Porn Star

Devi giggles, and then I hear an older woman say, “Boombalee!”

It’s not precisely English—or any other language I know—and I wonder if it’s psychic-speak for something important, or if maybe this woman is speaking in tongues or having a stroke, but then she pushes past the beads separating the inner space from the waiting room and scurries toward Devi, arms outstretched.

“Oh, shit,” Devi mutters, looking at me with something akin to panic. “I’m so sorry about this.”

“Sorry about what?”

But she can’t talk now because the woman has pulled her up from her chair and wrapped her in a massive hug. She’s in her late forties, with thick gray-blond hair tied back in a utilitarian braid, and a petite but willowy build. She’s wearing a long skirt and blouse that have an unmistakable “Sedona, Arizona” vibe. For a minute, I think she’s the psychic but then she pulls back and I say aloud, “Holy shit.”

They both turn to look at me beamingly, and it’s so apparent now that I feel retroactively stupid for not having seen it before. The woman looks exactly like Devi, but without the Persian coloring. The same high cheekbones and pointed chin, the same heart-shaped faces with identical, beautiful smiles.

It’s Devi’s mom.

I stick out my hand. “Logan O’Toole. Nice to meet you.”

“Sue Jones-Daryani. What brings you to Madam Psuka’s today? And how come I haven’t seen you in over a week, Boombalee? I miss you.”

“Mom,” Devi says, a little embarrassed. “I’ve been busy. And don’t call me that in public!”

“Boombalee? Devi, I labored for twenty-seven hours with no medication to bring you into this world, and when you came out, you tore my—”

“Mom!” Devi looks seriously alarmed now. “Can you not in front of my colleague?”

“My point is, I’ll call you whatever I want.” Her gray eyes fall back to me and she softens. “It’s nice to meet you, Logan. Are you making pornography with my daughter?”

I can’t help but laugh. “Yes, ma’am. I am.”

“I’m glad to hear it. You have very virile energy, you know. I can feel the pulsing of your sacral chakra from here.”

“Uh...is that something I should get checked out by a doctor?”

Sue tuts at me in just the same way that Devi tutted at me earlier and reaches behind me, pressing her palm against the very top part of my ass. Beside me, Devi makes the kind of groan someone would make if they were willing themselves to die, and when I look over, she’s got her face buried in her hands in mortification.

I, however, am having a great time.

“Ms. Jones-Dayrani, you’re trying to seduce me, aren’t you?” I tease as she gives my chakra a few extra pats for good measure.

“Young man, I’ve never had to seduce a single sexual partner in my life, and I’m certain that you’ve never needed to either.”

I give a modest half-shrug.

“Mom, can you please get your hand off Logan’s ass now?”

Sue sighs, as if her daughter is the biggest prude in the world. “Devi, your sacral chakra, on the other hand, is completely blocked. And something’s going on with your heart chakra.” She frowns. “We need to do some Reiki, or maybe you should see Dr. Tammaro for acupuncture. But in the meantime, I recommend some meditation and maybe some vigorous sex to unblock that chakra.”

“I’d be happy to help your daughter with that, ma’am,” I chime in with a wide grin.

Devi’s hands are still on her face. “Isn’t there like a midwifery conference or something that you need to be at?”

“Actually, your father and I have hot yoga class, so I should be off. But you need to come over this week for dinner sometime. We just got a whole box of manioc roots from our co-op and we’ll need help eating them all.”

“Okay,” Devi says with the exact level of excitement you’d expect from someone agreeing to eat manioc root. “I’ll call you.”

Sue gives her a big hug, and then leans in to kiss my cheek. “Honor her,” is the firm intonation she delivers in my ear, but the sternness is softened by the affectionate caress she gives my sacral chakra. And then she opens the door and leaves the shop.

“I am so sorry,” Devi groans as she throws herself into a nearby chair. “I knew about this place because my mother comes here, but I had no idea she would be in today, and I am so, so embarrassed right now.”

“Why?” I don’t sit. I stand in front of her and nudge her knees with my own. “I thought she was great. More than great; she’s awesome. Just like you.”

Devi lifts her eyes to mine. “Really? You don’t hate me now that you’ve met my wack-a-doo mom?”

“The exact opposite. The more I learn about you, the more I want to know.” The more I fall in love with you.

I don’t say that, obviously.

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