I step inside, the scent of all that is Kane permeating the air around me, assaulting my senses in a rush of woodsy-like freshness. The pure rush of it causes my body to physically shudder. I take a deep breath and close my eyes, savoring the alluring scent.
When I open my eyes again, he’s staring at me with an expression of pure rapture. Me, Willow Tate—as if I’m a meal he can’t wait to devour. A drink he’s been craving after years lost in the desert. Like I’m the only thing he can see, and at this moment, I believe him.
“You all right over there?” His voice vibrates through my body, and I gesture with a nod of affirmation. “Do you want to talk before we leave?”
“We probably should. Or we can talk wherever we’re going. Which is where?”
“I’m staying at a friend’s house while we’re filming here. Not too far from my own house, the one you’re in, but it will allow us the privacy we need.”
He turns away with a wink and grabs some paperwork off the table, his phone, and tablet, and places them in a messenger-type bag.
“Hey,” I call, and he turns to give me his attention. “Why are we staying in your house, and you’re staying somewhere else? Wouldn’t it be easier for you to have just put us up somewhere? A hotel even?”
His eyes shine brightly. At this moment, his handsome face looks less roughly rugged and more youthful in his enjoyment. “Because, Willow, I love knowing that you’re in my bed.” He bends down, his full lips firing the nerves in my own when they press against me briefly before lifting away just enough for his lips to dance over mine as he continues to speak. “Easier it might have been, but I wouldn’t have been able to stop thinking about you no matter where you called your home away from home here. I can’t even tell you what it does to me when I think about your body wrapped in my sheets. How you walk across my room in the morning to get into my shower. And the image of your body, naked, in that shower while water runs over every inch of your skin … that definitely didn’t make it easier, but fuck if I don’t love knowing you’re there.”
“Oh … wow.” My breathy words come out quickly, and with his face so close to mine, I’m rewarded with watching his pupils dilate. He’s as turned on as I feel right now. I swallow thickly, the sound seeming to echo around us. “Wouldn’t … don’t … do you not want to be there with me … doing those things?”
His pupils grow even more until the bright blue of his eyes is almost completely covered. “Fuck, you can’t say that kind of stuff to me, Willow. I’m hanging on by a thread right now.”
“I know the feeling,” I tell him honestly.
“Don’t doubt that I wouldn’t rather be there with you, not for a second, but I know you wouldn’t have been ready for that without trusting me. I didn’t, and still don’t, want to push you for things you aren’t ready for. I guess, to answer your question, I was selfishly pleasuring myself while I waited for you to make the move and let me know you’re ready.”
“Kane?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“You make me crazy nervous.” The desire in his eyes dims slightly, and his head cocks slightly to the side in question, spurring me to continue. “Well, you don’t, but I’m … God, this is embarrassing.”
His hands come up and frame my face, moving in closer, but not touching me past his two warm hands. Comforting. Strong. Reassuring. But most importantly, not judging me.
“You know I have a lot of issues with how I see myself. It’s taken me a long while to get to where I am right now, standing in front of you and even telling you all of this. Bottom line, intimacy and fear run hand in hand with me. I’m so afraid, Kane, that deep down when you see me, all of me, you will be so unsatisfied because I’m not even close to the women you’re used to.” I rush the last of that out in a breath of words, and I would question whether he understood me except for the rapidness of his breathing and the slight flare of his nostrils.
“I won’t tell you again, Willow,” he starts, his voice a deadly calm. “Those women hold nothing to you. They aren’t the ones I want. You are. If I have to knock each and every one of those fears out of your mind, I’ll gladly do it if it means you understand, without a shadow of doubt, that when I look at you, I fucking love what I see.”
“And that, Kane, is what scares me the most. I’m not sure I’m going to be able to let it all go to get there, no matter how hard I want to.”
His eyes go soft. “Give me your hand then, Willow, and let me take you there.”
I follow Kane through the doorway and look around the entryway. What the heck am I doing? I can hear Kirby and her family laughing somewhere in the back of the house. I turn to look at Kane as he walks in behind me and give him a shaky smile.