But I don’t, and I’m not. Because I love him, and love is blind. My heart beats wildly, the rest of my body warming as hot as my cheeks when I realize I just silently said I loved Zeek. Raising my hand, I rub at my chest, rising and falling rapidly as my breathing becomes harsh. I love Zeek, a killer, a ruthless animal. One who is just in the other room chopping up a body, covered head to toe in someone else’s blood. That is the man I fell in love with.
“Here, you might want this.” Looking up, Machete places a glass of wine on my coffee table. His hair is so red, his stubble matching.
He sits next to me, taking me by surprise.
“I’m guessing this kind of thing is new to you?”
Accepting the glass, I take a large sip, swallowing my feelings and thoughts. Love, shock, fear.
Looking over the rim of the glass, Machete stares at me, waiting for a response.
“You could say that. I’m used to dead bodies, but dead ones in my kitchen? That’s a new one.”
“He’s rough around the edges, but he must feel something deep for you. ‘Cause he wouldn’t be with you, otherwise.”
I take another sip, not sure what to say.
“He saved me. Gave me a home when I didn’t have one. Well, I had one. I had in-laws of that cheating cunt. They didn’t count, though. I didn’t see what I was missing out on until Zeek found me.” He pats my back, and I still. “Don’t hurt him.” His words come out rough, his eyes narrowed with a dark promise that if I fuck up, I’ll pay. My lungs cease to function.
“Anyway…” He looks at the TV, nodding toward it. “You might want to turn that on.” His tone is back to nice and casual.
I don’t move.
I watch as he flips my TV on and steps toward the kitchen.
“Nice chat.”
During the next thirty minutes, I can hear sounds I’ll never get out of my head. Sounds I’d only heard in scary movies, ones that seemed very much accurate, till now.
The way a blade hacks into bone. It’s something that will haunt me forever.
I down my glass of wine and quickly ask Zeek for another.
“Here, take the bottle.” He places it on the table, his hand in a tight latex glove, with blood smeared from his fingertips to his elbow.
I nod, and don’t look up any further.
The boys carry duffle bags out of the kitchen. Moments, later the smell of bleach strong.
Me? I’m well on my way to drunk, my sanity out the fucking window.
“Doctor’s here,” Machete announces, heading back into my house with a cigarette hanging from his mouth. Normally, I’d tell him there’s no smoking in here, but considering the things that have happened the last few hours… smoke is the least of my worries.
“Dr. Stein,” Zeek greets. “I need you to look at her neck for me, please.”
“Why, yes, of course, Zeek.”
A man with short brown hair sits on my coffee table. “Let’s see what we have here.” He sets a white doctor bag on the floor. He fingers my chin, his hands cold as ice. Pushing my chin upwards, he looks over the cut.
“It’s a pretty good cut, but it won’t need stitches. We’ll use a butterfly on it, and it’ll close it up nicely.”
He cleans it, which stings like a bitch, his tongue sliding back and forth over his bottom lip as he works. He then places the butterfly over it, pulling it closed. It’s very uncomfortable, to say the least.
“If it doesn’t stop bleeding, please call me. We might have to do stiches. Will you require any pain meds?” He pulls out a booklet.
“That won’t be necessary.”
“Does she need it?” Zeek cuts in, standing behind the couch.
“Well, it could get uncomfortable in the next day or so. I would try some pain reliever, but if she thinks she’s okay then so be it. If it doesn’t work, though, you know where to find me.” Dr. Stein nods at Zeek then closes his bag and stands.
“Thank you for coming.” Zeek hands him a stack of cash, and my mouth pops open. “I need there to be complete discretion when it comes to this house call.” Zeek doesn’t ask, his tone of voice demands it.
“Yes, of course.” Dr. Stein takes the cash, and steps out.
Closing the door, Zeek blows out a tired breath.
“Where are the guys?”
“They cleaned up and left.” Huh, I didn’t even hear them leave. “You okay?” Swallowing hard, I nod slowly then shake my head, tears spilling from my eyes like a waterfall.
“I’m angry.” My words take me by surprise.
“Angry?”
I nod, my heart fluttering in my chest like a trapped bird.
“Angry ‘cause after seeing what I have the last few hours, I should hate you, be scared or mortified.” He steps to me, and I have to look up. “But I don’t, not even a little bit. I-I’m…” I stutter then stop, scared of the words that are about to slip from my mouth. Horrified the words hit me so hard, and that they are true.
“I’m fucking insane!” I sob. “We barely even know each other, but I love you.” I shrug, tears spilling onto my lips.
He grabs my hand, pulling me up as I continue. “I was raised and trained to live by the code of the law. Yet, the things I was just a part of…” I pause, wiping my face and looking for the right words. “I’m not scared of what just happened. I’m scared because what just happened doesn’t affect me like it should.”
“You don’t realize the savage acts you’re capable of until you are backed into a corner. You just have to broaden your outlook on what’s right and wrong to find your place.”