She's Not There

“First tell me who tipped you off,” Caroline said.

“You know I can’t betray a source.”

“Really? You had no trouble betraying me.”

“Not quite true. And if you think about it, I also did you a favor.”

“A favor?”

“I gave you a forum, a place to vent…”

“Without my knowledge. Without my permission.”

“You never would have given me permission.”

“Doesn’t that tell you something?”

“It was never my intention to hurt you, Caroline. I liked you. I really did. I debated with myself for hours about handing in that story. I knew there was a chance you wouldn’t understand.”

“A chance I wouldn’t understand? Understand what, exactly? That you abused my trust? That you humiliated me? That you used me to further your ambitions, to increase the size of your byline?”

“You’d been carrying around this huge burden of guilt for so many years that it was crippling you,” he argued. “I like to think I might have actually lightened that load.”

Was he really so delusional? she wondered. But then, why should he be any different than everybody else? Sometimes delusions were all that carried you through life. “Don’t you dare try to fool yourself into thinking there was anything noble about what you did,” she told him, pushing such thoughts from her head. “I bet you have a tape recorder on in your pocket right this minute, don’t you?”

He looked away, trying not to smile. “A girl shows up on your doorstep, claiming to be the daughter stolen from you fifteen years ago. That’s one hell of a story, Caroline, even if it turns out she’s not Samantha. Let me write it. Give me a chance to make things right.”

“First tell me if you really had a wife and daughter who were killed by a drunk driver.”

His sheepish expression was all the answer she needed.

“You piece of shit.”

“Talk to me, Caroline. Give me an exclusive and I swear you’ll come off more saintly than goddamn Mother Teresa.”

Caroline stared into his not-quite-handsome face, relieved to discover that all she felt was contempt. Then she wrested the door away from him and slammed it in his face.



“You should have told him to fuck off,” Michelle said later.

“Yes, it’s always a good idea, telling a reporter to fuck off,” Hunter said.

“Sometimes it’s just better to take the high road,” Caroline said.

They were gathered in her living room, waiting for Beth to arrive. Her plane had landed half an hour earlier, and she’d called Lili as soon as she cleared customs to tell her she was on her way. Lili had, in turn, told her about the growing number of media surrounding the house and asked whether she was responsible for their presence, something Beth vehemently denied.

“Is it true Samantha’s come home?” a reporter had shouted at Hunter as he was climbing out of his BMW.

“When will you get the DNA results back?” another demanded as Caroline opened the door and pulled him inside.

“Did Wainwright say who tipped him off?” Hunter asked now.

Caroline scoffed. “And betray a source?”

“There’s a cab coming down the street,” Lili announced from the window.

Caroline, Hunter, and Michelle immediately jumped to their feet in anticipation. They took a collective deep breath as the taxi pulled to a stop in front of the house and a woman emerged from its backseat.

Lili turned toward Caroline. “It’s her.”





Beth Hollister looked exactly like the photograph Lili had shown her—which meant she looked nothing at all like Lili, Caroline was thinking as she ushered the clearly distraught woman into the foyer. She was wearing a heavy black wool coat and carrying the same style overnight bag that Lili had brought with her a few days earlier. Her hair was thick and dark, more frizz than curl, and she was deathly pale. Whether this was the result of the Calgary winter or the clamoring horde of reporters that had descended upon her like a cluster of angry bees as she exited her cab, snapping pictures and flinging questions at her head like pebbles as she ran up the front walk, was impossible to tell. She lowered her bag to the floor, fear-filled brown eyes blinking rapidly as she looked around for Lili, then brimming over with tears when she saw her, and finally closing with relief as Lili rushed into her arms.

Caroline felt a pang of jealousy as she watched the two embrace. She fought the proprietary urge to jump between them and force them apart.

“Are you all right?” Beth asked Lili, smoothing some stray wisps of hair away from her forehead and holding her face in her hands.

“I’m okay. How about you?”

“About what you’d expect, under the circumstances.”

“How are Alex and Max?”

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