“We’re not. They’re upstairs calling all their friends with the good news.”
“That blows,” she said, looping her arms around his waist and looking up at him.
“Indeed. Most of parenthood does. But we can still celebrate.” He kissed her lightly on the lips. “Maybe now you can relax.”
*
After last period, Lexi went to the counselor’s office. It was a small narrow room lined on all sides with bookshelves. In those shelves, there were literally thousands of college manuals.
She sat in a blue plastic chair, waiting.
At just past three-thirty, the receptionist looked up from her desk. “Lexi, Mrs. Morford can see you now.”
Lexi nodded and slung her heavy backpack over her shoulder. She walked down the narrow, college-poster-lined hallway and stepped into the office in the back. Through the window, she could see the gym and a pair of skinny kids—probably freshmen—playing Hacky Sack.
Lexi sat down opposite the large brown desk that dominated the room. Her counselor, Mrs. Morford, sat behind it.
“Hello, Lexi.”
“Hey, Miz Morford.” Lexi reached into her backpack and pulled out two thick envelopes. Inside were acceptances from the UW and Western Washington. She handed them to her counselor, who read the letters and then set them down.
“Congratulations, Lexi. Now, what can I do for you?”
“Both schools offered me scholarships. Two thousand dollars. But … look at the costs. The UW tuition is fifty-three hundred, room and board is sixty-two hundred, and books are another thousand. That’s more than thirteen thousand dollars. How can I get more help?”
“We talked about this when your grades dropped last semester, Lexi. The UW and WWU are extremely competitive schools. There are several island scholarships you can apply for, though, and you could always take out a loan. They have some really good educational programs.”
“I’d have to borrow ten thousand dollars a year. And even then I’d have to work all through school. I’d be in debt when I graduated.”
“A lot of people go through college on loans, Lexi. It’s a way of betting on your own future.”
Lexi sighed. “I guess community college isn’t so bad. I can go to the UW in two years.”
Mrs. Morford nodded. “It’s a great way to save money. Two years will go by fast. In no time you’ll be back with your friends.”
Not the ones who mattered.
Lexi thanked the counselor and walked down to her bus stop. All the way home, she worked and reworked the numbers, trying to magically refashion it all into a plan she could make work.
But there was no making it work. Short of borrowing a ton of money, she was not going to a four-year school.
By the time she was home, she was thoroughly depressed. Never had she felt as much of an outsider on Pine Island as she did now. She would have given almost anything for the choices most island kids took for granted.
At home, she went straight into her room and flopped onto the bed.
The phone rang.
She answered. “Hello?”
“Lexi! Zach and I got into USC. Both of us. And Tyler got into UCLA. Isn’t that awesome? Can you come out to dinner with us tonight? We’re celebrating!”
“That’s great.” Lexi banged her head against the headboard. She should just drown herself. Tears stung her eyes. She wasn’t one to feel sorry for herself, but why couldn’t life go her way JUST ONCE? “Of course I’ll celebrate with you.”
Mia launched into another college story and Lexi couldn’t take it anymore. She mumbled some excuse and hung up on her best friend.
A few minutes later, a knock at her bedroom door surprised Lexi. “C-come in,” she said, sitting up in bed.
Eva walked into the small, cramped room. The walls were covered with photographs: there were pictures of Zach playing football, of Mia waterskiing, of the three of them at the homecoming dance. “These walls are paper thin. I heard you crying.”
Lexi wiped her eyes. “I’m sorry.”