“We’ll see you later,” Raquel said as she led Elizabeth away.
I turned to Dinah. “What was that? I’ve never seen Elizabeth that way.”
Dinah leaned close. “I feel so dumb. I wasn’t even thinking.”
My eyes silently questioned.
“She’s not allowed to talk about it, but she did open up once in prayer meeting. You must not remember.”
“I don’t, but if she said it in front of me once, would it be wrong if you shared?”
She wrinkled her nose. “I don’t think so, but not here. Let’s head over to the lab. Brothers Raphael and Benjamin will be at their meeting for a while.”
Scooping up our cups, we moved out of the shop and toward the lab.
Once we were there, she exhaled. “Elizabeth loves Father Gabriel, The Light, and Brother Luke. She’ll be the first to tell you that she has no regrets about coming to The Light, but once a year, around the time of her birthday, she gets sad.”
I shook my head. “We don’t celebrate birthdays.” It was something I’d learned early on with Sister Lilith.
Dinah’s lips formed a straight line. “That doesn’t mean they don’t happen.”
I nodded. “OK, but why is she sad?”
“In the dark she has a sister, a twin sister. From what she said, they decided to follow Father Gabriel together, but after they did, her sister changed her mind. Elizabeth doesn’t begrudge her sister that right. After all, we’re all here because we want to be, but according to her, she never got the chance to say good-bye. Being twins and all, they were very close. She said she knows that the dark isn’t death, but after Brother Luke told her that her sister changed her mind, Elizabeth felt a loss, as if her sister died. Like all of us, Elizabeth was ready to give up everyone and everything from the dark. She just didn’t expect to give up her sister. It bothers her the most around her birthday.” Dinah shrugged. “Their birthday.”
“Wow, poor Elizabeth.”
“Please don’t mention it to her. Of course, we were all glad we could help, but Brother Luke didn’t approve of her sharing. As you know, Elizabeth is usually the poster child of obedience. Being corrected for her plea for help reminds her not to bring it up again.”
Reminders!
I nodded. “Thanks for telling me.”
There wasn’t much extra space within the walls of the community, but on the north end there were a few acres of woods with paths. When I first awoke from my accident it was the beginning of the dark season; now we were into full light. Though it never got warm at the Northern Light, it was considerably warmer near the end of June than it had been in November.
“Hurry up,” Jacob teased as he ran ahead.
“I am,” I said with a laugh as my feet pounded the hard dirt and my lungs filled with fresh air.
Lately Jacob had been required to be gone more, including for overnights. However, since the weather had warmed, whenever he was home, we tried to run together, either early in the morning, before our days began, or later, before dinner. The first time he’d mentioned running was the first time I remembered the memory I’d shared with Elizabeth six months earlier. Though Jacob said we’d done it regularly before, the first run since I’d awoken had been when the frigid temperatures finally broke in April. Two months later we were still running together.
Reaching the end of the woods, we came to the small grassy area just before the innermost wall. With the sky bright above, Jacob reached for my hand, and brought us to a stop. Looking out to the wall, I thought about running a longer distance. Not leaving, just having more room.
“I’d ask if we could go to the hangar and run where we had more space, but . . .”
“You’d rather not be eaten by polar bears?” he asked with a grin.
“Yes, that’s a big deterrent.”
“But,” he teased, “just think how fast you’d run.”
Smiling, I leaned into his embrace.
Now that I was no longer in what he’d called a crash course of remembering, I loved the way he was when it was just the two of us. His wit and humor made me laugh. That didn’t mean he didn’t correct me; it meant it wasn’t often necessary.
As chosen, we had the responsibility of setting examples for the followers; thus in public we didn’t show affection. However, running, especially in the early morning, allowed us more freedom. Despite being outside, we were alone. I rose up on the tips of my running shoes and kissed his cheek. “You know, I love this.”
His features softened. “I know you do. So do I.”
I sighed. “It’s strange, but it’s one of the few things I think I remember.”
He kissed the top of my head and played with my still-short ponytail. “Who knows, maybe more will come back.”
With my hand still in his, we began walking and I confessed, “I’m not trying to be selfish, but I miss you when you’re gone. I wish you didn’t have to leave so often.”