‘Read it for yourself,’ I said, relieved to be able to share my burden. I rubbed my eyes until I was satisfied they were dry. ‘God, I hadn’t realised just how stressful it’s been, keeping this all inside.’
Theresa’s eyes darted from left to right, her lips silently moving as she scanned the page.
‘Jesus!’ Theresa murmured. ‘You had a DNA test? I take it Emma doesn’t know?’
I shook my head. ‘And that’s the way it has to stay, at least until I figure out what to do. Luke is the father. He has to be.’
‘Are you sure? I remember she was looking into sperm donors around that time. How do you know it’s not someone else?’
‘There’s a lot more to it than that.’ I straightened in my chair as I regained my composure. ‘But you’ve got to promise me; you can’t let this go any further.’
She cupped my hand and gave it a squeeze. ‘It won’t. I’m here for both of you, and this is my sister we’re talking about. I only want what’s best for her.’
Sliding my vaporiser from my pocket, I began to suck on the plastic tip. Emma hated me using it in the shop, but I was desperate for a cigarette. Theresa rose from the table and walked to a dial on the wall. I knew she was hiding her shock, trying to stay strong to support me. I was grateful to hear a little click as she turned the heat down. She returned, bringing a pack of cigarettes with her.
‘Here,’ she said, throwing me a lighter. ‘Just don’t dob me in.’
‘But the dresses,’ I said, despite taking a cigarette from the pack.
‘Sod it, nothing a bit of air freshener won’t cover up.’
I closed my eyes as I inhaled, enjoying the kick that only a real cigarette could bring. If Emma could see us both now, flicking cigarette ash into a saucer on the table. She’d be horrified. I glanced at my watch, conscious of the time, and, pulling myself together, explained how Emma had tried to send Luke into an early grave.
‘I don’t believe it,’ Theresa said, aghast. ‘Not Emma. She would have said something. She would have told me.’
‘She compartmentalised the whole incident; put it all behind her.’ I exhaled, feeling empty like I had nothing left to give. ‘I only found out because I insisted on selling the house. She was adamant that he was dead, but when she went back to dig the grave, there was nothing there.’ I rubbed my chin. ‘He can’t have just disappeared into thin air. Unless . . .’
‘Unless it never happened,’ Theresa said, her face solemn. ‘Maybe she’s made it up to take the blame for everything that’s going on.’
‘But you’re forgetting,’ I said, taking another drag of my cigarette. ‘Jamie’s been fathered by another man.’ I struggled to find the words. ‘This is going to sound crazy,’ I said. ‘But I met Luke in Leeds. He tracked me down somehow and asked to meet up. He lives there now and he wanted me to tell Emma to stay away.’
‘What?’ she said, slamming her tumbler on to the table after emptying its contents. Unscrewing the lid from the whisky bottle, she refilled her glass. ‘How is that possible?’
I shrugged. ‘None of this makes any sense. I haven’t told Emma yet. I need to know what I’m dealing with. The last thing I want is her having a full-on relapse.’ I clasped and unclasped my hands. There was no escaping it. Despite everything she had done, I still loved my wife. What a fool I was.
I ran through my meeting with Luke and our conversation in the bar. The confused expression on Theresa’s face would have been comical, had the subject matter not been so devastating.
‘We’ve got to find out if the man you spoke to is actually the real Luke Priestwood,’ Theresa said, stubbing out her cigarette. ‘He’s got an older brother, I remember him from school. I think he’s got a sister too.’ She clenched her hands, a frown crossing her face. ‘All this stuff that’s been happening, I thought it was Emma, but maybe they’re setting her up to make it look that way.’
‘But why now?’ I asked.
‘Why not? Think about it. Maybe Emma was telling the truth and she did kill Luke. What if they found the body, or are trying to draw her out because he’s still missing and they’re worried she’s responsible for his death?’
‘It’s possible, I suppose. Luke’s brother could be posing as him, using his identity. He had a scar on the back of his head, said it was from when Emma hit him with the shovel.’ I felt a pang of guilt. I had been quick to point the finger in Emma’s direction. At least Theresa was trying to vindicate her sister. I checked my watch for a second time. ‘I’m sorry to put this burden on you and leave but I’ve got to pick up Jamie from nursery.’
‘She’s my sister. I’d be more upset if you didn’t tell me,’ Theresa said. ‘Leave it with me. I’ll put some feelers out for Luke, see what I can find out about him. But there’s something we need to do first.’
‘What’s that?’ I said, rising from the table and emptying the cigarette butts into the bin. I stood at the sink and rinsed the saucer. Theresa would clean up the rest, make it look like we had never met.
‘We need to dig up the land.’ She nodded in agreement with herself, her face set in determination. ‘Yes, that’s what we’ll do. Hire a digger and go deep. Because if there is a body buried in there and you sell the house, my sister’s going to jail.’
CHAPTER FIFTY-FOUR
ALEX
2017
I drove across the Strood to home, my thoughts battling against each other as I worked out where my loyalties lay. I glanced in my rear-view mirror. There was only one answer to that question, and he was asleep in the back seat. Clinging to his teddy, Jamie was dressed like Paddington Bear in his blue dungarees and red wellington boots. All he needed was a brown luggage label. Please look after this boy, thank you. My heart warmed at the sight of his cherubic face. He had truly been a precious bundle, a gift from God. I came to a decision. None of this was his fault. Regardless of the DNA results, he was my child, and he could rely on me. I would never let him down.
I returned my focus to the road, which was still wet from the afternoon tide. A flock of seagulls flew in the periphery, catching the glint of the sun on their backs. The nearer I came to home, the stronger the sense of timelessness became. Had I expected things to be different, just because my world had blown apart? I drove past the long green hedgerows, the tractors and cyclists, the people who had remained the same. My inner world had collapsed, yet life went on as usual. I wondered what had driven Emma’s father to settle in East Mersea, when the west side of the island was filled with community life.