He pauses when his rod dips. Another small perch.
“One to one. It’s a tie,” he says with a grin, and then continues when he grabs another shiner. “Anyway, I stayed up for a few more hours before stumbling upstairs to my room. I was so wasted, and all I can remember is stripping off my clothes while everything around me was spinning. I pulled the sheets back and slipped in behind what I assumed was my girlfriend.”
“It wasn’t?”
“Each room housed three guys.”
I start laughing and it isn’t long before he joins me.
“I spent the whole night in my underpants snuggling with my roommate . . . Bean.”
“Bean?”
“Uh, yeah, he had a bit of a flatulence issue.”
I burst out laughing.
“Once I realized I wasn’t cuddling my girlfriend, it was too late. A few of my frat brothers were standing in the doorway, snapping photos of the supposed indiscretion.”
“What did your girlfriend say?”
“Ah, well, she was upset I got drunk and ignored her all night, and that was the end of her.”
“You’re an ass,” I snicker, to which he replies, “So I’ve been told.”
I startle and clutch my fishing rod when it’s nearly yanked out of my hands. Grabbing ahold of the reel, I struggle to crank it.
“I need help,” I call, and Declan sets his rod down, moves behind me, and grips the rod.
“You’ve got something big,” he says when he puts his hand over mine and helps me reel in the line just like my dad used to.
I let him take control and move my hand with his. The fish fights us for a bit, and when it approaches the water’s surface, I see how substantial it is.
“What is that?” I ask excitedly.
He pulls it up, announcing, “It’s a big fucking bass.” He kneels, pinning the fish down with his foot, and removes the hook. “You want to keep it? We could have the chef in the kitchen prepare it for dinner tonight.”
Looking at the fish flopping around, I tell him, “No. Let him live.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
Declan drops the bass into the water, looks over the pier’s edge, and watches him as he swims down, disappearing into the lake.
I bait my hook and return to our conversation, saying, “A part of me always wanted to do the whole college thing.”
“You still could.”
With shame, I confess to him, “I never even graduated high school, Declan.”
He looks at me and there’s a hint of surprise in his eyes. “How far did you get?”
“I never finished the ninth grade. When Pike turned eighteen, I ran away with him, so school was out of the question because I’d get busted by the state. I was always a good student though, made excellent grades. I loved reading and learning, so I had Pike buy me all the materials to get my GED even though it would never be official. Since I was still underage and in the system, I couldn’t use my real name for anything.”
“And when you were of age?”
“By then, it didn’t matter. I knew we’d never have the means for me to ever go to college, so what was the point of going back to get my GED?” I say. “I did what I could though. I’d pick classes that interested me out of the local college class catalog and Pike would buy me the textbooks from a used bookstore. I’d read them, and in a pathetic way, it made me feel like I was making something of myself.”
“You were.”
“All I did was make a mess of myself.”
“That too,” he responds in light jest. “But you’re bright and well-spoken. No one would ever suspect you only made it to the ninth grade. You’re an incredible woman who’s fighting hard to make things right.”
“Things will never be right.”
“Maybe the past won’t, but right here, in this moment, this is where it all changes,” he says. “You can do anything you want to do.”
His confidence in me is powerful, making me feel like there’s a future to look forward to. That the choices I make won’t be for naught. And maybe he’s right—maybe it’s the here and now that I need to focus on to move forward. I’ve always been running, and now, for the first time, I no longer have to. I can stand here, in one place, and know that with Declan by my side, I’ll be okay.
So with a little bit of optimism, I tell him, “I want to finish high school.”
He smiles, pride in his eyes, and says, “We can get all the details on what needs to be done tomorrow. But tonight, I’m taking you out.”
“A date?”
“It’ll be a first for us.”
After catching too many perch to count, we decide I win based on the bass alone. Being able to be out with Declan, free from lies and games in this city where we used to hide, feels great. This is where we fell in love, but that life was always tainted, and now . . . now we can create something new.