‘What, then?’ she demands, turning between us. ‘Are you kicking me out?’
‘Of course not,’ I say. ‘It’s not that at all. Your father’s going to be renting a small apartment for himself – at least for now. He’s moving out in a few weeks. We’ve not quite figured out the date yet. It depends on a few things. There won’t be room for you there, so we assumed you’d want to continue living here.’
Olivia’s eyes narrow ferociously and there’s a moment where I think she’s going to race upstairs, grab her stuff and tell us to go to hell. There’s fire in her, the same way there was in me. I was very careful to use the words ‘small apartment’, as opposed to ‘bachelor pad’, but I have my suspicions over what Dan’s single life might bring.
‘Oh, so that’s it, is it?’ Olivia spits. ‘You’ve made all the decisions for me. I don’t get a say at all.’
‘We want to try to make this as easy for you as possible. Everything can continue on at the house as it has been. Your father won’t be moving far – only to those new flats down by the river. You’ll be able to see him more or less when you want.’
I look to Dan once more and – finally – he opens his damned mouth.
‘It’s for the best, Liv,’ he says calmly.
I remember the first time he used that soothing voice on me. We knew one another in the way people do when they go to the same school and live in the same town. We’d nod when we passed each other in the street, or say hello if we saw each other in the same bar. Then, one evening, I was standing at the bar in the Red Lion waiting to be served. He asked if I was seeing anyone and, when I said I wasn’t, he said he’d like to take me out. It’s clichéd, unromantic even – but it is what it is. Our first proper date was on my twenty-first birthday. He took me out to a posh restaurant a couple of towns over. I ordered steak and chips, while he went for some Japanese thing that I couldn’t pronounce then and wouldn’t attempt to now. Afterwards, we went for a walk on the canal bank. It was cold and he lent me his jacket. Then, in that exact same voice he’s using now, he asked if I’d like to see him again.
A little over a year later and we were married. Another year after that and Olivia was born.
She might be eighteen, but she looks so young now. Olivia’s dinner-plate eyes make her look like a frightened nine-or ten-year-old, not a fully-grown adult.
‘It’s for the best for you.’ Her voice begins croakily but the final two words are hissed towards the pair of us. She pushes up from the stool and grabs her bag from the floor. The spread of badges rattle into each other as she adjusts it on her back and heads for the stairs.
‘Oh, and F-Y-I, Tyler is still missing,’ she adds with venom. ‘Not that either of you care.’
Stomp-stomp-stomp, plus one slammed bedroom door later and she’s gone. All in all, everything went more or less as I’d expected.
Chapter Thirteen
Wednesday
The house feels lonely the next morning. Dan and I are cordial with each other but there’s little for us to say. We did much of our talking when we decided to separate. I know people will ask which of us first suggested it because the important thing in any break-up is who’s the dumper and who’s the dumpee. For the record, it genuinely was mutual. We’d argued over something stupid – me leaving a pair of shoes on the bedroom floor, if I remember rightly. He shouted, I shouted back and then we sat on the bed. He said something like, ‘This isn’t fun any longer, is it?’ and I agreed. From there, it was easy. It was like the sun had finally come out after a long, long winter. We decided on a few things, set about figuring out what it would mean practically to separate and now we’ve finally told Olivia.
None of that cooperation has stopped our sniping at one another, of course. It’s automatic now: a defence mechanism for me, at least.
I’m eating a bowl of bran flakes on the sofa when the doorbell sounds. Dan’s pottering in the kitchen, sorting himself out some sort of healthy breakfast, but our eyes lock at the sound. It’s 6.45 a.m., far earlier than any sane person would ever call round.
It’s the way that Dan charges around the kitchen counter that lets me know he’d rather I didn’t see who’s at the door. He calls that he’ll get it as he’s moving but I’m much closer. By the time I’m in the hallway, there’s no space for him to push past. I take my time turning the deadbolt and then pull the door open to be met by a smiling blonde in lycra. She’s short, probably not even five foot, and bobbing on the heels of her trainers. I doubt she’s much over twenty-one or twenty-two – if that.
I don’t recognise her at first and it’s only when she sticks out her hand and says, ‘Alice’ that I clock she works at Dan’s gym. Our gym, I suppose – even if I rarely go. She did my induction when I went at the very beginning.
Dan had told me he was having a few personal trainer sessions but it’s only now that everything is slotting together.
Alice starts to jog on the spot as Dan edges around me onto the path. He’s grabbed his gym bag on the way through.
‘We should get going,’ he says, talking to Alice and then looking over her to me. ‘I’ll be going straight to school after this,’ he adds.
Alice is ludicrously smiley. It’s like someone’s painted the grin on her face, because it doesn’t slip. We shake hands and she has the smoothest skin I’ve ever touched – not that I routinely go around stroking people.
‘We’ll have to get you out one of these days,’ Alice laughs – although I sense the hilarity isn’t at my expense.
‘Not my thing,’ I reply.
‘That’s what everyone says. You’d be surprised how quickly that can change after a few sessions.’
‘I still don’t think it’s for me.’
She pats her stomach. It’s perfectly flat and there’s a weighty thud as if she’s slapping a rock. ‘My brother just got back from holiday. Brought back all sorts – including so much chocolate. I can’t stop eating the stuff. I only do this so I can eat what I want.’
Yeah, I think, it looks like you eat whatever you want – as long as whatever you want is green and tastes of damp paper.
Dan has all his weight on one leg and is edging towards the road, desperate to get Alice away from the house. His lack of subtlety is hilarious – which only makes me want to prolong things.
‘Where did your brother go?’ I ask.
‘Croatia. Have you ever been?’
‘No. I’ve seen a bit of France, Spain and Italy – the usual places. Nothing that exotic.’
‘Me, either. He said it’s very nice.’
Alice continues bobbing on the spot. ‘Sure we can’t tempt you out? If not today, then another time…?’
I put a hand across my front. ‘I can’t do too much. I broke my ribs when I was a teenager and it hurts if I overstretch myself.’
Alice shrugs. ‘Oh well – I suppose I’ll see you again.’
She waves sweetly and then turns to my husband. It’s only a fraction of a second, the merest of glances, but it’s unmistakeable. Dan’s eyes widen slightly, his lips arching up into a glimmer of a smile. It’s gone as soon as it appeared and then he swivels and Alice follows him along the path, through the gate, onto the pavement.
When the front door is closed, I give it my best middle finger. I’m not sure if it’s for him or her. Probably a bit of both. It’s hard not to wonder whether they’re shagging. There was definitely something in the way he looked at her. He has to be twice her age but he makes a decent salary, he’s in shape, he doesn’t have young children to tie him down. There’s a lot there that could be appealing to a certain type of young woman.