Same Beach, Next Year

“It doesn’t really do any good to argue with your parents.”


“Well, it made me feel better. I’ve never been so angry. Don’t you remember she let me accuse Daphne? She stood right there while I read Daphne the riot act. But I also had the battle royale with Carl.”

“Tell me about Cookie first. What did she say?”

I wanted every detail. I was starved for gossip. It had been a slow year on the Stono. With the boys away at college, my pipeline to the latest dirt was shut down.

“I just said to her, I can’t believe you let me threaten my daughter with that horrible boarding school when you knew you were to blame all along. She got all weepy and dramatic and tried to say she couldn’t help herself and blah blah blah. It was really unbelievable.”

“Well, drug addiction is terrible. To say the least,” I offered. “It makes nice people do awful things.”

“Agreed. But Carl heard me going at it with her and jumped in telling me not to be so hard on her. He called me a bitch. I didn’t speak to him for a week.”

“What? If Adam called me that he’d be sleeping in the barn for a year.”

“I know! And I wouldn’t blame you one little bit! Anyway, it took three trips to Betty Ford to get her sober. To be honest? I liked her better drunk and high.”

Well, that’s a helluva thing to say about your mother, I thought.

“Oh no! Was she drinking too? I never noticed her drinking that much. Gosh!”

“Listen, Eliza, I like my white wine, probably too much, and I know that, but I don’t have bottles of vodka stashed in my closet and in the garage and under the sink and in more nooks and crannies than you’d find in an English muffin. She did.”

“No kidding. My God. I never would’ve suspected that. Never!”

“Oh, she was clever. She had it all worked out so that she never had to drive or do anything that might arouse the suspicions of the authorities and land her in the county jail wearing orange or whatever color they wear here. She had Ted picking up her groceries and her neighbor picked up her dry cleaning and so forth. She sat home watching The Golden Girls on television and drinking martinis and popping pills all day and night!”

“Do Ted and Clarabeth know she went through rehab?”

“Nope. She never told a soul. I knew and Carl knew, but that’s all. You know, in my blue-blooded family we don’t like to talk about such things. Only trashy people get drunk and do drugs. Not the highfalutin likes of Cookie.”

“Right. How in the world did you find out?”

“Well, it started with the shark bite. They discovered all the Vicodin in her blood. At the same time, they discovered elevated blood alcohol levels. The combination set off all the alarms in Carl’s mind. He didn’t say anything much at the time because Cookie was honestly traumatized. But it didn’t take long for her to fall apart after the shark. She went home, believe it or not, with a big fat bottle of pain medication.”

“Good grief! Didn’t they know she was abusing pain meds?”

“Honey, these days? In a huge hospital, it’s a miracle when the right hand knows what the left one is doing. The doctor who released her wasn’t the doctor who admitted her and didn’t make the connection in the records. And I think it’s probably fair to say she did have legitimate pain. After all, that shark took a hunk out of her thigh. Anyway, a few weeks later, her UPS delivery guy saw her dancing in her garden. It was ten in the morning. She was . . . well, she was as naked as a jaybird, dancing in and around the azaleas. They weren’t even in bloom!”

I was unsure of what to make of that last remark. Perhaps there was a special southern ritual of dancing with blooming azaleas that had escaped my attention. I thought, I am, after all and through no fault of my own, from the north. And at one time, Charleston did have a reputation for celebrating her eccentrics. Stories like this were not all that unusual.

“And he had a sense that something wasn’t right. Drugs and alcohol go hand in hand.”

“Uh, yeah, they do. He called 911. It was off to the Betty for Cookie!”

“Gee, that’s too bad. But she’s okay now?”

“If complaining and criticizing about every single thing under the sun is okay, then she’s okay. I’m telling you, you’re not going to like her like this.”

“Well, I guess we’re going to see what we see,” I said. “I’m just so glad we could get together again. This vacation is my favorite time of year.”

Eve leaned over to me and patted the back of my hand.

“Carl and I were so sorry to hear about your father,” she said.

I sighed, thinking about my father’s funeral, which was painful and sparsely attended.

“Thank you. He had a good long life, you know? And he died so suddenly, it was such a terrible shock.”

“Yes, but that’s better than some long-drawn-out illness where it seems like you’re dying one cell at a time.”

“No, that’s absolutely the truth. He had a heart attack in his sleep. Went to bed on earth and woke up in heaven!”

“That’s the way to go for sure.” Eve smiled at me.

“My boys hardly knew him. He didn’t like to travel and he wasn’t particularly interested in us, for reasons I will never be able to reconcile.”

We were both quiet then, Eve giving me a moment to reflect. I was dwelling on the fact that his death was so final and that I’d never have the chance to make him see me as a whole woman who was anything but another version of my mother. It was game over. To say my parental relationships had been less than satisfying would greatly understate the intense heartache and disappointment I felt. Eve finally spoke.

“Your mom passed away when you were young, right?”

“Yes, I was just eleven and it was terrible for all of us. I think my father never got over it. And I think one reason he ignored me is that I look exactly like her. My brother looks like him.”

“Well, we both know people love people for the craziest reasons. But I’m sure your father loved you, don’t you think so?”

“Oh, I’m sure he did. He was just very reserved, like my brother, who is a sweetie once you get to know him. But not a lot of juice, you know what I mean?”

“Yes. I know.”

“By the way, your flowers were gorgeous. Thank you again.”

“Oh golly, Eliza, you’re so welcome, but I wanted to be there with you. I felt so badly that we couldn’t come.”

“You know what? Let’s make a pact to come to our children’s weddings! Let’s celebrate the happy things!”

“I’ll drink to that!” Eve said. “And Eliza, how much weight have you lost? You look fabulous! What are you doing?”

“Just drinking a lot of water,” I said. I had dropped a few pounds.

We touched our plastic water bottles and smiled.

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