I crouched on the board, gaining speed.
At least sex dulled the pain momentarily, but maybe… Damn, maybe Paxton was right. I was no closer to moving past her than the day I stupidly walked away from her.
Maybe it was time to man up and deal with the shit hand I’d dealt myself.
Just ahead of me, Paxton waved up at the glass, and I looked up, doing the same as I neared where Leah stood watching. She waved to him and then to me as someone came to stand next to her.
Holy shit. It can’t be.
Her hair brushed her delicate shoulders, the streaks of purple evident from down here. My head swiveled, trying to keep her in view as I passed.
That pixie face, those angled cheeks, that pert nose, those perfectly curved lips—I’d know them anywhere.
Her hands pressed against the glass—
Wham! My legs were jarred a millisecond before I slammed into the wall. I bounced back, landing on my ass.
“Watch out!” someone yelled in English right before they hit me with their pole.
I’d seriously fallen in the middle of the surface lift—the only ski lift in the park that pulled the riders up the slope by rope and pommel.
I pushed back, getting the hell out of the way, and looked over to where Leah stood at the window. Alone.
“Are you okay?” she mouthed, her eyes wide with worry.
For fuck’s sake, was I hallucinating now? The moment I let my memories rule me for a few seconds, she started appearing?
I nodded to Leah and got to my feet. Was I so far gone that my brain was seeing what it wanted?
“You okay?” a girl asked as she slid by me on the pommel, her skis coming within a foot of my board.
“Yep, thank you,” I said, tipping my head. That’s right, ladies, I have four X Games medals, three of which are in snowboarding, and I ran into a goddamned wall.
Get a grip. I headed down the slope and met up with Pax at the bottom of the slope.
“You take a detour?” he asked.
“Yeah, something like that,” I replied, knowing he hadn’t seen me make an utter ass out of myself. No doubt he’d see it later when Bobby—the director of our documentary—got his hands on the footage.
Pax didn’t question me, just gave me a what-the-hell look. “Time to get back. You game? You look a little pale.”
“I’m fine,” I said.
They were the only words I spoke while we got out of our gear.
“Landon, are you okay?” Leah asked, racing over to me as we walked out of the frigid air into the dry desert heat.
“What happened?” Pax asked as he wrapped his arm around her.
“Nothing. I’m fine,” I answered, giving her a smile. At least, I think I did. I wasn’t sure, since I felt numb just about everywhere.
That numbness didn’t go away as we were driven back to where our ship was docked. It didn’t go away while Pax told me all about our new numbers since he’d just pulled off the first-ever triple front flip on a motocross bike a few days ago during our live exhibition. Our YouTube subscribers were way up and so were Instagram and Snapchat, but our video views were through the roof.
It didn’t go away when they scanned my ID card as I boarded the huge cruise ship we’d called home since August. All I saw as I walked into our massive, three-bedroom suite at the back of the ship was the replay my brain wouldn’t shut off: the glimpse of the woman I’d seen next to Leah.
“Landon!” Pax shouted, breaking through my brain fog.
My head jerked toward him. “What? Damn, you don’t have to yell.”
“Apparently I do, since I called your name about three times first.”
“I said, I’m fine.”
His eyes narrowed. “Right, but I asked if you wanted to go to the pool?”
I blinked. “I need to work out.”
“You just finished boarding. Skip the gym for one day and come hang out. I know you’re prepping for Nepal, but one day isn’t going to kill you.”
He was right. I could skip one day. Besides, I was so distracted that I was liable to go flying off the treadmill or some stupid shit that was on par with running into a wall.
“Okay. Pool. The pool is good.”
“Hey, maybe you’ll find the snow bunny,” he teased as he headed up the stairs to his room.
“No snow bunny,” I said quietly to myself as I went into my room. Another girl wasn’t going to help me in this situation—not when she was all I could think about. I’d been through it before; I just needed to clear my head. I stripped out of my clothes and changed into trunks before I met Pax in our living room. Bobby had the camera crew in a meeting at the dining room table. If we hurried we could get some undocumented time.
“Seriously, you’re being weird,” Pax said while we took the elevator to the pool deck. “Leah said she saw you hit a wall while we were boarding. Do you think we need to get your head checked out? She’s already up at the pool saving us some lounges, but we can meet her later.”
“I’m fine,” I repeated.
“So you keep saying.”
Music was blaring on the pool deck as we stepped into the ninety-degree heat. The sun beat down onto my skin, but it did nothing to warm the numbness that I couldn’t kick.
Maybe Pax was right and I’d hit my head.
The crowd was thick, and the music was loud—it usually was as we were leaving port—and Pax disappeared to find Leah. I surveyed the gyrating masses and wished I could feel a little of their excitement.
First term was over, there were two more to go, and we were headed toward the Indian Ocean. It was all pretty overwhelming if I stopped to really think about it. Then again, stopping to think about anything was what had gotten me into this situation.
“There you are!” The blonde from the slope bounced over, her tits hanging out of her triangle top.
“Hey.” I forced a smile as she looped an arm around my waist.
“Want to get a drink with me?”
Not really.
“You know, I think I’m going to—”
“Oh, come on. The bar is right over here!” she said, turning us around.
Ice hit my bare chest and slid down my abs to my trunks as I sucked in a lungful of air. Holy shit, that was cold.
“I’m so sorry!”
Her voice hit me with the force of the hurricane that she was, and as she looked up, I lost what breath I’d managed to take in.
Her eyes widened, panic running across her beautiful, so-familiar face.
“Oh God,” she whispered.
The purple streaks in her hair rested against the smooth line of her chin, and her lips were parted in a look of shock that I was sure mirrored mine.