go down and fix it. Then you arrived, and…”
How did I finish the sentence? None of the explanations racing through my mind would calm her fears.
“And you decided to… what exactly, Gray?” Her voice was like ice.
“I saw you crying. It was like you cried all the time at first. I watched because I was worried, then you started to smile again, and I couldn’t look away.”
The alarm sounded again.
“What’s that?” she asked, turning back to the computer, but her hand was still up, palm out, stopping me from approaching her.
“I have sensors and cameras all around my property. When someone approaches, I know.”
She looked at the screen. “That’s how you knew I’d gone over the edge.”
“Yes.”
She blew out a breath and pushed her hair away from her face. The alarm for my driveway went off. The snowmobile was coming our way. I didn’t have much time to make her understand. Maggie whined, racing to the door, to the front window. She knew I didn’t have much time left either.
“I know that you hate me right now. I don’t blame you. I’m hating myself too. But as creepy and exploitive as it sounds, I meant you no harm. I was worried. The way you cried broke something inside me. Yes, I was drawn to your beauty, but I was drawn to something else that I still don’t know if I can explain.”
Another alarm. Closer.
“The truth is… I love you, Zoe. I know it’s crazy to feel so strongly for another person in such a short amount of time, but I love you.”
Maggie started barking. Tears flowed down Zoe’s face in rivers.
The snowmobile engine stopped. Boots on the porch. A sharp knock on the door.
Still, she said nothing, just looked at me like her entire spirit was emptying through her eyes.
The knock again. More barking.
Defeated, I turned and walked to the door.
“Sir, I’m with search and rescue, and we have reports of a missing woman.” He held up Zoe’s picture. “She was reported missing a week ago and—”
I stepped aside and waved him in.
“Miss Meadows?”
Zoe swiped at the tears on her face, nodding, and the man turned a sharp look at me. Stepping several quick paces away from where I stood, he pressed a button on the radio secured to his shoulder. His eyes never leaving me, he spoke into the mic. “Zoe Meadows has been recovered. Repeat. Zoe Meadows has been recovered. Alive and well.” He gave our position and alarms started sounding again as more members of the team headed our way.
The man approached Zoe, who was still standing there, frozen like a statue. “Miss Meadows, are you hurt? Have you been threatened in any way?” I noticed he never turned his back on me.
Slowly, she shook her head, her eyes on mine.
He kept asking her questions. She kept answering them, but I didn’t hear, tuning everything out until a blonde woman burst through the door.
“Zoe!”
The dam burst on Zoe’s emotions again, and she began to cry as she was swept into the woman’s embrace. “Leslie.”
“I thought you were dead,” Leslie cried, and the women sank to the floor. Maggie nudged her cold nose into my hand. Go was gone, probably hiding under the couch. “We’ve tried to find you, but the snow, there was an avalanche. The conditions were so bad. They said…” Leslie’s voice hitched, “they said that if you hadn’t made it to your cabin then you were…” She clamped her mouth shut, refusing to say the word again.
A deputy appeared at my side, and it was my turn to answer questions. I did so automatically, giving him details of the rescue, her concussion, my eyes never leaving the women.
Leslie placed her hands on Zoe’s face and kissed her cheek, then her entire body grew tense. The deputy was still talking but I tuned him out.
“Zoe, something bad has happened.”
“Mr. Maddox, did you hear me?”
I held up a hand for him to wait and took a step toward the women. Zoe looked up and our eyes met, but I couldn’t read what she was thinking.
“Zoe…” Her eyes went back to her friend, and Leslie continued. “It’s your mom. She overdosed. It’s bad. Very, very bad, and we need to get to the hospital soon if…”
If she wanted to say goodbye.
Leslie didn’t finish the sentence, but she hadn’t needed to. I could tell what she was going to say, and Zoe clearly understood too.
I knew heartache. I’d experienced it many times. But I’d never seen the raw pain of it explode on another human’s face, like I was experiencing now.
It wasn’t just the soon to be loss of her mother, even though that was bad enough. And the bitch of it was that I didn’t know if I should go to her. Didn’t know if she’d welcome me or push me away.
“Are… are you sure?” Zoe asked, needing it spelled out. Needing to give her friend a second chance to tell her it was all a joke, or that she was wrong, or that it might not be as bad as they thought.
Leslie only nodded, her face tight. From her expression, it was obvious that she was ambivalent about what was happening. How could you grieve someone who caused your best friend so much pain?
I understood.
Zoe would grieve her mother, sure. The bond between mother and child was the strongest element on Earth. No matter the beatings, the neglect, the hate… the bond was still there. The hope that things could be mended. Be better. Be as they should.
As Zoe broke, I couldn’t stay where I was, standing here incompetent and useless. If she pushed me away, I’d go. If she didn’t, I’d do anything she wanted.
Sinking to my knees, I placed a gentle hand on Zoe’s, and met Leslie’s eyes over her bent head. Years of understanding was exchanged in that one glance, and Leslie nodded, handing her friend over to me.
I took her, held her close to my chest, took the beating as her fists pounded on my arms, then relaxed and clung to me instead.
Time sped up and stood still as I held her, waiting for the torment to end.
More people came. Other people went. And I held her until she was silent.
“Miss Meadows?” Zoe wiped her nose on the sleeve of the robe and lifted her head to the deputy. “I’m sorry, but we need to go.”
A vice came around my heart, squeezing until I thought it would truly stop beating this time.
Then it did as Zoe stood, using my shoulders to steady herself. Leslie went with her to the bedroom, and they returned a few minutes later, Zoe dressed in her jeans and sweater.