He leaned across her and rummaged in the glove compartment for a flashlight, which he stuck in the back pocket of his jeans. “Come on.”
They exited the car, and Kate breathed in the scent of evergreens and mud. Everything felt so intense. The air rang with the sounds of frogs and crickets. The sun was a gassy yellow ball hanging low over the river. The day had been humid and lush, a first taste of summer, but here by the water, the air had an edge of chill. The temperature would plummet when the sun went down. At moments like this, Lucas seemed exotic to her. The boulevards of Paris were old hat to Kate, but a parking lot in the north woods was new, full of possibility. She would not let him go. Not when he filled her senses like this. Whatever it took to change his mind, she would do it—anything.
Instead of following the signs to the sandy beach and boat launch, Lucas led her to a dirt path that hugged the riverbank. A notice at the trailhead warned, Trail not maintained. Proceed at your own risk, which delighted her. Kate wore flip-flops with her cutoffs and tank top, and ignored the brambles and pebbles that assaulted her feet as she clambered quickly up and over the trunk of a fallen tree at the path’s mouth. Lucas slipped ahead of her, holding back branches as they progressed so they wouldn’t spring back and hit her in the face. The path was narrow, crossed every few feet by the gnarled roots of giant evergreens. To their left, the forest was a dense wall. To their right, the ground dropped off steeply to the river. Kate looked down and the vertigo thrilled her. One wrong step and you’d tumble, rolling head over heels through sharp granite outcroppings and the broken-off spikes of tree stumps till you hit the steel-colored water forty feet below. Nothing like the threat of death to make you feel alive.
After a few minutes, the path began to climb upward. Sweat trickled down Kate’s back, and Lucas’s T-shirt clung to his body. Kate’s eyes lingered on him as he walked ahead of her, to the point that she lost her footing and stumbled, catching herself before she tumbled down the cliff.
Five minutes in, she asked how much longer.
“Just a little ways.”
“We’re all alone. Why not stop here?” she said. Beside the path, a fallen tree beckoned, perfectly horizontal and covered with cushiony moss. They could lay their clothes down and have the perfect bed. The sight of him was too much. She wanted him now, wanted to feel his smooth skin against hers as the humid afternoon cooled to dusk.
“The old railroad bridge is just ahead.”
“Oh. That place the kids jump off of? You told me about that.”
“We can talk better there. It’s overgrown, and it makes a sort of shelter. Like a tree house. Come on.”
They walked faster. The thought of that epic jump urged Kate on. That’s how she would win him back. They’d hold hands and step into the abyss together. Feel the rush of air as they fell through space, and the shock of the icy water when they hit. She wanted to come to the surface beside him, swim to the riverbank and peel his clothes off.
Within a few minutes, the path curved sharply and opened onto a wide vista of the river. Kate’s breath caught at the sight of the ruined bridge. Two stone supports rose from murky water, holding up two wooden spans that had once joined in the middle, each surmounted by the spectral remains of an arch. The entire central portion of the bridge had collapsed away to nothing. Just empty air. A train trying to cross would cascade down into the water, car by car, and get swept away by the current. She could hear the powerful rush of water from way up here.
They stepped off the path and onto the bridge, walking carefully between the rusty tracks and rotted boards. Trees had taken root at the foot of the bridge and grown up all around it. Vines and weeds rose from the bank out onto the wooden trestle and climbed the metal posts, where they spread out, lush as a Cambodian jungle, and formed a green bower. As Kate moved forward toward the garden alcove, Lucas’s arm shot out and stopped her. She looked down at the chasm yawning at her feet and gasped. They had come farther than she realized, near to the point where the bridge fell away, leaving nothing but air between her and the water.
“Careful,” he said, and their eyes met. Her heart pounded, with adrenaline and with lust.
“I love it here,” she whispered.
Her fingers closed on the smooth skin of his arm. She pulled him closer, and their lips met. Her mouth moved down his neck to the hollow of his collarbone where a pulse beat. His skin tasted of salt and smelled warm, like the sun baking on a beach blanket.
He pulled her away. “This isn’t why I brought you here. We need to talk.”
Lucas pulled her into an area where the leafy curtain was the thickest. The spot was well used, and they stepped over the detritus of other people’s hookups—condom wrappers, beer bottles, cigarette butts. Lucas cleared a space for them, kicking the trash over to the knife’s edge where the bridge ended, and launching it down into the water. When the garbage was gone, he stripped off his T-shirt and swiped at the floor, whisking away any last specks. She watched his back as he moved, the smooth expanse, the power of it. When he was satisfied that the floor was clean, he shook out the T-shirt, then laid it down like a blanket.
“Sit down, let’s talk.”
“Oh, with your shirt off. I know what you want. The same thing as every other boy.”
“Fine, I’ll put it back on and you can sit on the tracks. I was trying to be a gentleman about it.”
“About breaking up with me?”
“Like I said, I need some head space.”
“It’s not me, it’s you?”
“Exactly.”
“Do you know what a fucking cliché that is?”
“Yeah, I get it, I’m a cliché.”
She felt short of breath and shaky. Desperate, on the verge of tears. Was it the coke, or was it Lucas? Kate cried rarely. It was an unusual sensation for her, and she didn’t like it.
“There are things I could do for you,” she began.
She knelt on the T-shirt beside him, took his face in her hands, and lifted her mouth to his.
“This won’t change anything,” he said, but his body relaxed under her touch, and his mouth opened.