They’ve asked her not to leave. She’s just as trapped as me. Trapped by what happened in that house.
‘Look, I’ve got to go,’ Nina says at last. ‘This is a crappy pay-as-you-go mobile and I don’t think there’s much credit on it. But I’ll phone back and leave the number at the desk, yeah? Tell them to call me if you get kicked out.’
‘OK,’ I say at last. There’s a catch in my throat and I cough, trying to hide it. ‘Take care of yourself, you hear me? And don’t beat yourself up over Flo. She’ll be OK.’
‘I really don’t know if she will,’ Nina says. Her voice is bleak. ‘I saw a few paracetamol overdoses when I was a med student and I know how it goes. But thanks for trying. And Nora—’ She stops.
‘Yes?’ I say.
‘I … oh fuck, look, it’s pointless me saying this. Forget it.’
‘What?’
‘I was just going to say – try to remember what happened after you left the house, yeah? There’s a lot riding on this. No pressure,’ she says with a slightly shaky laugh.
‘Yeah, I know,’ I say. ‘Bye, Nina.’
‘Bye.’
She hangs up and I rub my face. ‘No pressure’, Nina said. I assume it was her idea of a joke. She knows as well as I do the pressure that we’re under. All of us.
I must remember. I must remember.
I shut my eyes and try to remember.
‘Nora.’ A hand on my shoulder, shaking me awake. ‘Nora.’
I blink and try to sit up, try to process where I am and what’s going on.
It’s Lamarr. I’ve been asleep.
‘What time is it?’ I say blearily.
‘It’s nearly noon,’ she says. Her voice is crisp. There’s no hint of a smile now. In fact she looks very grave. DC Roberts is behind her, his glower fixed and unmoving. He looks like he was born with a pencil and a sour expression. It’s impossible to imagine him cuddling a baby or kissing a lover.
‘We’d like to ask you some more questions,’ Lamarr says. ‘Do you want a minute?’
‘No, no I’m OK,’ I say. I shake my head, trying to wake myself. Lamarr watches. ‘Go ahead,’ I say.
Lamarr nods, clicks on the tape recorder and repeats the caution. Then she gets out a piece of paper. ‘Nora, I’d like you to read this. It’s a transcript of emails and text messages taken from your and James’s phones over the last few days.’
She hands the paper to me and I sit up straighter and rub the sleep from my eyes, trying to focus on the closely typed sheets of paper. They’re a list of texts, each annotated with the number they were sent from and a date, time and some other information I can’t interpret – GPS location maybe?
The first one is marked with my number, and ‘Friday, 4.52 p.m.’
LEONORA SHAW: James, it’s me, Leo. Leo Shaw.
JAMES COOPER: Leo?? Christ is that really you?
LEONORA SHAW: Yes, it’s me. I really need to see you. I’m at Clare’s hen weekend. Please can you come up? It’s urgent.
JAMES COOPER: What, seriously?
JAMES COOPER: Has C told you?
LEONORA SHAW: Yes. Please come up. I can’t say what this is about over the phone but I really need to speak to you.
JAMES COOPER: You really need me to come? Can’t it wait until you’re back in London?
LEONORA SHAW: No. It’s really urgent. Please. I’ve not asked you for anything but you owe me this. Tomorrow? Sunday’s too late.
The next reply from James is not until 11.44 p.m:
JAMES COOPER: I’ve got a matinee & an evening tomorrow I won’t be finished at the theatre till 10/11. I cd drive up but it’ll take me 5+ hours. I’ll be there in the middle of the night. You really want me to do this?
Saturday, 7.21 a.m.
LEONORA SHAW: Yes
Saturday, 2.32 p.m.
JAMES COOPER: OK.
LEONORA SHAW: THANK YOU. Leave your car in the lane. When you get to the house go round the back. I’ll leave the kitchen door unlocked. My room is at the top of the stairs, second door on the right. I’ll explain everything when you get here.
There is another long pause. James’s reply is marked 5.54 p.m., and it almost breaks my heart.
JAMES COOPER: OK. I’m so sorry Leo – for everything. Jx
And then, at 11.18 p.m.,
JAMES COOPER: I’m on my way.
And then that’s it.
When I look up at Lamarr I know that my eyes are swimming, and my voice is cracked and mute.
‘The interviewee has finished reading the transcript,’ she says quietly for the benefit of the tape. And then, ‘Well, Nora? Any explanation? Did you think we wouldn’t find these? Deleting them was pretty pointless you know, we recovered them off the server.’
‘I … I—’ I try. I take a deep breath, force myself to speak. ‘I d-didn’t send these.’
‘Really.’ It’s not a question, just a flat, slightly tired acknowledgement.
‘Really. You have to believe me.’ I know, even as I begin to gabble, that it’s hopeless. ‘Someone else could have sent them. Someone could have cloned my sim card.’