I huff out a sad laugh and shake my head. “Rey, you don’t understand. It took a stranger caring for me to get a fucking wakeup call. I was bloody drowning in guilt and depression over Marisa. I wasn’t letting anybody throw me a life raft. Including you. Even though I cared for you…loved you even…it didn’t matter. Nothing you could have said would have stopped me. Lust and recovery do not mix.”
She nods her head and looks down, picking at the cuticle on her nail. Her expression is troubled, but she doesn’t tell me why. And I’m not going to ask. Truly, we are two completely different people than we were back then. We have so many dark and complicated memories together; being mates would only remind us of all of that. Distance is best for Rey and me. That was glaringly obvious when I saw her at her pub opening a couple of weeks ago with Liam. Her finding Liam was the best thing for both of us. I’m done with the sorry bastard I was with her.
“So, no love on the horizon for Hayden Clarke then?” she asks playfully.
I laugh, “No, I’m putting myself at number one for quite some time. This is something I’m always going to have to work at. But I feel good. I feel at peace. Tonight felt like a graduation ceremony for me. Made me feel like I could be a normal bloke again someday.”
“I can see that.” She smiles and steps closer to me, grabbing the lapels of my jacket and pulling me down for a hug. She giggles softly at my awkward hunch and whispers, “I’m always here if you need me.”
I tuck my face into her and inhale deeply. It brings me immense relief when her familiar scent puts me at ease rather than making me feel love-sick. “I’ve always known that, Rey.” Despite how bad we were for each other, I’ve never doubted that.
We head back inside and join everyone back at the table, which is now filled with Theo, Leslie, Liam, Brody, and Finley.
“So Lez, when are we going to have a hen night?” Finley asks as I take a seat next to my brother. “Your wedding is in five weeks and we have to get this planned.”
“Oh God, I haven’t a clue,” Leslie groans. “I still have a million things to do.”
“Well if you guys wouldn’t have rushed the wedding—”
“Rushed?” I interrupt Finley with a laugh. “Theo’s been cross at Leslie for ages for making him wait this long. If she’d put him off even another day, he would have gone completely mental.”
Theo eyes me sternly through his glasses as everybody gawks at him. “Hayden, my dear brother,” he starts, “you watch the love of your life give birth to the second love of your life and then tell me that you could wait a second longer to make your family completely yours in every way possible.”
His devoted proclamation stuns me. It stuns the whole table as we all stare at him completely gobsmacked. A sniffle from Leslie diverts my eyes.
“Damn, Theo. You can’t say that shit in public. I’m still a post-natal emotional mess.” Leslie wipes fresh tears from her eyes and grabs his face. She plants a fierce kiss on his lips, completely oblivious to the audience around them. She breaks their kiss and her eyes are swimming with emotion. “I love you.”
Theo closes his eyes and rests his forehead against hers and breathes a deep, contented breath. It’s as if he’s drinking in the words from her mouth, pulling them into his lungs, and pushing them out through his bloodstream straight to his heart. It’s such a tender moment, I can’t look away.
The announcer breaks the mood, informing everyone to take their seats for the auction portion of the fundraiser to begin. Leslie, Theo, and I stand to head over to my parent’s table, but my heart stutters as I catch sight of a familiar woman in a white dress.
“Vi,” I say on a quiet exhale without even thinking. I look around nervously and am grateful no one seems to have heard me. I didn’t even mean to say her name out loud, but the truth is her name has been on repeat in my mind since two weeks ago. This mess of long blonde hair and long, spindly limbs literally knocked me flat on my back and I’ve been seeing stars ever since.
What the hell is she doing here?
My eyes slant and do a double take to confirm they aren’t tricking me. My view is distracted by some guy in a baggy tuxedo who has his hands wrapped tightly around her waist. He’s standing behind her and whispering into her ear as she giggles halfheartedly. Or at least I think it’s halfheartedly. Just then, she gives him a coy “come hither” look that makes me feel immediately…annoyed.
Without permission, my gaze takes a walk down her body, absorbing how her snug dress hugs every line of her slim frame. The dim chandelier light bounces off the shimmering fabric and creates a glowing effect all around her.
Christ, she’s still gorgeous.
She appears to be guiding the man-boy in our direction. Just when I snap out of my daze, Leslie’s voice calls out, “Vi? Benji? You guys okay?”