The wave hits me then, all at once, a series of small gasps falling into the air between us. “Vance, I’m—”
“Let go,” he urges, his body thrusting at a faster pace as he leans down to kiss me. I moan into his mouth, giving him this last piece of myself and waiting for him to do the same.
“Ember….” He groans his release as his head drops, hair brushing against my skin, lips pressed to my neck. “I love you.”
My words are barely a whisper. “I love you, too.”
I feel his smile. “I know.”
Neither of us move as our breathing slows then levels out, returning to a steady rhythm. Eventually, Vance rolls away, disposing of the condom before claiming his spot next to me. He tugs my body close, my back to his front, until no space exists between our heartbeats. A contented yawn lifts itself from my throat and Vance chuckles. “Tired already?”
“Yes.” I wiggle against him. “And it’s all your fault.”
“Funny, I don’t feel guilty at all.” His fingertip skates along the inside of my arm. The tickle brings a smile to my face. “In fact, I was hoping we could go another round.” I hear the grin in his voice and I wedge myself closer, if that’s possible.
“Just one?” My eyelids feel heavy and although my mind wants to stay awake, my body has other plans. As I drift off, a blissful sigh floats from my lips. “You came back… for me.”
“I did,” he whispers, mouth resting above my ear. “I didn’t have a choice.”
“Me either,” I admit in a soft murmur, sleep taking over my thoughts. “I really love you.”
EMBER SAILS OFF into sleep. Her warm, bare skin against mine. As her chest rises and falls, her breathing becomes deep and even. I force my eyes to remain open, wanting to remember this moment. To engrave it in my mind. I wonder if that’s possible. If you try hard enough, if you can will your brain to remember something.
But it doesn’t matter now. Any apprehension I had is trumped by this crazy love I feel for her. My chest explodes with it. I’ll admit, being present in my own life is strange. Not allowing my choices to be derailed by a crippling fear of the future. Because Ember is right. Life doesn’t come with guarantees and I’d rather have a shot at happiness with her, than none at all.
I lie awake until the stars disappear and the sky morphs into a black canvas painted in moonlight. The clock beside Ember’s bed reads 2:30am. Not wanting to collide with her mother, I sneak out from beside her and tug on my clothes. As I put on my sneakers, I watch her face blanketed in sleep. This girl—she’s changed me—and I’ll never be the same. That alone makes me smile.
Placing one knee on the bed, I lean close to drop a gentle kiss against her hair. “I love you, Mickey,” I whisper, leaving something for her then quietly slipping out the door and into the night.
Cool air brushes across my skin, a peaceful hush settles over the neighborhood. My heart is a complete fucking contradiction, racing to an insane beat inside my chest. Funny how life can be so unexpected, how it manages to put things in your path that forces you to open your eyes.
As I climb the stairs two at a time, a high unlike anything I’ve ever felt courses through my veins. I can still smell Ember on my clothes, taste her skin on my lips, feel her body moving beneath me. She takes my breath away, and yet, I can finally breathe. For the first time in so damn long, life stirs inside of me, whipping around like a fierce tornado.
A strange noise catches my attention. I continue up the stairs, the sound growing louder the closer my feet get to the landing. I laugh to myself when I realize Julian has a girl over and tiptoe past his room. But I stop short hearing it again—coming from behind my father’s closed door. I can identify the sound but it doesn’t make sense. Static clouds my thoughts as my legs propel me closer. I should walk away. Pretend I didn’t hear anything. But I can’t leave it alone. I refuse to leave it alone.
My gut twists as my fingers tighten around the knob and squeeze, slowly cracking the door open. The sight of my father’s body moving over a woman who sure as fuck isn’t my mother makes blood roar in my ears and I lose my shit. “Jesus Christ,” I bite out, startled by the fucking display in front of me. The muscle in my jaw throbs and I can’t catch my breath. I turn to bolt down the stairs, my head a whirl of confusion. Legs that nearly seize up somehow manage to carry me to the door. My hands shaking, it takes me three tries before the lock clicks and I stumble onto the front lawn, cursing my father to hell and knowing I need to get the fuck out of here. I don’t get very far though. I’m inches from my car when his voice calls out to me.
“Vance, wait.”