I stare at my phone, willing it to do something.
Willing it to play “Happy,” by Pharrell Williams, which Lexi had programmed into my phone as her ringtone. I thought it was ridiculous, yet loved it all the same.
Anything other than this silence, which I hate, yet I don’t expect anything different, because Lexi told Gray and me, through Brian, with some very harsh words that we were to leave her alone unless we worked out our shit.
Needless to say, that hasn’t happened, although I’m wondering why because I’m so rattled by the thought of not having Lexi that I’m willing to kiss Gray’s ass in any way necessary to make things right with my girl.
When Brian came into the living room, his face a mask of thunderous rage, I actually felt like a twelve-year-old kid who got caught sneaking cigarettes in the backyard. And he laid into Gray and me with such venom that for a moment I was afraid he’d have a stroke or something. By the time he’d finished with both of us, telling us we’d both driven Lexi off from her birthday celebration, I don’t think I’d ever felt lower in my life.
Then he promptly told everyone except Georgia to leave his house, and in his exact words, “figure our shit out” or be prepared to lead a life without Lexi in it.
As I was getting into my car, I glanced up at the front door and saw Brian standing there with Georgia by his side. Her arm was around his waist and she was pressed against his side. Brian’s shoulders were slumped in disappointment, but Georgia said something to him—I can’t imagine what—and his head tilted down to look at her. His face was gentle and he nodded before bending to give her a kiss.
I’d like to imagine she told him everything would work out okay, and that Brian’s nod of affirmation was because he had confidence in Gray and me to figure this out.
Hope he’s fucking right.
Of course, I ignored Lexi’s request we not contact her and called her before I’d even made it out of Brian’s driveway. And of course, she didn’t answer. I left her a short voicemail just saying I was sorry, and then…well, what else could I say. I hung up feeling completely out of sorts and lost.
And now here I sit, nursing a glass of scotch as I sit on my couch in a dark living room and stare at my phone resting on my thigh. Desperately missing Lexi, and vainly hoping she’ll call.
When my phone does ring, it doesn’t permeate my fog at first that it’s not Lexi’s ringtone and I jump and grab for it. It falls off my thigh to the floor, and in my haste to lunge for it, I slosh half my scotch over my stomach and crotch.
“Fuck,” I mutter as I put the glass on the coffee table and nab my phone from the carpet. I don’t recognize the number but I answer it anyway. “Hello?”
“It’s Gray,” I hear, and my blood turns to ice at the unmistakable panic in her voice.
“What’s happened?” I ask, because I inherently know that Gray calling me with fear in her voice means something is terribly wrong with Lexi.
“She got in an accident on her way home,” she says, her voice quavering. “The police just called Dad. Apparently a drunk driver ran a red light and T-boned her.”
“Is she okay?” I ask as I fly off the couch, my voice almost paralyzed by terror.
“I don’t know,” she says, then sniffs loudly so I know she’s crying. “She’s been taken to WakeMed. I’m on my way there now. So is Dad and Georgia. Ryker’s staying home with the girls.”
“Okay,” I say as I look wildly around my dark living room, trying to collect my thoughts. “I’m on my way. I’ll see you there.”
“Okay,” she says softly and disconnects.
For just a moment, I’m at a loss as to what to do. I know logically I need to get to the hospital, but in my panic, I can’t seem to reason how to go about doing it. All I can imagine is the worst, that Lexi’s dying or dead, and I didn’t get a chance to make this better. I didn’t get a chance to let her know how I truly feel about her, not just with words, but through the actions she so desperately needed.
Finally, my common sense seems to kick in and I vault from my couch, head in to the kitchen to swipe my keys off the counter. I barrel past the laundry room and into the garage, slapping at the button on the wall to raise the rolling door. I manage to at least take a deep breath in a piss-poor attempt to try to calm my nerves, and I tell myself to get my shit together before I get into my car.
—
The sliding doors to the emergency room open and I immediately spot Gray standing in a corner, both arms crossed protectively over her belly. Fuck, she better not be going into labor.
She locks eyes with me as soon as I step inside and crosses over to me quickly. My heart slams inside my chest as I see how ravaged her face is with worry, and for the first time ever, I see myself in Gray and realize that I have everything in common with her.