For a second I wonder if Gage pulled back, but the low set of his brows and firm set of his jaw give away that this isn’t Lucas. “I hope so; if not, then waking up from this dream will be torture.”
He nudges against me and slowly inches inside. His eyes never leave mine and we watch each other in fascination as our bodies come together, to connect physically the way we already have emotionally.
He pins me against the tile in an unrelenting hold. “We’re never letting you go, Shy. This is it. Run, we’ll find you. Hide, we’ll sniff you out.” He thrusts forward in what I’m sure is supposed to be threatening, but it only works to pull my orgasm closer to the surface. “You’ll never be rid of us.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” His threats should scare me, but instead they make me feel safer, more secure, than I’ve ever felt before. Because that’s been my fear all along, my reason for keeping distance from those who mean the most to me, because I’d never survive losing someone I love again.
His face twists in agony and he drops his forehead to my shoulder while pushing and pulling inside me. “Promise me.”
I can’t imagine life without Lucas. Without Gage. All my hopes and dreams paled the day I met them and since then have fizzled into something so much bigger than a job and notoriety. Now all that matters is us. Our love, a life together.
I was meant for big things. My momma knew it. And loving Lucas is bigger than anything I could’ve imagined.
“I promise.” I nuzzle his hair, pulling him deeper into my embrace. “You’re stuck with me.”
“Fuck, yeah.” His thrusts quicken and things turn frenzied. Hands grip, nails bite, and when he yanks my head to the side, he whispers in my ear, “I love you, Shyann.”
As if our bodies are in tune, my orgasm rips through me seconds before he thrusts one last time and groans into my neck. We hold on to each other, panting for breath through the steam, our hearts pounding against our ribs.
He leans away so that his mouth is at my ear. “I’m yours. From here on out, nothing will touch you. I’ll never let anyone hurt you.”
“And I’ll never let anyone hurt you, Gage.”
With a shuddering exhale, his body stills. “Thank you,” he whispers, and his muscles soften against me as his death grip on me loosens. After a few deep breaths, he pulls back, blinking, and a shy smile curves his lips. And there’s a little cockiness there too.
I giggle and cup his jaw. “Hey, Lucas.”
He rests his forehead against mine. “I missed you.”
My eyes dart to where our bodies are joined. “Don’t think I can get any closer.”
He laughs, and the sound cocoons me in acceptance and love. “Let’s get dry. I want you back in my bed.”
He lowers me to my feet and gets rid of the condom before holding a towel out and folding me in his arms. We dry and crawl into his bed naked, wrapping ourselves up in each other and nose to nose.
“You changed the sheets.” These are dark gray and smell like soap.
He blushes. “Tossed the old ones.” His fingers twirl a long strand of my hair and his expression grows serious. “I’m going to make it my life’s mission to make you happy, Shy.” He tries to hide it, but I see the fear work behind his eyes. “I’ll do whatever it takes. Therapy, medication, whatever—”
“You’ve spent most of your life trying to earn the love of a woman.”
“We’re not easy to love.”
It’s not the words that shatter my heart; it’s the way he says it, as if it’s the gospel truth. Hooking my fingers under his chin, I force his eyes to mine. “Nothing has ever been easier for me, and I’m not going to make this hard for you, Lucas. Just being with you is enough.”
He shrugs one shoulder. “I’m broken. Split. I’ll never be normal.”
“I know things won’t always be easy, but I don’t want to change you. I love you the way you are, everything about the way you are and you’re who I want. You’ve never given yourself the freedom to just be. You don’t have to hide who you are anymore, Lucas. Ever again. Especially not from me.”
“I don’t deserve you.” He blinks and his eyes focus just over my shoulder before coming back to me. “He’s pretty full of himself, isn’t he.”
“He is the perfect yin to your yang.”
His lips brush against mine. “Would you rather . . .” Another kiss. “Leave Payson and chase your dreams?” His tongue dips into my mouth and I open to him, tasting his apprehension, his vulnerability, and I kiss him with a passion I hope puts all his concerns to rest. “Or . . .” He kisses the tip of my nose. “Throw it all away for a guy going nowhere fast?”
“Hmm . . .” I tap my chin. “Leaving Payson means walking away from everyone I love, and I don’t have to go far to chase my dreams because they’re all wrapped up in the man who’s currently wrapped around me.”
His eyes slam closed. “Shy . . .”
“So I pick stay in Payson and chase down my future with the man who owns my heart.” He doesn’t respond but watches me thoughtfully. “So? What do you say? Can you live with that?”
“We can.”
FORTY-ONE
SHYANN