My thoughts snag on Lees’s words like a toe catching on a hidden root—I’m so taken by surprise I’ve no chance to keep myself from tumbling. I clutch at fragments of memories of Chev, grasping for something that will right me and set me back on my feet, but every thought that comes to mind sends me spiraling farther. He has never been particularly hard on Lees—no harder than he is on any of us—but she knows his priorities. What reason has he ever given her to trust that he would let her interests come before the clan’s?
But then, isn’t that what it means to be a strong High Elder? To put the interests of the clan first, no matter the sacrifice? I can’t say that Lees’s charge against Chev is wrong. But I can’t say that Chev is acting outside the code he’s set for himself.
But what is right? As Kol sets the pack of supplies at my feet, I turn that question in my mind. But I find no answer.
As we sit, I watch a group of gulls circle a rocky island far out in the water. I remember the shags I hunted this morning, the way they wouldn’t leave their young. How this instinct to protect was a weakness instead of a strength.
Images rise and fade in my mind—the rocky island, the swarm of birds, the broken skull, the blood dripping from the net. Instinct isn’t always best. Am I protecting Lees by forcing her to stay in camp, I wonder, or is this instinct a weakness in me, too?
I stare hard at the pack of supplies, imagining Roon readying everything he and Lees would need. They will run again. She said so herself. And when they do, they will be sure they can’t be found. I will lose my sister forever.
My eyes move from the pack to the boat to the paddles. I turn to Kol, who casts no shadow. The sun is directly overhead. It’s time for the burial of his father. There’s no more time to think, only time to act.
“I have an idea,” I say. “A way to keep Lees safe from Chev’s plans.”
NINE
I smile, and I see Roon smile too. He leans toward me. “You’re going to let her go, aren’t you? You’re going to let us run away.”
“No, I’m not,” I answer. I feel Kol’s gaze. “My plan is not to let you and Lees run away. . . .” I say.
I turn to Kol just in time to see his eyes flash with surprise. “So you, then? You will go with Lees?”
“Yes. And you and Roon will stay.”
Kol stands. For a moment he seems caught between turning away and coming to my side. He looks down at his shuffling boots before crossing to me, taking my hands, and pulling me to my feet. His lips lower to my ear. “You would run away—today—the day we became betrothed? You would leave before my father is buried—”
“We can’t wait,” Lees interrupts. Despite the fact that Kol is clearly speaking just to me, my sister feels she can answer. “It will take until nightfall to get there.”
“To get where?” Kol turns to her, all patience gone. His tone is no longer tender. Instead, his voice is like a fire starter, relentlessly drilling down. “Where are you going that is so far away, it will take until nightfall to arrive?”
“I don’t know,” Lees say. “Only Roon knows the place.”
Kol whirls on his brother. He doesn’t ask. He doesn’t have to.
“I won’t say until I know this is not just a trick. I need Mya to promise to go with Lees. If she’ll promise to go, I’ll tell.”
Kol swallows hard. He drops his gaze to the ground. “It’s too dangerous. Mya, I know you want to protect your sister. I can’t blame you, but I can’t stand the thought of the two of you running away alone. Please say you won’t go.”
There is a stretch of silence, tight like a rope binding my heart to Kol’s.
“I can’t promise that,” I say. My voice is so small, these words so hard to say. “But I can’t promise to go, either. Not until I know where I’m going.”
Roon looks at me with the eyes of prey that’s been cornered. He glances at Lees. She smiles and nods and he takes a deep breath. “To an island north and west of here.” His words come out like a confession—once the first have broken through, the rest come tumbling in a torrent. “I found it while exploring the coast, searching for another clan. It’s big. It has game—even fresh water. It’s perfect.”
Kol shakes his head. “We know all the islands northwest of here—”
“Not this one. It’s too far offshore to see—beyond the horizon.”
Kol eyes his brother as if he’s weighing every word he says. “Why have you kept this to yourself? And how do you know about an island beyond the horizon?”
“It wasn’t a secret, I swear. I hadn’t even met Lees yet, so it was never part of a plan or scheme or anything. I found it by chance. I got washed out by a storm—I couldn’t paddle hard enough to get back to shore—so I came upon it completely by accident. But I knew if Mother or Father ever found out—about the storm, about an island beyond the horizon—that would be the end of my explorations. So I kept it to myself.”
I shiver at the thought of Roon dragged out to sea in a small kayak, beyond the view of land. Nothing but danger lies beyond the horizon—that wisdom has been handed down for generations. Some say it’s the hunting ground of huge predators that crest the waves to swallow boats whole. Some say a great waterfall drops into a deep abyss. But everyone knows it’s forbidden.
“It’s far too great a chance to take,” Kol says. “Surely you see that.”
I cannot meet Kol’s gaze. If I look into his eyes—if I remember his lips pressed against my throat—I won’t be able to carry out this plan and paddle out to sea, leaving him behind. “You need to stay,” I finally say. “Both of you need to bury your father. But I can go ahead with Lees. We can show Chev how far we’re willing to go to resist his plan.”
“But why not just stay and confront him? Tell him what you are willing to do—”
“Chev doesn’t work like that. I have to leave,” Lees says. She’s up on her feet, standing right in front of Kol. He may not want to look her in the eye, but she is going to force him to. “Words aren’t enough to change his mind—”
“This time they will be—”
“But why? What would be different? By staying, I’m proving he has power over me. What motive does he have to seek out any other option?”
Lees’s words explode on my ears. I think of the offer Morsk made me. You could give Lees her freedom.
Does Chev know about Morsk’s offer? Have he and Morsk conspired together? Is this Chev’s way of getting what he wants while making sure it looks like I was given a choice, rather than forced against my will?
Lees still stands in front of Kol, still confronts him with her questions. “What other option does he have?”
Me, I think. I am his other option.
I shake the words from my head and grab Kol by the arm. “Would you walk with me for a bit?” I ask.
Both Kol and Lees glance around, clearly noticing the short stretch of ground we can safely walk at the base of this cliff. There’s really nowhere to walk to.
There’s only somewhere to walk away from. Or someone to walk away from. It’s clear I want to talk to Kol out of Lees and Roon’s hearing.
I’m sure Lees doesn’t care. She seems pleased to have a reason to drop back down on the ground beside Roon, who’s been silently staring out to sea. He’s probably planning their next move if Kol succeeds at convincing me to stay.