No, you’re not! She wanted to shout and stomp and rail at him for having such a low, distorted opinion of himself, but she held back. Encouraging him would be a mistake because if he saw a crack in her resolve, he’d hammer away at it until she broke. She couldn’t allow it. Someday soon, when this was over, she would break. That eventuality couldn’t be avoided, but she could put it off. She could do it without him watching, dying to pick up her pieces.
He stepped under the spray, letting the water course down his chest, abdomen, legs. She waited for him to move the shower curtain back into place, but he didn’t, giving her an up close view of him showering, lathering soap in his hands and scrubbing the blood from his face and neck. Moving lower to give attention to the cut muscles of his chest, soapy water flowing in patterns between the hard ridges. She tried to watch with the professional detachment of her past nurse self, but it failed miserably, slick heat settling between her legs instead. It was turning him on. Whatever he saw on her face, he liked it. He liked her witnessing this private ritual; she could see the excitement in his heavy-lidded gaze. Trying to maintain an impassive expression, she watched him move lower, lower, until he reached his aroused length. Until now, she’d kept herself from staring, but when he took it in his hand, she could no longer avoid looking. His eyes challenged her to look away as he braced a hand on the shower wall and started stroking himself.
“I might be bad for you, but I make you feel good, don’t I, baby?”
Inside her bra, her nipples puckered so tight, she knew they were visible against her tank top. Her palms itched to run up her thighs, over her belly, to end at her breasts. She wanted to squeeze the sensitive buds, feel the answering tug between her legs.
He bit down on his bottom lip and hummed in his throat. “Tell you what I’m thinking about right now. I’m thinking about the way you leaned back last night and bucked those hips like a fucking pro.” His eyes closed on a groan. “I have no idea how I held back so long…
needed to come so bad inside my tight girl.”
She shot her hand out to brace herself on the sink. His growled words were making her knees shake right along with her willpower. “Stop,” she whispered, but could barely hear herself over the pounding shower spray. Her body willed her to climb into the shower and let him take her, hard enough to shake the memories of this morning loose.
“It’s a good thing we wore that condom, Sera. It might have been the only thing keeping you off your back.”
His hand worked faster over his rigid flesh. “You know what I’m thinking about now, don’t you? No barriers. Just me, buried deep and fucking you hard.
I’d block those screams with my mouth until they had nowhere to go and you’d just have to work your motherfucking hips faster to make up for it. I saw you, baby. I saw how dirty you’d let me give it to you.”
Her back hit the wall, chest rising and falling with shallow breaths. The urge to touch herself had never been so strong. It nearly overwhelmed her. She closed her eyes to block his image before she lost control, forgot why she’d decided to resist him in the first place. When the shower spray shut off, panic loomed.
She heard him climb out, his wet footsteps stopping right in front of her.
So close. Too close. Resolutely, she kept her eyes squeezed tightly shut, even as his body heat enveloped her, the fresh scent of his soap invaded her head.
Above everything, she heard the slap of his hand working his erection, his raspy moans driving her toward insanity.
“That’s how it’s going to be, baby?
You want it, but you’re not going to take it?” Against her lips, she felt his tongue, licking slowly, sensually, across the slightly parted seam of her mouth.
Nothing could stop her head from tipping back, seeking more contact. Damp air kissed her belly, telling her he’d lifted her shirt to bare her midriff. Smooth, wet flesh dragged over her belly and his uneven groan told her it had been his hard arousal. The hand holding the sink to keep her steady shook with the effort.
Never in her life had she wanted anything more than she wanted Bowen in that moment. She wanted to climb his body and let him sink deep inside her, turning his words into reality. Just when she thought she would cave to the desire, he drew his lower body away from her.
“You want to call this a win when we’re both aching for it? That’s just fine, Sera.” His mouth grazed her ear. “Just remember one thing. No matter what happens or where you go, I had you first.
I took up every tight inch of you. I watched you get off while you called me your man. Nothing, nothing, will ever change that. You might not want me, but I’ll be your man until I die.”