Swift nodded triumphantly, her point made. “And men go”—she almost whispered the word—“bald.” She shook her head sadly. “The beauty of men is a sweet soft thing that passes all too soon, like a bird across the sky.”
“Um,” said Elliot. “Maybe both our societies are messed up, and they each only think one type of person is really a person. And the type of person they think is really a person is allowed to show imperfections and age . . . whereas the type of person they think is an object should show no signs of being a person. We’re socialized to see the imperfections in those objects.”
Swift chuckled. “You’re still a funny, taking little thing. I think it’s a shame of Serene. I hope she treats you well when you’re under her protection. I’ll ask her permission to continue writing to you.”
“Except I don’t need her permission to do anything!”
Swift continued blithely, as if Elliot’s opinion on the subject did not count, and Elliot knew that no matter what he said Serene was getting asked, as if Elliot were a book to be borrowed or a child taken out for an ice cream. “And if she leaves you forlorn and weeping, remember you can trust me. These young rogues can be heedless, but I’d treat you well.”
Elliot stared. “I will remember that. In fact, I have a feeling this scene will come back to me again and again. And again and again and again.”
Swift reached out and touched Elliot’s cheek. “Ah, sweet soiled dove,” she murmured.
“I . . . actually don’t have a response to that remark,” Elliot said.
“Come on, Elliot!” Serene shouted. “I will not stand here and have my comrades insulted by a small-minded provincial tyrant! I would rather be cut to pieces!”
“We are two souls with but a single thought, baby,” said Elliot, and ran after her and Luke as they stormed away.
Serene’s mother was the one who got the last word. Sure-Aim-in-the-Chaos-of-Battle did not run after her errant heir, or raise her voice. She stood with her guard at her back, her arms casually crossed, her silver-and-shadow hair streaming, and she spoke clearly and calmly.
“Go and play with your humans, child. When the time for child’s play is past, I know you down to bones and blood. When the time comes, you will leave all this and come to my call. You will ride into battle at my side.”
The elves might have forbidden them entrance to their territory, but that did not mean the commander was going to give up. One day Serene and Luke arrived at their lunch table looking very pleased with themselves indeed.
“What’s the good news?” asked Elliot, reaching for Serene’s hand.
“Commander Woodsinger is sending out a personally selected troop which she will lead herself to make a sweep of all the non-elven territory where the bandits have been spotted, hoping to catch a few,” said Serene. “And we’re in the troop.”
“Congratulations, my pearl, my diamond, my tiara of assorted gemstones,” said Elliot.
Serene took his hand and squeezed it. “We’re even going near the Forest of the Suicides, which is harpy territory.”
“Now that’s neat,” said Elliot, with actual interest.
“It’s not,” said Luke. “Don’t even think about it.”
“Who, me?” Elliot asked innocently. “I never think about anything.” He changed the subject to avoid discussion, and scowled at his reflection in his fork. “Is it crazy that I keep worrying about losing my hair?”
“You’d have to lose about half of it before anyone noticed,” said Luke.
“Age but shows the marks of character being displayed and life being lived,” Serene told him. “You live well, and I like your character. So there’s no need to worry.”
It was adorable how hard she was trying to be sensitive for her human boyfriend. Elliot raised Serene’s hand to his lips and kissed it. Richard Plantgrown, passing by, made the sound of a whip cracking: Elliot did not know if it was for Elliot, because of the kiss, or for Serene because of what she’d said. He hoped it was for him. Serene bore enough, and he hated seeing her, proud and not quite untouchable, bear more for his sake.
Elliot had taken much worse than this for no reason at all, and this was for her, for the best reason he knew. He didn’t care what anyone did to him.
Luke turned on the bench and looked at Richard. That was all he did. Richard put his full tray down on a random table and fled out of the door.
Serene had not deigned to look at Richard while he could see her, but she watched his retreating back with an expression that boded ill for Richard next time he entered the practice grounds.
“Yes,” Elliot said to Serene, electing to ignore the problem. “But how do you explain the baldness issue? Swift made an excellent point about the baldness issue!”
Elliot did not want to be left behind thinking about what could be happening to Serene and Luke out among the bandits. So he stole a warrior-training cloak and accompanied them, slinking in the back so that he could say honestly that neither of them had any idea he was there.
“Honestly, Serene and Luke had no idea I was here,” he said when he was discovered and dragged in front of the commander. “You can’t punish them, because they had no idea I was here!”
Commander Woodsinger sat on a tree stump in the clearing where the cadets were putting up their tents, and stared at Elliot. Her eyes said that she was considering awful things like execution or more tutoring.
“So I have just one cadet flagrantly disobeying my orders and in urgent need of discipline,” said the commander. “Wonderful.” She held up a hand to forestall Elliot’s protestations. “I believe that Cadet Chaos-of-Battle and Cadet Sunborn are not aware of your presence. I believe this since they are not currently in your presence.”
Elliot was about to protest—he was in a protesting mood—but at that point Serene and Luke arrived, looking windblown and worried.
“Right on cue!” said the commander. “I do not have the time to discipline you, Cadet Schafer, but for the entirety of this mission you will be under my eye.”
“No problem, Commander!” said Elliot.
The commander’s order became a problem the very next day.
That night, though, Serene and Elliot had a tent to themselves, which they moved a little farther away from the other tents, into the trees. Elliot had brought what papers he could on the reported sightings and robberies, and they went over them and whispered secrets in between discussing the movement of bandit groups.
“I don’t know why the commander thinks we can get the bandits when the group obviously moves from the elven to the human territories to escape justice from both. The only way to defeat them is to unite our forces.”
Except your mum is being a jerk, Elliot did not say.
“I don’t know why you came if you think this expedition won’t be any use,” Serene remarked.