I stood up and the room spun.
“Don’t be jealous.”
I looked back at Macie. “First off, I’m not jealous of anything. He’s my brother. It’s just… you and him. Together. I can’t picture it.”
“Oh, I can,” Macie said and twirled her finger in her hair.
“He’s…” I sighed. “You know who he is. He’s killed people, Macie. Is that what you want?”
“He’d kill for me I bet,” Macie said. “It’s hot.”
No, it’s not. You think it is. But it’s not. He’s really deadly. He used to fight. He gets paid now to protect… to steal… to kill… he’s the bad guy! He’s the fucking bad guy!
“What?” Macie asked. “You’re giving me the eyes.”
“No I’m not,” I said.
“Look, I said you’re jealous because I’m getting sex and you’re not. That’s why you’re angry right now. Face it.”
“Sex? Are you kidding me?”
“When was the last time you had sex?”
“Why is that relevant?”
“Exactly,” Macie said. “I know you’re kind of protected by Luke. It’s sexy, really. I mean, not you and him. Just that he would go so far for his sister. It’s so manly.”
I gritted my teeth. It had nothing to do with Luke being a man. Luke needed me and used me. And I did the same for him for my own mistakes that were always looking to take me down.
Bottom line - Macie didn’t understand my life. Or Luke’s.
“Don’t worry about my sex life,” I said.
“You have no sex life,” Macie shot back.
“Maybe I like it that way.”
“Yeah, right. I don’t know how you do it. You get to watch those sexy sweating fighters and it doesn’t do anything for you?”
I thought about the guy from the other night. Standing there, facing the wall. His muscles were trapped in my mind. My fingers tingled, along with some other places.
“Look at you getting red,” Macie said. “You like it! You like the fights.”
“I grew up involved,” I said. “I have a rule against that stuff though. There’s so much money involved, if anything goes wrong, people die.”
“What? If you fucked someone and they lost, it’s your fault?”
I nodded. “Yeah. Maybe. Depends on who is running the fighter?”
“What do you mean?”
Macie stared at me innocent, brown, doe-like eyes. She really had no clue. She was pampered, spoiled, and thought all of this was a game. I used to think that way too. Until I saw people die. Until my father died. Until my brother started to hold me hostage to make him money. Until I tried to get out of it all and ended up almost dead. Well, I was supposed to be dead… and they would find me and kill me.
“Nothing,” I whispered. “Just nothing.”
“Hey, are you supposed to be drinking wine?” Macie asked. “I mean, does it bloat you or anything before a shoot?”
“I don’t give a damn,” I said and walked toward the window.
Outside the street was normal. Cars coming and going. The valet guy leaning against the podium. He was the owner’s nephew, Marco. Not the smartest guy in the world so they let him park the cars and earn on tips.
There was a thundering boom on the door.
“Open the fuck up!” Luke’s voice bellowed.
Macie hurried to jump up.
As I walked by her, she grabbed my arm and told me to wait. She fixed her hair, pulled on her shirt to show more cleavage, and took a deep breath.
I opened the door and Luke came barreling in, still dressed in his fancy suit. Only now he looked a little messy. His hair roughed up, his face white. I thought for a second there was an attack or something but then I saw his eyes.
He’d been snorting.
“Hey Luke,” Macie said as she looked at her nails, trying to be casual.
“Macie. What are you doing up here?”
“Waiting on you.”
“Let’s go then. I’ll give you a tour of the kitchen. Private.”
“I’d like that,” Macie said.
Just like that, my best friend walked to my brother. She touched his chest and then poked at his chin with her pointer finger. Luke grinned and then smacked at her ass. Macie jumped forward, yelling.
She left without saying goodbye to me.
When the door shut, Luke’s smile was gone.
“I’m going to tear her apart.”
“That’s gross. That’s my friend.”
“She’s not your fucking friend. You don’t have any friends. Remember that. You don’t get close to anyone. They’re all out to use you, Rose. Christ.”
“Why am I up here, Luke? I want to go to my place.”
“No. I can’t have that. Where’d you park?”
“Marco parked it.”
“Eh, fuck. Stupid kid. He’s going to get his brain blown through his asshole someday.”
“Luke, why are you acting all weird right now? You’ve been off for a few days. Ever since the fight…”
Luke rubbed his nose. “Fuck that. Don’t worry about that, Rose. You get a paycheck yet from that other thing? That catalog thing?”
“Not yet.”
“I’ll get it,” Luke said. “I’ll send Jimmy and Little Ace down there.”
“No!” I said. “Please don’t do that. Don’t burn bridges.”