The next few weeks drifted by in a blissful haze. For once, everything was going right in my life, and I was the happiest I had ever been. Candela brought a new spark and energy to our house. She had a knack for cooking, a skill that Lucy and I lacked, and our neglected kitchen was now humming and singing with the sound of banging pot lids and the delicious aroma of freshly cooked meals.
Sam promoted me to senior journalist, which involved interviewing famous authors and a bigger pay check. There was nothing I loved more than sharing a cup of coffee with a writer who had years of wisdom to impart. I got along with my coworkers, especially Trinh, who was always singing my praises to Sam. I had a feeling she played a part in my promotion.
Things with Rad were better than I could have imagined. There was a magical sense of discovery between us, like an archaeological dig. I loved the unraveling and the undoing, as though we were peeling back through layers of skin and muscle and tissue to peer into the very heart of our most authentic selves. The bond we shared was so intrinsic, so deeply rooted, that I imagined it was always there waiting for us to make the connection.
The only dark cloud to blot my perfect sky was the idea that at some point, I had to tell Rad about Ana and my lie that ultimately drove her to end her own life. Whenever this dawned on me, I sank into a state of despondency that sometimes took days to shake off. During one of my sessions with Ida, I almost revealed the lie. The truth, desperate to see the light, had made its way up from the pit of my stomach to sit at the tip of my tongue, only to be swallowed back down again.
One night, Lucy and I were in the kitchen when Candela came out of her room with a flat, rectangular box in her hand. “Look what I found under my bed.”
“What is it?” I asked.
Candela slid the box open to reveal a wooden carved Ouija board. “Oh shit,” said Lucy, recoiling in horror. “I hate those things.”
“Oh, come on, Lucy,” Candela smiled. “I’ve joined in on a few séances before. It’s fun.”
“Does it actually work?” I asked.
“Well,” said Candela, “one time when we asked if the spirits had a message for anyone in the room, the pointer skittled across on its own and stopped at the letter P. This girl Patricia just stared at it, white as a sheet.” Candela paused for dramatic effect. “Then she fainted.”
Suddenly, there was a loud knock on the door, and we all screamed in unison. “Lucy, open up! I forgot my key again!” Freddy called out.
“Jeez.” Lucy let out a deep breath. “I forgot he was coming over tonight.”
Freddy inspected the Ouija board with great interest, running his hands over the lines and grooves. “We’ve got to give this a go.”
I glanced over at Lucy, who was very much dead set against it. “Not sure if that’s a good idea, guys. Audrey?” She looked at me for support. I had to admit—I was a little curious.
“Why not? What’s the worst that can happen?”
It took a few more minutes of cajoling to convince Lucy. Then we all scrambled around the house, searching for candles. “Where should we do it?” asked Freddy.
“Coffee table.” I cleared away some magazines and a tea-stained mug. Candela put the board on the table, and we set the candles on ceramic plates, placing them on the floor around the room.
When the candles were lit, we raced around the house switching off the lights, then we assembled back in the lounge room. The atmosphere was a little unnerving as the shadows cast by the flickering candlelight fell across the Ouija board like a scene straight out of a horror movie. “Is anyone else having second thoughts?” queried Lucy.
“Oh, come on, Lucy,” Candela said cheerfully. “We’ve gone to this much effort already.”
We arranged ourselves around the coffee table and each put a finger on the pointer.
“Is there anyone there?” Candela’s tone was somber. We held our breath for a few seconds, and then it began to move. I looked up sharply. “Is anyone moving it?”
“No,” they all echoed in unison. I watched mesmerized as the pointer spelled out the word “yes” in response to Candela’s question.
“Who is it?” Candela’s voice was a little shaky.
“Hey, I think we should stop, guys,” said Lucy nervously.
“Shhhh.” Freddy looked transfixed.
The pointer moved again and landed on the letter A. My body stiffened, and a new fear gripped me as it made its way with slow deliberation to the letter N. Then it completed its journey on A. Ana. The word exploded in my mind like a hand grenade and sent me reeling into a state of panic. I withdrew my finger immediately as if I had just been scalded. Then Freddy collapsed into fits of laughter.
“You asshole!” cried Lucy, getting up and flicking the lights on. I stood up quickly, knocking my knee hard against the underside of the table, and ran straight upstairs to my bedroom, slamming the door shut behind me. I fell onto my knees, gasping for air. I’m dying, I thought. My lungs were screaming for oxygen, and in my panicked stupor, I couldn’t find a way to oblige them. Candela came bursting in and hurried over.
“Audrey! Oh my God.” She put one hand on my arm and tossed her head back and screamed, “Lucy, grab the bag of mushrooms in the fridge.”
“What?”
“Just grab the bag of mushrooms.” Almost in a heartbeat, Lucy was there with the paper bag. Candela dumped the mushrooms on the floor and put the bag over my mouth. “Audrey! Breathe . . . breathe . . . breathe.”
“Is she okay? I’ve never seen her this bad. Do we need to call anyone?”
“She’ll be okay.” Candela ran her hand soothingly up and down my back. Soon, my pulse steadied, and my breathing grew less ragged. When it was over, I sat there dazed and looked up to catch Freddy standing by the door, looking down at me with his mouth agape.
Twenty-four
It was Lucy’s birthday, and we were celebrating at Spag Bowl. Rad and I joined Lucy and Freddy sitting at their favorite table.
“Hey, birthday girl!” I leaned down to kiss her cheek. “Did you manage to get in touch with Candela?”
She shook her head. “No, I’ve been calling her all day. She didn’t come in last night, and she hasn’t been answering my texts. I hope she hasn’t forgotten.”
I pulled my phone out of my purse and tapped Candela’s number. After a few seconds, it went to voicemail. “Candela, where are you? We’re all at Spag Bowl for Lucy’s birthday dinner. Call me back.”
“What should we do?” said Lucy checking her watch. “It’s quarter to eight.”
“We should probably start without her.”
When Lucy and I got home, Candela was sitting on the steps outside the house holding the string of a red helium balloon. She grinned sheepishly when she saw us. “I’m such a shitty friend.” She stood up and gave Lucy a hug. “Happy birthday, sweetie. I’m sorry I missed it.”
“Where were you?” I asked.
“I was with a friend, and we lost track of time.”
“Who?” I could see Candela tense up in response to Lucy’s innocent question.
“What are you, my mother now?” I think the words came out harsher than she intended.
Lucy flinched. “Candela, I didn’t mean anything by it.”