“I’m going to get Jade,” I said. “Wait right here.”
Rookie mistake, obviously, but hauling her ass up and down the stairs was more trouble than it was worth. I plucked Jade out of the house’s loft, blitzed out of her mind. I’d underestimated Kappa; the dudes obviously got the good shit.
When we got back downstairs, Lauren was right where I left her in the corner. Except she had company, Kappa tee guy’s friend, the one who offered me a tour of his dorm. He leaned in, mashed his lips on Lauren’s. I could see her giggling and turning her head from the stairs.
“What the fuck?” I was on them in seconds, yanking the guy off her by the back of his polo. “She’s thirteen.”
The guy gaped at me, eyes bloodshot, didn’t even get a chance to respond because of a booming voice behind me, saying my name.
Ben. So pissed off.
He didn’t say a word to me until we were back at my car, despite Jade and Lauren giggling and saving each other from face-planting on the cracks in the sidewalk.
“Have you been drinking?” He looked me up and down. I shook my head, too tired to snipe back at him that he said I could come.
“Get home.” His voice vibrated with anger. “Get her home.”
He nodded toward Lauren, who was tearing dandelions from the ground, blowing the seeds at Jade, who stuck out her tongue to catch them.
“This is seriously fucked up,” he whispered at me. “I just—there’s seriously something wrong with you if you think this is okay.”
I made Jade sit in the backseat the whole ride home because she was high as shit and pissing me off. Lauren puked on the floor in the front seat, and I started to cry, exhausted and thinking about standing outside with a hose at one a.m. when we got home. Jade was like, “Chill, that’s what all-weather mats are for,” and Lauren laughed and I told them both to shut the hell up.
There’s seriously something wrong with you.
I’m starting to think he’s right.
At school on Monday, we waited for Kacey by her locker. I asked her as casually as I could what she did over the weekend.
“I had to finish my common app essay,” she said, pulling her hair up into a messy bun.
Jade stared her up and down. “All weekend?”
Kacey dropped her arms, giving up on the bun. “Yeah, and I hung out with Lauren. Ashley was away.”
You fucking liar. You fucking terrible liar. Her lies brought a slick of sweat to my palms. Jade just kept smirking; she put the heel of her boot on the locker adjacent Kacey’s and leaned back. Kacey glanced over at us, blinked. Like she was surprised we were still there.
“What did you guys do?” she asked.
Jade’s smirk stretched into a grin. “Bay’s brother got us into a frat party.”
“Where?” Kacey looked at me, her eyes suddenly big. I could practically see the blood stopping in her veins.
“Eau Claire,” I said, and the first bell rang. Kacey dropped her gaze back to her portfolio. Had she looked relieved to hear we hadn’t been in Madison too? I’d missed it.
“It was a real shitshow.” Jade hiked the strap of her tote bag up over her shoulder. Her eyes met mine: I wanted to mouth, What the hell do you think you’re doing? She wouldn’t tell Kacey what we’d done, how we brought Lauren to the Kappa Tau house, how she’d puked in my car—
Then Jade reached out and pinched my wrist, said, “See you at lunch,” and flashed me a wolflike grin. I knew what she was doing, that it was all a game to her. I’d been the one who convinced her it was all a game. It was my idea to drive to Kacey’s house, prove that she was lying about being home, and drag her little sister out to party.
My tongue tasted sour as I watched Kacey and Jade walk off to first period—art—together. I jogged to catch up with them. “J! Let me see your math homework quick.”
Jade stopped and turned, blinked at me. “I’m gonna be late.”
I shrugged—Like you care—while Kacey scuttled off to class, dutiful little thing she is. I’ll bet she just wants to suck Mr. White’s dick. Jade let out a heavy sigh when she was gone. “What, Bay?”
“You can’t mess with her like that. If she finds out what we did, we’re in deep shit.”
“You mean she’ll stop talking to us?” Jade said. “Why do you care, if you hate her so much?”
I’d said a lot of things about Kacey, but I’d never said I hated her. Do I hate her? I don’t even know anymore. Sure, she consumes most of my thoughts, and I’ve considered how satisfying it would be to punch her in that stupid fucking face of hers, but it’s not like I want to be rid of her. In fact, the thought is downright distressing. Because if I lose her, I’ll lose Andrew too.
“I just don’t want to get in trouble,” I said. “I couldn’t give a shit what Kacey will think.”
Jade laughed. She actually laughed, like the idea of me not caring what Kacey thinks was hysterical. “Bay, you’re so frigging fixated on her, you’re not even thinking straight.”
For the first time in five years, I didn’t know what to say to Jade. But somehow I came up with the most pathetic thing ever: “You don’t like her either.”
Jade gave me a wry little smile. “Isn’t that what you wanted?”
I’m in study hall now, and I’m still sick over the conversation. It’s never been like that between Jade and me before—so much subtext. I can’t lose Jade. Jade is my person, the only person I really like in this town. We take care of each other—we need each other.
I would sooner die than lose Jade.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
By some miracle, my own phone doesn’t start to ring until we’ve paid for breakfast and we’re hurrying out to the parking lot. I wince before accepting the call.
“Where the hell are you?” Ashley barks.
I cringe. “With Tyrell. We’re on our way back to school.”
“On your way back to school,” she repeats. “Do you know that your father wanted to call the police when he said the school called and you walked out? If the security camera hadn’t shown you driving off with Tyrell, I would have.”
A tear leaks out, stinging my wind-burned cheek. “I’m sorry.”
“Is there something you need to tell me, Kacey?”
I can’t. She’s going to find out about Andrew’s phone calls to Bailey anyway; I doubt Burke is done with Andrew yet, and there’s no way Ashley will let Andrew talk to him alone anymore.
“Go back to school,” Ashley says. “I swear if you don’t, I’ll call the sheriff myself.”
And then for the first time ever, she hangs up on me.
Next to me, Tyrell sucks in a breath and lets out a low-pitched shiiiiiit. “My gas light went on. We gotta stop and fill up.”
“Seriously?”
“We’re already in deep shit. Five more minutes won’t make a difference.”
He pulls up to the pump at the Fill N’ Go and climbs out of the car. I tilt my head to the window as a guy in a Badgers hoodie comes out of the gas station cashier.