She scoffs. “I think you get much better service in town. I’ll call over and see if Victoria has any openings.”
Mama doesn’t waste any time as she heads over to the phone. “Mornin’,” Daddy says as he walks in.
My mother yaps on the phone as Daddy flashes a grin. “Save me, Daddy.”
He laughs and kisses my cheek. “Oh, baby girl, there’s no saving you when she gets her mind set. The boys are planning to help Cooper with baling hay later if you want to help.”
“My most dreaded chore.”
“They seem to like it here.” He tosses his hat on the table.
I sit and grab a muffin.
As much as I subconsciously wanted them to hate it here, I’m glad they’re fitting in. They’ve had as much change and hard times as I have. I’m grateful for my brother, Wyatt, and my father being here to help guide them.
“They’re trying. I think it’s hard going from the city to here.”
“It’s been great watching them with the horses. They’re naturals. They didn’t even hesitate with helping Zachary.”
The muffin falls to the floor. “What?” I almost scream. “What do you mean helping him?”
I stand and try to calm myself, but every muscle in my body is tight.
“Zach brought the horses that you refused to go get. If you would stop being so damn obstinate, he wouldn’t have had to come all this way.”
I scoff. “All this way?” Please. It’s less than a mile and he used to walk it every day. “When did he leave?”
Daddy stands, puts his hat back on, and lets out a long breath. “He’s with the boys now.”
I don’t say a word. I leave and head right out the door. He’s not allowed near my kids. I don’t want him anywhere around us. If they were to ever find out the truth about Zach and me, it would drum up too many questions. Plus, I don’t want them to like him.
I get out to the corral where the boys are sitting on the fence. Their feet dangle and they both lean forward. Zach stands in front of them with a horse, and I hear their laughter. It stops me in my tracks. Both boys are laughing. I’ve missed that sound so much. A tear falls as I clutch my chest. It’s been so long since any of us have been happy. So many months of feeling nothing.
Zach’s eyes raise and lock with mine.
As angry as I was a few minutes ago, right now I can’t find that feeling. Cayden and Logan have been sad or entirely vacant with me, and here they are, once again, seemingly whole.
“He’s not always a dipshit.” Wyatt nudges me as he sees what I’m looking at.
“Debatable.”
Zach and the boys start laughing again. He gives the boys the reins, and I watch them walk around with huge smiles.
“When are you going to wake up, Pres?”
I look over at him with frustration. I’m so tired of him pushing. “Don’t.”
He raises his hands in surrender. “I’m not saying a word.” He stops talking for only a second before opening his mouth again. “But I will say this . . .”
“You can’t help yourself.”
“I think those boys need to see their mama smile and laugh. They need to see that it’s okay to be happy.”
Wyatt’s arm wraps around my waist. He holds me against him and Zach’s eyes find mine again. “They love you, Presley. They see you and watch how you’re barely holding on. It’s hard for kids to see their mama like that. So, go show them you’re happy they’re allowed to be.”
He’s probably right. I don’t want them to think it’s not okay to live. I want happiness for them. Hell, I want it for me too. I want to stop seeing that night. It’s killing me. I have dark circles under my eyes, my clothes are loose, and I’m so damn tired.
I walk slowly over toward the corral and hold myself together. “Boys,” I say with a smile.
“Mom!” Logan rushes over. “Look! This is mine and that’s Cayden’s new horse!”
“Whoa!” I’m taken aback. “I didn’t know you got your own horses.”
“Isn’t it awesome?”
“It sure is! Did you name them?”
“No! Cay!” Logan yells over to his brother. “We have to name them!”
The boys run off, trotting them around the ring. I smile. Each time the horse does something new, they both come to life. It reminds me of the Christmas that Todd and I got them each the bikes they wanted. We had to bundle them in five layers so they could ride in the freezing cold.
“I can’t believe Cooper and my daddy could afford this,” I say to myself.
I look at Zach, and he smiles. “Well, your dad bought two new horses, but I thought that maybe the boys would like their own too.”
“You did this?” I ask. “You gave them two horses?”
“They can’t live on a farm without a horse.”
“Zach,” I whisper, “it’s too much.”