In this case, he’s dropping cash in exchange for future favors, and for the opportunity to have his daughter seen with a political juggernaut.
As I sit on the couch, the life Father has carefully devised for me plays out like a well-orchestrated movie script: I’ll graduate law school, only to marry some sleazy politician or renowned figure he selects for me. I’ll play the good wife, ignoring my husband’s indiscretions, raising our children with a plastic smile fixed on my face, only to be replaced by someone better and younger when I’m no longer of use. Precisely like my mother’s life had been.
Hmm. What’s that saying? Oh, yes. Fuck that.
Six more months, I remind myself. Just six more and you’re free.
That’s what I tell myself. But as I think about how little I fought and how easily he defeated me, I can no longer be sure. Jesus, will I ever be free of this man?
Curran
I spent the next few hours in the cold, listening to my scanner and to all the calls I wouldn’t respond to. Considering it was midweek, there was a lot of shit going down. Two domestic violence calls so far, five thefts, and six breaking-and-enterings.
I should be there, I tell myself, watching backs, throwing down, getting the bad guys.
But would any of the boys in blue want me there now? I scoff. Probably not.
There was a time when I’d show up to crazy shit, and even crazier felons. Relief would flood my boys’ faces—even vets years into the force seemed happy to see me.
“You’re a good cop, O’Brien.”
“Thank God you’re here, O’Brien.”
“Hell, ’bout time you got here, O’Brien.”
That’s what I’d hear, and that’s what I’d sense. I tried not to let it go to my head, and for the most part I didn’t, too caught up in what was happening.
Turns out, they gave me too much credit.
Turns out, they were dead wrong.
It’s a long and hard fall from the top. And that shit hurts when you land.
I adjust my position and glance up at Tess’s apartment. The lights flick off except for one, which casts a shadow along her living room. I watch her lean silhouette cross the length of the room and into her bedroom. She moves slowly, as if in deep thought. Maybe she’s thinking through what she studied and learned. That’s my guess, until she pauses by the window and looks out, before quickly rushing away.
I laugh to myself. She did the same thing earlier when I caught her checking me out. And damn it all, she hadn’t liked me calling her on it, had she? Her sweet ass probably paced all over her apartment, pissed I was onto her….
Oh, shit. I pass a hand over my face, muttering to myself, “Okay, asshole, exactly what are you doing here?”
“Fuck you. I’m here to get a report, dumbass.”
I grumble a swear. I don’t have to turn around to know Lu’s here, pissed, and has likely been eyeing me like a hawk. I glance at the clock. She’s early. Way early. Damn. Considering she’s two donuts shy of the big one, she moves like a shadow.
I hit the locks, allowing her into the passenger side. “What are you doing here, Lu? Your shift doesn’t start for another forty.”
She scrunches her small nose and gives me the once-over. “I’m here on account of you and me have a few things to cover.”
I straighten. “This about Joey?”
“Yup.” She waves me off when I start cursing. “Don’t get your thong in a bunch, O’Brien. The captain just wants me to check on you. See how you’re doin’.”
“I’m done talking. Did enough of it yesterday when Internal Affairs showed up.”
“Yeah, well, they’re just following procedure. Especially since the trial’s been moved up.”
“So I hear,” I mutter, knowing the county wants to get rid of this mess fast.
Lu taps the armrest, ignoring my scowl. “So, you gonna tell me how you are?”
“I’m fine.”
She stops drumming her fingers. “No, you’re not. You watched your rookie get shot to shit.”
“Don’t need reminding, Lu.”
She purses her lips and nods. “Actually, O’Brien, you sorta do. See, you and me, we kind of have this situation.”