Slouch Witch (The Lazy Girl's Guide to Magic, #1)

‘Not happening.’ He leant closer. ‘How about honey?’

I met his eyes. I felt surprisingly hot and bothered. ‘Are you flirting with me?’

‘Trust me, Ivy. When I flirt with you, you’ll know all about it.’

I couldn’t help wondering whether that was a threat or a promise. I licked my lips. ‘Those runes…’

He moved back, the mention of work making him return immediately to his usual business-like self. ‘I suppose they’re worth a try.’ He glanced at me sideways. ‘Watch carefully. You might learn something.’

I fixed my gaze on his hands. He raised them, using not one but both to sketch out the rune. This was complex stuff indeed. No wonder he was held in such high regard. Not that I was going to let him know I was impressed. ‘Nothing’s happened,’ I remarked.

Winter rolled his eyes. ‘The spell only works for me.’ He paused. ‘But then you knew that, didn’t you?’

I grinned.

He walked forward, swinging his head from side to side as he passed each stack of boxes. I had a fairly good idea how this would go down. Nothing would register and we’d still have to search the place from top to bottom. All the same, I ambled along behind him, taking the opportunity for some momentary peace and quiet to relax.

About halfway along, Winter halted, his back ramrod straight. It was so unexpected and I was so lost in the swirl of my own chaotic thoughts that I didn’t notice until I was almost past him. ‘What is it?’

He swivelled round to his left where a shabby pile of card boxes lay, stacked in an untidy heap. It was a wonder they’d not toppled over.

‘No way,’ I breathed. ‘Was I actually right?’ I bellowed a laugh. ‘Is the sceptre really here?’ I started bopping around. ‘The non-Order witch saves the Order’s hide. Who’s the boss now? Eh? Eh?’

‘Shut up.’

I supposed I wasn’t acting like a particularly gracious winner but it still felt good. I stopped talking but I was still bouncing.

Winter strode over to the boxes and started pulling them off the pile, one after the other. After the first four or five, he turned and glared at me. ‘I suppose it would be too much to ask for a little help?’

‘As you’ve already said, the spell doesn’t work for me. I have no way of knowing which box the sceptre is hiding in. So it’s probably better if you do the heavy lifting.’

Even from several feet away, I could see Winter grit his teeth. ‘Except,’ he muttered, ‘I don’t think it’s in any of the boxes.’

I eyed the pile. ‘It’s underneath?’ No wonder the stack resembled the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Although you had to wonder at the First Level witches who would go to such lengths for a prank. Surely they’d have made their point if they’d simply left the stupid thing on the top?

‘Just get over here.’

I took my time shuffling over. Winter was picking up and discarding boxes so quickly, he already had a sheen of sweat across his brow. I reached out and placed my hand on his arm. ‘Allow me,’ I said kindly. I drew the same rune I’d used yesterday in the gym that made all the boxes, regardless of their size or weight, feel as light as air. Winter reached for another one and almost fell backwards at its unexpected lightness.

‘What did you do?’ he asked.

‘Just a little spell I picked up during my time out in the wilderness,’ I said smugly. I grabbed a box and lifted it up, using only the tip of my index finger. I pretended to groan and strain.

‘You did this yesterday, didn’t you? You had the same expression on your face when you were lifting weights.’

Uh oh. ‘Nooooo.’ I shook my head. ‘I wouldn’t do such a thing.’ I tossed the box to one side, put my hands behind my back and began to whistle, avoiding Winter’s glare.

‘Unbelievable.’

I cocked my head. ‘Is it though?’

‘You probably expended more energy avoiding exercise than doing the exercise itself.’

Somehow I doubted that. ‘Chill out,’ I drawled. ‘You need to realise that the path of least resistance is always the best.’

‘This is like dealing with a toddler.’

I raised my eyebrows. ‘You’re the one throwing your toys out of the pram.’

‘Whenever I think that we might be able to make this work, you revert to type. You’re almost entirely untrained and yet look at the talent you’ve got. You’re wasting it all.’ He seemed genuinely angry.

‘Well, look at you!’ I shot back. ‘Ninety per cent of the time you’re a sad sack jobsworth who can’t crack a smile unless it’s on Order instructions. Then you show flashes of fun and a sense of humour and genuine thoughtfulness. It doesn’t last though, does it? All work and no play makes Jack a very dull boy.’

‘All play and no work makes Jack a mere toy,’ Winter retorted. ‘I didn’t ask for this, you know. I didn’t even want a partner.’

‘Is that supposed to make me feel better?’

Winter turned away, shoving his hands into his pockets. He was very, very pissed off. And to think that a few minutes ago we’d almost been flirting. I grimaced and reached out, gently touching his shoulder.

‘I’m sorry,’ I said gruffly. ‘Obviously, we’re just opposites who’ve been thrown together through no fault of our own. We rub each other up the wrong way. My priorities are different to yours.’ I sighed. ‘I won’t cheat again.’

‘Is that what you said eight years ago?’

I bit my lip. Winter cursed and looked back at me. ‘Let’s just find the sceptre and get out of here. Alright? We’ll worry about this … partnership later.’

I nodded. ‘Yeah. Okay.’ I paused. ‘Should I undo the spell on the boxes?’

‘Don’t be ridiculous.’ And then he closed his mouth and stopped speaking altogether.

In silence, we made short work of the rest of the boxes, tossing them to the side and clearing the way. Despite having been moved round the previous day, they still kicked up a lot of dust, making me sneeze violently on several occasions. The rest of the time, I kept my head down and avoided looking at Winter.

We finished moving the boxes and stared down at the dusty floor. There was no shiny golden sceptre waiting to be rescued – but there was a trapdoor. A single padlock, which was obviously brand new, gleamed up at us. I didn’t need to glance at Winter to feel his tension.