“But you didn’t stop there?” Rask states.
“Nope, couldn’t. My dad even tried with therapy and it’d work for a bit, but when I went into the Senate all the young interns we’re eager to please me. The best ones were the shy and timid ones who wore those short skirts, but still had their cherries. I remember each one I popped.”
His head goes flying into the table again, this time much harder. When he’s able to lift up, his eyes are dazed.
“Why the cover-up? Why tell everyone we were dead?” Evan asks.
“Because you couldn’t just do the job you were sent to do, you had to go and kill my friend and open the hive. All my hard work, lost.” He looks off toward the window, likely remembering his victims, although to him they’re not victims, but conquests.
“You’re one sick mother fucker, you know that?” I say.
He shrugs. “There’s no cure for what I have.”
“Yes there is, it’s called death. The world would be a better place if you weren’t in it.”
Lawson laughs. “I don’t know why you’re all so bitter; you got your lives back.”
“Our lives and the lives of our families were destroyed. And since we’ve been back we’ve been battling a barrage of shit that you created because you were afraid of getting caught. Did you really think this was all going to go away and that we’d never work to bring you to justice?” Rask questions, but Lawson doesn’t answer. He doesn’t even look at Rask when he’s speaking.
“No, he seriously thought he’d get away with it,” River adds much to my agreement.
“Oh and, McCoy, do you ever lie awake at night, wondering how my lovely Donna had photos of your sweet Claire?”
I do every night and am afraid of the answer. I fear that if Lawson tells me, and I tell Penny, it’ll shatter her world. I can’t do that. Instead, I smugly shake my head and don’t give him the satisfaction of needing to know. Some things are better left untold.
“Times up,” the guard says, ending our conversation. I don’t know if I feel relieved or not, but I do have some perverse satisfaction in knowing that he’s bleeding because of me.
Lawson is forced to stand and takes one last look at us. “Is Donna really dead?”
“Yes,” we say in unison.
“Shame, I’m going to miss her.”
As soon as the door closes, Cara says, “That man is seriously fucked up. If he doesn’t plead guilty, he’s going to plead insanity and get off.”
“That won’t happen,” River remarks.
“You can’t kill him.” Cara directs her statement at all of us.
“Watch me.” River slams his hands down on the table and stands, pushing his chair out so hard it falls to the ground. Evan and Rask stand as well, while I stare down at my knife. The blood is almost dry and while I’m tempted to save it and make a voodoo doll out of it, I decide not to and wipe his blood on the bottom of my boot.
“The trial starts next week,” Cara says, reminding me that I’ll see Penny. That gives me only a few days to get the house I bought in order, in hopes she’ll stay.
I KNEW IT WAS only a matter of time before I’d be back in California after everything that happened. I didn’t, however, expect it to be so I could testify. But this is where I feel at home, and not like a stranger trying to fit it. From the very moment the sun touched my face, I was leaning my head back and soaking it all in.
Only Claire doesn’t understand. She will, though, once she sees the beach and touches the sand with her bare feet. She’ll fall in love with the always-blue sky and warm ocean water. I hope that by week’s end she’ll be trying to convince us to move. Fortunately for her, she won’t have to twist my arm too much.
The only question that remains is where will we live. Living in California isn’t cheap and it’s not like there’s a general store down the road for me to work at. I’d have to get a job, which would be hard considering I’m not qualified for anything.
Or there’s Tucker’s. I know he bought a house, but he hasn’t said much about it, other than it’s close to base. He still hasn’t decided if he’s going to retire or stay enlisted. And even though he’s asked my opinion, I haven’t given it to him. I know what happened to us will never happen again, but he could die in battle. Not that I’d expect them to actually deploy him. Not that my opinion matters. Part of me wants him to stay in because it’s all he knows. It’s been his purpose in life long before I came into the picture. I’d hate for him to give that up.