If There's No Tomorrow

“Me, too, actually.”

“Anyway, I’m over here for a reason. He’s having a barbecue today. Actually, his older brother is. Only a few people are going to be over there,” he said. “You should come with me.”

My heart started dancing all over the place, screaming, Yes, yes, yes! My brain recoiled and immediately told my heart to shut the hell up, because my heart was stupid and it made me do stupid things. “I don’t know...”

“Come on.” He grabbed my foot. I tried to pull it away, but he held on, wrapping his fingers around my ankle. I refused to read anything into that. “We haven’t had the chance to see each other the last couple of days and I just got back last weekend.”

Yeah, and I kissed you and obviously you weren’t into it. He was acting normal, totally normal, though. So much so I almost wondered if I’d hallucinated the lake.

“Spend time with me. Quality charbroiled-cheeseburgers time.”

I dropped my book in my lap and grasped the arms of my chair. “I’m not hungry.”

“Turning down grilled cheeseburgers? Now I know you’re just being difficult.”

My eyes narrowed as I tried to pull my leg free again.

Sebastian dipped his chin. “I’ll drive and you’ll have fun. All you have to do is get your pretty butt out of that chair and I’ll handle the rest.”

I froze, eyes wide.

He thought I had a pretty butt?

The grin on his face spread, and a second later his fingers danced over the bottom of my foot. I immediately shrieked. “Stop! Stop it!”

His fingers hovered over my foot as he raised his brows. “Are you going to come out with me?”

I was breathing heavy, paranoid that he was going to start tickling my feet again. “You’re not playing fair here.”

“Why play fair when I can just tickle you into doing what I want?” he replied, placing one finger on the center of my foot. My whole leg jerked. “So, what’s it going to be, Lena-bean?”

“Lena-bean?” I shouted, fingers digging into the arms of the chair. When was the last time he called me that? Before I needed to wear a bra? “I’m not ten years old, Sebastian.”

His lashes flicked down, shielding his eyes. “I know you’re not ten anymore.” His voice deepened. “Trust me.”

My lips parted as his words cycled over and over in my head. His gaze flickered up and met mine. There was no dancing in my heart, only a wild beating I felt in every single part of my body.

Why didn’t you kiss me back?

“Come with me,” he said again. “Please?”

I closed my eyes. I wanted to go, but...if I did, I needed backup. “Can I see if Megan and Abbi can go?”

“Hell yeah,” he replied. “Keith will be ecstatic to hear that. You know he’s—”

“Trying to get with Abbi. Yes.” I inhaled deeply, opened my eyes and then nodded. “Okay.”

“Perfect.” He flashed a wide smile and then lowered my leg back to the railing. His fingers lingered for a few seconds and then he let go. “Knew you couldn’t resist me.”

Deciding to pretend I hadn’t heard him say that, I dropped my legs to the floor and swiped up my books and phone. “Give me a few minutes.” I rose and stepped over to the door, feeling my cheeks heat. “Got to let Mom know.”

“Get a swimsuit,” he ordered, pushing off the railing and dropping into my chair.

I thought about Skylar in her bikini and decided I would accidentally forget mine.

After placing my books on the bed, I quickly texted Abbi and Megan and then dropped my phone in my purse.

Downstairs, I found Mom in the kitchen. Papers were spread out in front of her, some loose and others stapled. Her blond hair was pulled up in a high ponytail and she had reading glasses on, perched at the end of her nose.

“Whatcha doing?” I asked as I stopped in front of the chair beside her.

“Looking over the new underwriting laws.” Mom looked up. “Basically spending my Saturday in the most boring way possible. What about you? You’re not working this weekend, right?”

“Nope.” I smoothed my palms over the back of the chair. “I was thinking about going to a barbecue with Sebastian.”

“That sounds fun.” Mom rested her chin in her palm as she stared up at me. “Kind of sounds like a date.”

“Mom,” I warned.

“What?” She widened her eyes. “I would a hundred percent support that—”

“Oh my God,” I groaned, throwing my hands up as I glanced toward the stairs, praying that Sebastian would decide to make himself known. “It’s not like that. You know that.”

“A mother can hope and dream,” she replied. “He’s a good boy, Lena.”

“Abbi and Megan will probably be there. So will other people.” I pushed away from the chair. “Sorry to ruin your dream.”

“Damn.” She sighed pitifully. “I was thinking about knitting little baby booties for your and Sebastian’s first child.”

“Oh my God.” I gaped at her, horrified but not surprised. My mom wasn’t right sometimes. “You’re ridiculous and I’m surrounded by ridiculous people.”

“Why be surrounded by anyone else?” She grinned as she fixed her gaze on the mass of papers in front of her, and I shook my head. “When do you think you’ll be home?”

“Not before dinner. Maybe this evening?”

“Sounds good to me. At least I don’t have to make dinner tonight.” That was Mom, always looking on the bright side of things, even when it was impossible. “By the way,” she said, looking up again, pinning me with that mom look I only ever saw when she was going to say something she knew I didn’t want to hear.

I knew it had to be about Dad.

I tensed.

“You need to start answering your phone, Lena. This has been going on too long.”

Folding my arms across my chest, I inhaled through my nose. “Not nearly long enough.”

“Lena,” she warned. “You are beautiful, loyal to a fault, but what happened between your—”

“Mom, I promise I’ll answer the phone. Okay?” I so did not want to have this conversation right now. “But I have to get going. Sebastian is waiting for me.”

She looked like she wanted to say more but tipped her head back. “Okay. Have fun, but be careful.”

Bending over, I kissed her forehead. “Always.”

*

“All I’m saying is that it’s a double standard.” My feet were on the warm dashboard of Sebastian’s Jeep. The air conditioner was cranked on high, but it was barely beating the heat out of the interior. “You can drive around shirtless, but if a girl drove around wearing a bikini top and no shirt, people would lose their ever-loving mind.”

“And all I’m saying is that I would a hundred percent support the idea of girls driving around in bikinis,” he replied, one hand resting on the steering wheel, the other thrown over the back of my seat. The baseball cap was turned forward, blocking the sun, and he was still shirtless in his swim trunks and Nike sandals.

Behind my sunglasses, my eyes rolled. “Of course.”