“Why?”
“You’re going to think it’s crazy. Or a little bit psycho.”
“Hit me.”
“I was just happy you guys were finally talking. Honestly. I mean, you had that little talk the day you found out he had joined GetOut, but today you were finally putting everything to rest. While we’ve been away I really feel like I’ve become friends with Will, and I knew how much he held on to everything that happened between you last year. It was something he couldn’t forgive himself for.”
Whereas, for Micah, it had been something he had barely thought of since. Not in a mean or selfish way, but because he had truly thought it was settled. It seemed Will had been dwelling on a lot of issues, and Micah had been too clueless to realise.
As if reading his mind, Emma said, “It’s not something to make you feel guilty. You were in Perth; there was no way you could have known.”
“But I had spoken to him a couple of times, even if it was only messages on Facebook. He had to know I wasn’t bearing any grudges.”
“I guess he just needed to have it said openly. And maybe he never thought it would be, especially as you guys weren’t even in the same city anymore. Maybe he didn’t think he would get the forgiveness he wanted.”
“But I—”
“Yeah, yeah, I know. But you proved it to him today. And honestly, I didn’t know if you could. That day on the field when you first realised Will had joined GetOut, I didn’t think you had it in you. But you surprised me then, and you surprised me today.”
“I’m full of surprises.”
“But I shouldn’t be thinking like that. I know what you’re like, Micah. You’re not that same shit that used to act like he was better than everybody else and that nothing could touch him. I mean, you never were that shit, because it was all an act, but I still didn’t like you then.”
“Don’t forget it was you who took a chance on being my friend. I didn’t deserve it, honestly. Everything you said about me was right. The way I treated people.”
“Maybe Will isn’t the only one who needs convincing that he’s forgiven.”
It was so simple; he was an idiot for never seeing it in himself.
“Ah, there it is,” Emma said. “The lightbulb above your head. It’s blinding me.”
It was almost blinding him too. Micah hugged her fiercely, and she yelped as she wasn’t expecting it. Her arms tightened around him and he didn’t want her to let go.
“Micah, seriously, is something wrong? Are you okay?”
The gory details couldn’t be shared, not at this moment. It would take too much energy, and he needed that in order to tell the people who could help him the most. Emma had to wait for another day of deep-and-meaningfuls. “Not yet. But I think it will be.”
“WHERE HAVE you been?” his mother asked as he entered the house. “You have to be at the airport in two hours!”
“At the hospital,” he told her, dropping his new messenger bag on the couch.
Joanne’s face softened. “How is Will?”
“I think he’s getting better.”
“That’s good. But I’ve been worried about you, Micah. You haven’t been home, Sam’s been calling here for you—”
Shit. It was a good thing he was planning to come clean, then.
“—And we’ve barely seen you the whole time you’ve been home.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. Just tell me what’s going on.”
Micah sighed, and threw himself down on the couch besides his bag. “I don’t think I have enough time to tell you everything before I have to go.”
“Then give me the gist of it.” She sat beside him, expectantly.
The gist of it wouldn’t even begin to cover everything.
“You better call Dad in,” Micah said. “And Alex, while you’re at it.”
Chapter 15
MICAH WAS surprised his family had actually let him leave Melbourne. Talking to them, really talking to them, had been a sobering experience. He had left out some of the more salubrious details, instead telling them he wasn’t handling being away from home very well at all. But he had admitted to the drinking and some of the one-night stands. The depression was the icing on the cake. His parents had looked stricken enough, so he couldn’t tell them about his most recent night with Paul and the consequences of it. Alex, as usual, had looked grave—but that was his natural facial expression. Still, Micah knew he was just as concerned, and that was a burden for a thirteen-year-old who deserved to have an older brother who looked out for him instead of the other way round.
“What have they been doing over there?” his father fumed.
“Rick,” Joanne said. “Let’s not jump to any conclusions.”
“Let me just say one thing,” Micah said. “Please, don’t blame Sam. He and his family have done everything they could to help me adjust, but I’ve kept them in the dark just as much as I have you. I was very good at hiding from them the stuff I was doing.”
Rick cleared his throat. “Uh, is there more you have to tell us?”
“You don’t really want a list, do you, Dad?”
“No, I guess not.”
Micah turned to Alex. “You’re being quiet.”
“There’s nothing I can say.”
“I’m sure there is. You’re part of this family, aren’t you? Your opinion is mandatory.”
“Stop badgering your brother,” Rick said.
“I just want to know what he’s thinking.”
Alex rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I guess I just want to know why you always keep doing the same thing. You said last year you’d learnt from your mistakes, and here you are doing it all over again. It’s like you want to wreck everything good that’s happening to you.”
Wow. Alex didn’t hold back. But it was good. It was what Micah needed to hear.
His parents were waiting, almost too scared to see what his reaction would be.
“You want to know something, Alex? Sometimes I really don’t know. I guess I justified it by thinking I was dealing with my problems in my own way, and I didn’t have to get you guys involved.”