Yet, I knew I had to. Carly wasn’t safe with me, never was. I had no business showing up on her doorstep and involving her in my fucked up world.
If I hadn’t been so fucking selfish, I thought. It wouldn’t have come to this. I could’ve just given Anonymous the video and let them have at it. They would’ve released it eventually.
But what was done, was done.
Now I just needed to separate myself from Carly — to keep her safe.
I walked over to the front door and placed my hand on the knob. If I left right now while Carly was in her room, it would make things much easier. She’d come out later and I’d be gone. No arguing. No yelling and screaming at each other. Just gone.
I turned the knob and was hit by a sudden weight on my chest. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. If I left without saying goodbye, Carly wouldn’t forgive me a second time.
I glanced outside the living room window. It was pitch black outside and I was feeling a bit tired from the day’s events. It didn’t seem like a good idea to leave in the dead of night just so I could escape having to deal with facing her.
I’ll just leave in the morning, I decided. I’ll say my goodbyes and then be on my way.
Hoping I wasn’t making a mistake, I walked back over to the couch and laid down, my mind racing.
Besides Carly’s safety, there was another reason why I wanted to leave — I was losing control. My mind and body were becoming overwhelmed with lust and desire.
The sight of Carly bent over in those little shorts?
My cock immediately stiffened in my jeans at the memory, stretching the fabric as far as it’d go.
I’d come so close to taking her it wasn’t even funny. And it’d taken every ounce of my infamous Razor-like focus to hold back my impulses.
I wonder if she knew how close she’d come to being ravaged by a savage beast that would have left her gasping for breath and wanting for more.
Oh she knew, I thought, taunting me with her tight little ass.
It made me wonder if she was still a virgin. I thought she was, but with the sensual way she moved her body, I had my doubts.
Of course she isn’t, I thought. Why should she save herself for me when I ditched her? And I’m about to do it again . . .
When we lived under the same roof, I dropped little hints and compliments, but Carly never seemed to ‘get it’. And if she did, she sure as hell didn’t act on it. After a while, I gave up trying. I was too chicken shit to tell her my true feelings, it just wasn’t my style. So I settled for fucking random sluts instead to attempt to fill the bottomless hole inside of me.
Knowing that she hadn’t saved herself for me made me wish I’d stuck around to protect her from whatever prick took her innocence away. It made me wish that I’d told her how I truly felt instead of leaving.
It made me wish . . . that I could have her right now.
The urge to walk up to her room, break down the door and fuck the angry out of her was a powerful one. But I had to resist it. I had to fight. I couldn’t let my desire rule me.
I tried to close my eyes and concentrate on going to sleep. My eyes popped open a second later. “This isn’t going to work,” I muttered.
I got up from the couch and walked over to the kitchen, searching the cabinets until I found a zip lock bag. I opened the freezer and grabbed a handful of ice and threw it inside before zipping it back up.
I walked back over to the couch and laid back down. Pressing the icepack against my balls, I let out a deep sigh and thought, this is going to be a long night.
Chapter 14
Carly
I woke up the next morning to the smell of eggs and bacon. I’m not sure if it was because that was a routine of Mason’s, or because there was a lack of options in my kitchen. I had no idea how long I’d slept or what time it was. All I remembered from the previous night was storming into my room, throwing myself face down into my pillow and crying my eyes out until sleep took me.
After stretching, I made my way into the kitchen and my mouth went dry. Mason was standing at the stove, shirtless, scrambling eggs. I should’ve been pissed off at the sight of him after how he treated me the night before, but his being shirtless washed my anger away, reminding me of the desire I’d felt for him.
He looked more mouth-watering than the delicious food he was cooking. I could definitely learn to appreciate waking up to a sight like that every morning.
“Seriously?” I demanded, trying to sound pissed off and failing.
Mason looked up at me as he scrambled an egg and grinned. I swear his adorable dimples gave me life. “What?”
I folded my arms across my breasts. “You treat me like shit last night and now you’re making me breakfast?”
His smile dimmed somewhat. “Oh. That.”
I glowered. But it was hard to look pissed when I couldn’t keep my eyes off of his torso. He had such perfect definition.
“Yes, that.”