Coen and Rome were waiting for us just outside of the arena. Both of them looked their usual giant, unfazed selves. If I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes, I would never have suspected that they had just been in the arena. They looked relaxed and fresh. I looked like a bag of crap.
Without a word, the five Abcurses fell into step, and I followed their lead. After we crossed the grassed area, I realised we were heading back toward their rooms, which was … a bit surprising. Finally, when I couldn’t take it any longer, the questions began to burst out of me.
“Are we really going to this stupid dance? With the freaking gods? Surely that doesn’t seem like a good idea to you guys. I mean, I almost die regularly, but I don’t think you’re all as comfortable with dying as I am. Actually, where do gods go when they die? Is there like another Topia … a world beyond the gods? A Level One for Minatsol, a Level Two for Topia, and a Level Three for only the dead immortals?”
I was rambling again, hoping that something I said would penetrate their stubborn, overly thick skulls. We were halfway down the hall now, close to Coen’s room.
“Dead immortals?” Rome asked. He didn’t answer my questions, which had my blood boiling. I hated to be ignored. It made me feel worthless. Useless.
“You’re not worthless or useless,” Aros growled. “We just don’t like to discuss our family business out in the open. The gods have spies everywhere. We’re always being watched, Willa.”
“And we’ve already said too much in public,” Yael added.
My head snapped from side to side as I tried to see everything around me, all at the same time. A few dwellers were scurrying around, pushing their carts. One of two sols lingered further down the hall, leaning against a doorway. But no one seemed to be paying any attention to us.
“Remember the jewelled bug,” Siret said close to my ear. “Spies don’t generally stand right behind you in dark clothing, holding magnifying eye-glasses.”
I let out a huff of air. “Would make life a hell of a lot easier if they did.” I could feel the heat in my cheeks; I was always looking like an idiot in front of the Abcurses.
I was sure that it would eventually start annoying them, but for now at least … they were stuck with me. As we reached Coen’s door, I expected that we would march inside, but instead my arm was captured and then we were moving again—toward the shower room.
“You and I have mud in places that mud should never be,” Siret said, his trademark grin in place. “Gotta look pretty for the gods.”
I knew my face was creased into a deep frown now. I could feel the bunching of my brows and the puffing of my cheeks. “I still don’t understand why we’re going.”
Yael shot me a look, before pushing open the door to the bathing chamber. Stepping inside, my eyes adjusted to the darkness quickly and … I let out a little squeal, before covering my face. There were a bunch of naked sols milling around the front room. I mean, I had no problem with nakedness—that would be a little hypocritical of me if I did, but still … there was so much skin and guy things on show. Which made sense: this was the male wing after all. No one expected good ol’ Will Knight to rock up with boobs.
I had no idea what the Abcurses did in the next half a click, but somehow or other, the room emptied out. I could almost smell the fear pouring off the sols as they rushed from the chamber.
“You can open your eyes now, Rocks.” Coen was the one to speak, but my eyes were drawn to the way the five of them lined up across from me, blocking the doorway.
When they stood together like that, all of them focusing on me, it was almost too much for my poor dweller brain to handle. It started short-circuiting, random words emerging from my mouth.
“So … penises, right? I mean … just wow, so many penises. What would a girl even do with that many penises together in one place?” Shut up Willa. What the hell is wrong with you?
There was a beat of silence and then suddenly the room was filled with laughter. Full bellied, hold-yourself-up-on-your-knees, can’t-breathe-or-talk kind of laughter. Meanwhile, I remained locked down, red-faced, unable to figure out where my very obvious issues stemmed from.
Coen, who had somehow limited himself to a single chuckle, broke away from his brothers and moved across to stand before me. I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. I needed a moment to try and contain my embarrassment. Large hands cupped my face, and I found myself staring into his eyes—eyes still glimmering with humour.
“When a god dies, there’s no other world for them to move on to,” he told me. “Our vessels cease to exist, and our power is transferred to whichever god takes our place.”
His plan to distract me worked, but instead of embarrassment, I was now filled with dread. “You cease to exist? There’s no afterlife for you?” I shook my head a few times as I started muttering. “No, that’s not okay with me. I need to know that even when I’m a Jeffrey, you guys will be somewhere around. You can visit me and stuff.”
He wrapped his hands around my biceps and pulled me closer to him. “We’re very hard to kill, Rocks. You’re worrying for nothing. And you’ll never be a Jeffrey.”
Yael laughed from behind him. “Yeah, that name’s already taken. You might be a John.”
I tilted my body to the side and glared as hard as I could. Yael gave me a wink, and with a sigh I shook myself free from Coen. I needed to stand on my own. Of course, my stupid soul disagreed with this and my heart starting aching in a way that felt like it was trying to burst out of my chest.
Trying not to let the worries drown me, I stepped up to the first room, my hands automatically going for my shirt.
“Whoa, hang on there, Soldier. You know the rule about nudity.” Siret had both hands up in front of him, as though he could actually fend off my nakedness like that.
I levelled my most intense glare on each of them. “Since you all insist on going to this dance, something I have made my own objection to very clear, then I need to be clean. So either wait outside, or deal with the boobs. Okay?”
They chose to avert their eyes as I started to undress, although I could’ve sworn that Siret hadn’t taken his off me at all. I decided to keep my underwear on, mostly because I really didn’t want to create a problem. “You can all look now, I’m still mostly clothed.” If you counted the black underwear-creation of Siret’s.
Aros immediately drew my attention, because his eyes were so dark they almost appeared bronze. The heat from our kiss filled the space between us, and the need to cross over to him flared within me. It felt as though someone had attached a string to my chest and was pulling me closer and closer to him with each breath that rattled through me. With a shake of my head I turned away, somehow managing to stop myself from moving. It was hard though—I had to breathe deeply in and out to stop the torrent of need that was trying to engulf me.