She's Not There

“They’re okay. Confused, of course. They don’t understand how you could just take off like that.”


Caroline inched forward. “Mrs. Hollister,” she said, about to extend her hand when she realized that Beth wasn’t about to release her grip on Lili. “I’m Caroline Shipley. This is my ex-husband, Hunter, and our daughter, Michelle. I’m so sorry about the scene out front.”

“I don’t understand. What are all those people doing here? Why would you think I called them?” Beth looked from Caroline to Hunter to Michelle, then back to Caroline.

“We didn’t know what to think,” Caroline said.

“If you didn’t call them, who did?” Michelle asked.

The question lingered in the air, like a stale cooking odor.

“It doesn’t really matter,” Hunter said. “It’s a moot point. Someone obviously tipped the vultures off and they’re not going away anytime soon.”

“This is such a nightmare,” Beth said.

“Can I take your coat?” Caroline offered.

“No, thanks. We won’t be staying long.”

Caroline glanced uneasily in Hunter’s direction, anxious at Beth’s use of the word “we.” “Why don’t we go into the living room where we can talk?”

Beth remained rooted to the spot.

“Come on, Mom,” Lili urged gently, and Caroline felt another stab of anxiety. “You came all this way.”

“I came to take you home.”

“Please,” Caroline said. “Surely you can stay a little while.”

“I told the cabdriver to come back in half an hour.”

“Which doesn’t give us a whole lot of time,” Michelle said as they proceeded into the living room.

“Have you had anything to eat?” Caroline asked. “Can I get you some tea or coffee?”

“Some tea would be nice,” Beth said, unfastening the top button of her coat. “If it’s no trouble.”

“I’ll make it,” Lili offered.

“I’ll do it,” Michelle said. “How do you take it?”

“Milk and a little sugar, thank you.”

“Anybody else?”

“I’ll have some,” Caroline said. “Just a tiny bit of milk.”

“I know how you take your tea, Mom.”

“Why don’t we sit down?” Hunter said, as if he still lived here.

Caroline and Hunter lowered themselves into the chairs as Lili and Beth, their hands still intertwined, positioned themselves on the sofa.

“You have a lovely home,” Beth said.

“Thank you.”

“And such a beautiful tree.” She nodded in its direction.

“Lili helped decorate it,” Caroline said, watching the tiny white lights sparkle. She’d pulled the drapes shut earlier in the afternoon in an effort to keep prying eyes at bay. The result was that the room, normally airy and bright, felt small and claustrophobic. The tree helped liven things up a bit. “Are you sure I can’t take your coat?” she asked.

“I’m fine, thank you.”

“How was your flight?” Hunter asked.

“Not bad once we finally got off the ground.”

“Yes, I understand there was quite a storm.”

Really? Caroline thought. We’re talking about the weather?

“We had to wait on the tarmac for more than two hours. They had to keep de-icing the plane. It was touch and go there for a while whether we’d actually take off.”

Her voice was deep, almost husky, nothing at all like Lili’s.

Caroline scanned Beth’s face for anything that might connect her to the girl at her side, but found nothing that matched up. Their eyes were different colors, their noses different shapes. Beth’s jaw was round and delicate whereas Lili’s jaw was square and more sharply defined. Hunter’s jaw. Caroline stole a glance at her former husband, wondering if he was thinking the same thing.

“The weather here is always so perfect,” Lili was saying. “Sunshine every day.”

“I would imagine that could get quite monotonous,” Beth said.

“There are worse things,” Hunter said with a smile.

“Yes,” Beth agreed. “And, unfortunately, this is one of them.”

So much for the weather, Caroline thought. “Believe me, I understand how difficult this must be for you,” she said.

“No more difficult than I’m sure it is for you. Having to relive such a painful time in your lives, having your hopes raised.” She took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. “But they’re false hopes. And it’s just so unfortunate. You don’t deserve this. You’ve been more than kind, more than understanding, listening to this nonsense, indulging Lili’s fantasies…”

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