“Never said you were.”
The sharpness to my tone abruptly quiets her. I think she’s done pushing, and that’s good enough for me. But as I pull onto the street that leads to Itsu’s, she says something I’m not ready to hear. “You know that police officer who was shot. I know you do. And, well, I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry he was hurt. And I’m truly sorry for what you’re going through.”
She keeps her voice gentle, and I can hear the honesty in her words. That doesn’t mean I say anything back. This thing with Joey is messing me up ten ways to Sunday—more than I want to admit, and more than I want anyone to know, especially her. But in not responding, it’s like I confirm all her suspicions. Well, fuck me.
My eyes cut to the rearview mirror. No one’s following us, which is good considering I’m not paying enough attention. Tess threw me for a loop in bringing up Joey, and it’s something I can’t allow. She may not be on the mob’s radar yet, but eventually she might be—just like my brother already is. I have to stay sharp. No matter what anyone says.
And I have to get over this shit with Joey.
I park directly beside Declan, shielding his side with my truck and Tess with the cinder-block wall. “Wait till I come get you,” I tell her.
In her silence, I wonder if she’s feeling sorry for me. I slam the door, hoping she’s not. Given the choice, I’d rather meet a scowl and a swinging fist than pity. Pity’s for pussies and those too weak to fight.
And hell will freeze before I go down like a punk.
The other badge opposite Declan’s ride rolls down his window. “How long’s your shift?” I ask him.
“Got another two. How long do you have?”
“Four more.” I adjust my gloves. “Did you eat?”
“Nah, but the wife’s got dinner waiting. I’ll cover the outside if you want to head in.”
I nod. “Thanks.”
“Hey, O’Brien,” the badge calls as I leave to get Tess.
“Yeah?”
He taps on the wheel as if mulling over his thoughts. “I’ll see you around,” he finally says.
He means well, but what he keeps to himself isn’t doing me any favors. It wasn’t long ago people gave it to me straight. Those were the days, man. Days I won’t easily get back.
Declan and Tess follow me into the restaurant. “Booth in the back, please,” I tell the waiter who greets us, flashing him my badge pinned inside my leather jacket.
His eyes widen. “Of course. This way, sir.”
I motion Tess and Declan forward. Like a seasoned pro, Declan spots the hostess, Sally, or Cindy or who gives a shit what her name is? In that too-tight dress, she’s all Declan needs. They exchange brief nods from across the room, where she’s seating an elderly couple.
Tess doesn’t seem to notice, but she does notice how abruptly he excuses himself soon after he finishes eating. “Is everything all right?”
He smiles politely, though his attention is toward the front door, where his date is already waiting. “Heavy case is all. I’ll probably spend the weekend working.”
Or in bed, I’m thinking.
“Would you like me to come over and help?” she asks him.
“No,” we both answer.
Deck narrows his eyes. A warning meant for me, which I answer with a stiff middle finger. Tess slaps her hands over mine and forces my hand against the table. “Behave,” she whispers. “We’re in public.”
“We’re also in South Philly,” I remind her.
Declan pulls on his coat and drops a few bills on the table. “Thank you for your help,” he tells Tess. “I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening.” To me he says, “Good night, Curran. Hope you can stay warm, in your car all alone.”