Preston's Honor

I was happy to be busy, and relieved to be helping around the house. And I was also thankful to be so tired every day that I barely had the strength to miss Preston.

Both boys were working on their family farm that last summer and would leave in August for college on the East Coast. My heart pinched whenever I thought about it, even though I hadn’t seen Cole since school ended and hadn’t seen Preston since that night when we’d danced under the lights of the Laundromat.

Just the thought of them being so far away caused grief to well up in my throat. They’d been a constant in my world, seemingly all my life. I couldn’t remember a time when their twin smiles hadn’t been waiting for me right up the road, even if I went months and months without seeing them.

Cole surprised me one evening as I was leaving work. I laughed when he stepped in front of me, grinning and almost causing me to trip over my own feet.

“Hi,” I breathed, joy rising within at his familiar face. “What are you doing here?”

He grinned. “One of my friends mentioned he saw you working here.”

I nodded. “Just for a month now.”

“I’ve missed you. You’re a hard person to pin down, Annalia Del Valle.”

I laughed softly. “Right, because so many are trying . . . to . . . pin me down.”

“I am. I’m trying to pin you down.” His eyes were searching and I looked away on a laugh, feeling slightly awkward.

“I thought we’d see more of each other this year with going to the same school, but we really didn’t, did we?”

I shrugged, knowing it was my fault. I’d avoided them there. And the bedbug incident, as I referred to it now in my mind, had been proof that I’d been right to do so. “You were seniors this year. I was just a freshman. Our paths just didn’t cross much.”

He smiled. “Hmm. Well, here we are tonight, our paths crossing. I thought you might need an escort home.”

Nerves prickled. Preston had seen my house, and I hadn’t liked it. I didn’t want to repeat the experience with Cole. I turned back toward the door when I heard Cathy—my coworker and the girl who usually gave me a lift home—exiting behind me. “I’ve got an escort tonight, Cathy.”

Cathy grinned and waved as she turned in the direction of her car. I turned back to Cole. “Where’s your truck?”

“Preston has it tonight.”

I cleared my throat, refusing to think about where Preston might be. Or namely who Preston might be with. I nodded. “You can walk me to my turnoff.”

His eyes lingered on me for a moment but then he nodded. “All right.” We walked in silence for a few minutes before he asked, “Are you really okay? After what—”

“I’m fine.” My cheeks colored and I was glad for the dim outside lighting. I didn’t want to talk about the incident—it still mortified me.

He looked thoughtful for a moment before he put his hands in his pockets and glanced up at the moon. He seemed especially pensive tonight and reminded me of his brother. “Are you okay?”

It was still strange spending time with Cole without Preston there. I was so aware of his absence—probably even more so than if I’d been completely alone. Although it was funny because I hadn’t felt that way when I’d spent time with just Preston.

“Yeah, I’m fine. We’re, uh . . . we’re leaving in a couple of days.”

I stopped and turned to him, startled. “A couple of days? I thought you were leaving mid-August?”

He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. “Our dorm opened up earlier than we were originally told it would, and Preston thought it’d be good to get out there and look for jobs before school started.”

My heart sank. “Oh. Jobs. Right . . .” I licked my lips, a sense of panic filling my chest. I blinked at him. “You’re here to say goodbye.”

He nodded and it was the first time I thought I’d seen an expression of sadness etched into the lines of Cole’s handsome face. “Yeah.” He looked off into the distance for a moment before meeting my gaze again. “I could have borrowed my dad’s truck tonight but I kind of just wanted to walk. I’ve been walking through town, just . . . remembering. Feels so strange to know I’m going to wake up somewhere other than here for the next four years.”

I took a deep, calming breath. Despite my sadness, I was happy for them. “You’re finally getting out of here,” I said, offering him a weak smile, the only one I could muster at the moment.

He smiled back and took my hand as we started walking again, giving it a squeeze. “I’m going to miss this place,” he said, grinning wider.

I tilted my head and looked at him sideways. “Yeah? Where are you gonna be?”

“In a college classroom, gettin’ myself educated.”

I laughed softly, squeezing his hand back. I was happy for Cole, truly and deeply. This time the joke we’d always laughed about wasn’t a joke at all, but reality.

We turned out of town and started walking slowly down the dirt road that led to his house and the turnoff for the road to mine.

The luminous moon cast a glow on the miles of farmland stretched to either side of us, the hills in the distance a dark outline against the indigo sky. “Are you going to miss it here at all?”

He shrugged. “I’m going to miss you.”

I smiled. “I’m going to miss you, too. This town is going to seem so much smaller when you’re gone.”

“Without my larger-than-life personality?”

I laughed softly. “Yeah, actually.”

We walked in companionable silence for several minutes and before I knew it, we’d reached the dirt road that separated us in more ways than one.

“Here we are,” I said softly, feeling a sudden overwhelming sadness. This was goodbye. I had no idea if this was goodbye forever, if he would go off to college and forget all about me, or if I really meant more to him. I wasn’t na?ve about the parties and girls college would offer him. And Preston.

Cole turned to me and took me in his arms, lowering his mouth to mine. He pulled me close and kissed me deeply, his tongue twisting with mine. I tried to lose myself in the kiss but only felt half-involved. It was the last physical contact I’d get for a long time, possibly forever, though I refused to consider that dismal possibility too closely.

When we parted, he smiled and looked at me for several moments, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. I couldn’t make out his exact expression in the dimness of the night but it looked thoughtful, and for a moment, I wondered if he was going to make note of there not being a spark between us. “I know we barely got started, Lia, but wait for me.”

I tilted my head, our bodies still pressed together. “Wait for you . . .” I repeated, surprised. My thoughts had been going in such an opposite direction.

“Don’t give yourself to someone else.”