“I need them,” I whimpered. “Topia can’t save me, only … them.”
Razi was back in Rau’s face again, albeit looking a little more respectful. “Sir, this is a bad idea. You don’t have a Beta, you can’t go against the five brothers. They draw power from two powerful Originals. You need to think this through.”
Before I could add my agreement to that statement, Rau reached forward and touched my chest. I flinched back, but somehow couldn’t move away from the hand pressed right above my sternum. The pain in my chest started to ebb away, taking with it a lot of the other pain.
“I can temporarily block the pain so that you can make it to Topia, and once we are there we can figure out what is happening to you.” He was far too close for comfort, even if he was easing the agony. He leaned his face into mine, his voice lowering to a murmur. “You have no choice here, this hold will not last long, and you need more than Abil’s sons.”
He was lying. I could feel it, but his threats were still fresh in mind. I couldn’t risk the safety of the Abcurses; the gods had no afterlife, and Razi had been right when he said they were weakened. The thought of Rau hurting them …
“I will come with you as long as neither of you touch me again.” I straightened and gave them my best Coen stare.
“Deal.” Rau swept his arm out to indicate that I should go first.
My legs were still weak as I stumbled along, somehow keeping my footing. This time if I face-planted, there would be no one to scoop me up. I was on my own. Well, I was with two crazy gods who were taking me into the world of the gods—but that definitely wasn’t making me feel any less alone.
The journey out of the building, across the grass and toward the backside of Blesswood went far too quickly. I was just about to head in the direction of the arena, since we’d have to walk past it to get to the forest, when Rau let out a bark of laughter.
“Where are you going?” he asked me. “I thought you knew the way.”
I immediately started cursing him in my head, until his laughter interrupted again.
“I think it’s time I showed you the way a god enters his domain.” He was shaking his head as he spoke, as though saying about time.
Which was … beyond ridiculous. Since when was I supposed to know the proper way for a god to enter his domain? Now it was my turn to laugh.
“I’m not a god, and I don’t care.” I stopped moving altogether. “You can save your bragging for the next dweller you kidnap and turn into a Jeffrey.”
“What the hell was that supposed to mean?” he snapped at Razi.
The Envy Beta just shook his head, before crossing his arms over his chest. Both of them wore the same looks that I had been seeing most of my life, usually on my mother’s or Emmy’s faces. Like they just weren’t sure what to do with me—and how could I possibly be this annoying every single sun-cycle?
Before I could say anything more, I was being steered in a completely different direction. Rau was being extra careful to not quite touch me, as per my wishes, but it didn’t make me want to punch him any less. We passed into another building and the ache in my chest crushed me again for a beat as I thought about the Abcurses back in the dining hall, before Rau’s magic kicked into gear again, wiping out most of the pain.
I was so caught up in worry for the Abcurses, that I didn’t realise we had come to a stop. In front of the temple. Or to be more specific, in front of the statue of Staviti, which dominated the front of the temple.
“I hope you can keep a secret,” Rau said, “Staviti does not like you lowly beings knowing more than they should. When they know things, they start getting ideas, and thinking for themselves, and then we have too much chaos.”
Razi snorted. “And we all know how he feels about chaos.”
His laughter was cut off by a single glare from Rau.
“So,” the Chaos god focussed on me again, “you’re about to discover another entrance, not that you could activate it, but still … knowledge is power and I am trusting you with this secret.”
“You do realise I don’t care, right? I don’t want to be a god! I don’t want to visit Topia! I don’t want anything to do with you!” I might have been shouting at this point, but I was seriously done.
I had strong feelings for the Abcurses, it was a fact, I needed each one of them. I needed Siret’s grin, Aros’s heat, Coen’s hardness, Rome’s gruffness, and Yael’s stubbornness … but … there was no denying they had brought a level of crazy into my world that was just too much for me to handle. It never stopped, and I was reaching my limit.
Without thought, I kicked out at Rau, and since neither of us had been expecting the sudden explosion of movement, it actually connected. He flew back a few yards, which had me staring wide-eyed and slack-jawed after him. How … what … what just happened? It was like the time I had kicked the couch: the same unnatural, inexplicable burst of strength. Still, the charcoal powder didn’t reveal any sol gift. I shouldn’t have been having any random bursts of anything. Could it be the Abcurses? Was it our connection, somehow feeding me their power at times? Or was the charcoal powder just slow to work?
Either way, it freaked me out, and by the time I recovered, Rau was already back in front of me, his dark features creased in lines of absolute fury.
“You dare to strike a god!”
Before I could even lift my hands to explain, his fist crashed into my face. Darkness descended over my vision and my head went fuzzy for the second time that night. I got my hands up in time to stop the second hit, but he was just too strong. My hands were crushed between his fists and my face. I dropped to my knees, still fighting unconsciousness. If I passed out, he could do whatever he wanted to me. I tried to draw on that strength again, striking out blindly as I couldn’t even open my eyes to see what was happening, but a third hit had everything going black.
Consciousness drifted in slowly, and with it came the pain. Not just in my head, but through my entire body. I groaned, realising that whatever Rau had done to dull the ache in my chest had worn off. My gut was okay, but the part of me that was somehow attached to the Abcurses was definitely hurting again. The main pain from my gut—from what Rau had called a metamorphosis—had disappeared completely.