“I’m numb,” I whispered. “To everything.”
Duke rose up and walked to the doorway. There was just inches between us. I blinked fast and a tear fell from my eye. Duke was there to catch it, spreading it across my cheek.
“There’s a million things I could say right now, Belle,” he said. “But none of it would matter or would be true. I hate that part of everything. And there’s a million things to say to your brother and none of that will matter or be true. It’s like staring down a river and you can’t stop flowing. What’s at the end? A little slide into a new current or a fucking waterfall?” Duke leaned in and gently kissed my lips. “Go upstairs and sleep, sweetie. I’ll be here.”
“All night?” I asked.
“I’m going to sit with him for a little bit. I have plenty of my own demons next to me. Why not add in the regret?”
“Duke…”
“Get some sleep. It’ll be okay. If anything happens, I’ll take care of it. I promise.”
I started to inch back but stopped. I grabbed tight to Duke’s leather cut. I moved up to my toes and planted a kiss to his lips. It felt good to steal one from him. Like I had some kind of power over him.
Not a chance in hell, Belle. He’s always had your number.
I went upstairs, changed, and climbed into bed. I had a long t-shirt on, panties, no bra. Who the hell sleeps in a bra? I figured I’d wake up to find Duke gone. Or sleeping on the couch.
I never thought in a million years I’d wake up with Duke in bed with me.
**
I was mid-dream when I felt something touch my face.
“Hey, sweetie, it’s me.”
I thought I was still dreaming. A dream I had quite a bit. One where Duke would show up, home from war, never changed, never leaving.
Then reality hit me and I remembered what had happened with Jim.
My eyes popped open and Duke’s face was right there.
“It’s okay,” Duke whispered.
“What time is it?” I asked.
“It’s late. Really late. Jim is fine. Okay? I just wanted to check on you before I take off.”
“Take off?” I asked. “Can you stay? See Jim in the morning?”
I saw the hesitation creep across Duke’s face. I propped myself up and wondered how much like crap I looked like. Messy bed hair. No makeup. Half asleep.
“Sweetie, I shouldn’t do that.”
“You can sleep on the couch. Or one of the bedrooms up here.”
“That’s the problem,” Duke said.
Our eyes locked and I knew what that meant. Together. So close. The flames of temptation already ignited. If he stayed…
I moved forward and kissed him. I was desperate, longing to be touched, loved, made to feel important.
“Stay,” I whispered, knowing that with one word I was sealing my fate for the night and beyond.
Duke was everything bad, just like before, only worse. He was vicious, brutal; he’d been shot and had shot people. Hell, he was a murderer in many different ways. But in that moment he was still my Duke. The man I loved. The man I still…
Duke kissed me back. He was on his knees, on the floor next to my bed. His left hand touched the back of my head, holding me there. This wasn’t about one quick kiss and ending it. This was going to go the distance.
Almost a year.
That’s what rang through my mind as Duke’s tongue cared for my mouth.
Almost a year since another man touched me. And even then… it wasn’t the same. Myself and Niles were so far on the outs, I was basically getting favors from him. He was long checked out and I honestly couldn’t blame him.
Duke touched the bottom of my shirt and lifted. His fingertips grazed the side of my panties and my body jumped. I let out a sigh, still kissing him. His mouth closed over mine again. He bumped into the bed, growling, his hand sliding up my shirt to my ribs. The sheer grip and strength of him was enough to get me off. Seriously. A man so powerful, a man who could handle any situation, even when I called him into the mess that slept downstairs.
As his hand moved up even more, I had to break the kiss. I felt like a virgin as I looked down, watching his hand climb over my left breast, under my shirt. That rough touch of his, cupping my warm and large breast. I sucked in a breath, shivering, my nipple became wildly hard. His fingers rolled over my nipples one at a time. But then kept going. His fingers poked through the top of my shirt. Up my neck, forcing my head back. My lips shuddered. I wasn’t sure whether to be turned on or maybe scared.
Duke took his hand from the back of my head and grabbed my shirt.
“Off, sweetie,” he ordered.
Using those outlaw hands of his, he took my shirt off. I then rested on my back, my breasts exposed, both nipples hard, trying to control my erratic breathing. It was so fucking hot to just be lying there in front of him like that.