She straightened up and cleared her throat. She was a beautiful girl and would be an even more beautiful woman. She glowed, especially when she did something that engaged her. Looking at her was like seeing a memory of his lost innocence.
When Ben was thirteen, he vaguely remembered “liking” Lisa Holloway. And she “liked him back.” And that’s what it was for the better part of a year: shy smiles and awkward conversations. And he had some kind of recollection of planning a movie date with her. But then Ellen went missing and around the same time Lisa’s parents got divorced. The date never materialized, and shortly afterward, Lisa became enamored of the dark side of everything. She went through a slew of older boyfriends, became truant, and was almost kicked out of high school. But then some unseen force reeled her back in during their senior year, although she still dressed in silly costumes. Ben wondered how it would have been if they had gotten together. Would she have cheated on him like Ro did?
Possibly . . . probably. Once bitten, twice shy.
Ben looked over Lilly’s shoulder. She had produced an elegant solution. “Very good. Way better than mine.”
“You started me off in the right direction.”
“Then I’ll take the credit.” He stood up. “I’m going back to Albuquerque. You have my e-mail. If you need any more help, don’t be afraid to use it.”
“Thanks.” This time her smile was real. “I’m not mad at you, Ben. I could never be mad at you.”
“How about Haley?”
“I love Haley. She’s my sister and best friend all rolled into one. It’s my problem, not anything she and Griff are doing . . . other than being in love. I’ll deal.” She shrugged. “Honestly, I don’t mind the solitude. I do need to study for state finals. I have a fighting chance of winning, but I’ll get wiped out in regionals. I can’t compete against all those Texas private schools. My mom will be disappointed but she’ll get over it. She’s working on other things besides math competitions to get me into the Ivies.”
“You know you’re a lock for the Ivies. You’re half Indian and I found out from Ro that it means that you have underrepresented minority status. Plus, you come from a state that’s underrepresented in the Ivies. And you are a master silversmith, judging from my recent Christmas gift. And as an aside, you happen to be brilliant.”
Her face was filled with electricity. She closed her workbook, got up, stuffed her pages into her backpack, and slung it over her shoulder. “Maybe I’ll go say hi to Haley.”
“Maybe you should.”
She smiled and left, skipping down the hallway.
Chapter 4
As the time approached, he was getting nervous. Not nervous excitement, but actually nervous, and that gave him pause. He had a wife. He had a child. He had a life beyond this and he certainly wasn’t getting any younger. Maybe . . . just maybe it was time to quit.
Each time he had done something, he’d sworn it was the last time. If he kept going, he’d eventually get caught. Something would trip him up and he knew the police had his DNA. If he kept his nose clean, he’d be fine, and that wasn’t a hard thing to do because when he wasn’t abducting, raping, and murdering girls, he was living a fairly conventional life. When he didn’t travel, he worked regular hours. Kara wasn’t a churchgoer, but she was civic-minded. She was involved with the school, volunteered at the library, and ran its book club. She did Pilates with her friends. She spent too much on ridiculous things: designer clothes and handbags, tennis lessons, and absurdly expensive shoes for their son. Not to mention the cost of private school tuition. It seemed that the school was raising its fees every six months. And if he even mentioned putting Ivan in public school, she’d chew his head off. No wonder he was tense.
No wonder he took out his frustration on others.
He hated to admit it but he was more like his dad than he thought. And Kara was more like his mother than he wanted to believe. Not that his parents had been abusive, but his mother was demanding.
Dad had been an engineer. He provided for the family and never raised his voice in anger. As far as he knew, Dad had never been unfaithful because Dad never had a friend. Nor did he seem to care about having friends. He also never cared about material possessions. He drove an old Buick and dressed every day in short-sleeved white shirts, black slacks, and a clip-on tie. Dad had lived life as a loner, sequestering himself behind a locked door whenever his wife started to nag. But even when he was physically around, it was as if he wasn’t there. He read a lot—biographies and nonfiction. If they talked at all, it was always about a book. So maybe Dad did teach him something—the importance of being well read and well educated.
School had been his solace. It wasn’t the best school, but he was the best. It afforded him the luxury of going to a top university on someone else’s dime. But at least his education hadn’t gone to waste. He used it, he plied it, he availed himself of all the perks it gave him.
And there were perks. Free travel, free rentals, and lots of open roads. He had always loved to drive. It calmed him down, it gave him perspective, and in the end, it gave him the greatest thing of all—not freedom, although that was important.
What the open road gave him was access to prey.
June answered the door. Her hair was pulled back in a tight ponytail, yanking on her temples, giving her a temporary facelift. Not that she needed it. Her skin was smooth, with high cheekbones and dark eyes that always looked suspicious and a bit angry. “Yes?”
She wasn’t even bothering with the bare minimum of civility. It wasn’t her fault. Math heads were different. Ben said, “Hi, June, I was wondering if George was around.”
“Why do you want to see George?”
“I’ve got a couple of questions for him.” He zipped up his parka.
June realized it was cold outside. “Come in.”
“Thank you.”
June closed the door. “You want some tea, Ben? You look cold.”
“No, I’m fine, thank you.”
“Suit yourself.” She disappeared and the house went silent. Ben suspected that Lilly was in her room and didn’t feel like talking. Okay by him. He didn’t feel like facing another emotional female. June could be very cool, but it wasn’t because she was mean. She was a controlled person and probably somewhat controlling. She didn’t come across as a tiger mom, but from Lilly, he knew that she had expectations. And that wasn’t a bad thing. Without pressure, a tire went flat.
He thought about Haley, slipping into adolescence, replete with boyfriend and social status. Lilly was becoming more and more withdrawn, and he was helpless to stop it. But she would blossom eventually. Lilly had always had an inner strength.
George came out. “Hey, Ben.”
“Feel like having some pie?” Ben asked.
June made a face. “Pie? What pie? You already ate.”
“There’s always room for pie,” George said.
“You had two pieces of cake, George. If you eat any more desserts, you’ll go into a diabetic coma.”