Grabbing a drink, he muttered, “You gonna be okay today?”
Selix had his own attributes. One of which he could guess another’s agendas and flaws accurately. He’d never fully asked what I suffered from or why I’d sometimes play the cello for days or punish myself with sword wielding until I passed out from exhaustion. He knew enough to understand Pim’s introduction to my structured existence wasn’t easy.
“I’ll be fine.” Snatching a towel, I wrapped it around my neck and rubbed it through my hair, capturing the droplets of exertion. “I need to go back to the warehouse. Have a few things to run through with Charlton.”
“I’ll get ready and meet you in an hour. That work?” Selix moved toward the exit.
I nodded. “Fine.”
He left with a salute while I headed to the elevator and pressed the top floor. I’d shower and eat and then find Pim and hope to God my mind was in a safer place now the sun had risen, and I’d broken a few blood vessels.
Last night had been a mistake. I had no idea what possessed me to do such a thing, but it would never happen again. I wouldn’t let her get under my skin any more than she already had.
Striding into my suite, my heart clenched to find it empty. I didn’t want to acknowledge why disappointment climbed through my veins rather than relief.
Pim wasn’t in my room, but something foreign rested upon my bed: a large red parcel from one of the most expensive stores in Monte Carlo.
I’d ordered Jolfer to send one of his female staff to buy Pim more clothes. She needed a wardrobe that fit her better. She deserved dresses that clung to her and showed off how stunning she was rather than swamp her delicate frame.
She also needed other things. Things that I didn’t want to see because I didn’t need such images fogging up my mind.
I should send the box straight to Pim, but I couldn’t help myself. Cracking the lid, I fingered an item that made my cock rock fucking hard before I slammed it closed again.
Goddammit, I shouldn’t have ordered that.
It would only make my life that much more tricky.
But Pim was worth it.
She was worth every penny.
Even if she cost me everything.
Chapter Sixteen
______________________________
Pim
RETURNING TO THE warehouse where I’d stolen the photo frame filled me with anxiety. I kept peering into workers’ faces, expecting to see accusation and knowledge about what I’d done.
However, no one glanced at me strangely. No one acted cool or wronged. In fact, their smiles were warm and welcoming, recognising me from yesterday and already accepting me as part of their boss’s inner circle.
If I was honest, I was surprised Elder invited me to accompany him. After what had happened last night and his disappearing act, followed by his cut lip and bruised appearance from what he said was routine exercise this morning, I’d prepared to be alone for a few days.
But that was before Selix called and told me to be on deck within the hour.
Before Elder had held out a hand with grazed knuckles and sore fingers to welcome my company.
Now, here I stood again amongst a world I never knew existed, surrounded by hard working, kind people who had a normal existence just like the one I strove for.
Elder stopped a few times to shake hands with overseers in different departments, sharing short conversations about rudders and ballasts and things I had no knowledge of.
Not once did he comment that this yacht was mine or attempt to bully me into accepting such a ludicrous gift. Not once did he seem to care his cheekbone had coloured to a nice blemish or his tongue kept returning to the crack in his lower lip.
He was stunning when unhurt. But he was drool-worthy slightly beaten up.
I didn’t know why my belly clenched every time I looked at his mottled hands. Perhaps, it was the knowledge he knew how to protect with his body. Or I was just screwed up to like violence after my tragic past.
Either way, most of the time, he pretended I wasn’t there.
I didn’t mind.
I was happy to be included. Thrilled he’d decided to let bygones be bygones.
Whenever I looked at him, I saw past the stern businessman dressed immaculately in pressed jeans and black t-shirt to the man who was unwanted by those closest to him.
Protectiveness and fierce loyalty filled me.
I’d meant what I’d thought last night. Sleeping with Elder for myself was never an option. Sex still held its repugnant memories. But sleeping with him for his needs? I could do that. I could stay in my body while I gave him something he needed. Because I refused to take and take anymore. It wasn’t fair—especially when no one gave him anything in return.
His cool, gruff voice cut through my thoughts.
Blinking, I glanced up into serious black eyes, shuttering a past I desperately wanted to heal. “That work for you?”
I shifted on the spot, unwilling to admit I hadn’t been listening but rather daydreaming about him. About sex with him. Who would’ve thought I would be capable of such a thing?
His lips tilted into a smirk as he looked me up and down and crossed his arms. “You weren’t listening, were you?”
My cheeks warmed. “Um…” I racked my brain, trying to recall what he’d said. “Sorry.” I cowered, ready for discipline. I stepped back, rolling my shoulders, my knees already loose and ready to tumble into a bowing position even while my mind knew he’d never hit me. The muscle memory was harder to shake.
His jaw clenched, noticing my mannerisms and understanding the programming I’d undergone.
I hated that I’d made him sad, making him think I still feared him. The opposite was true. My body might still seek self-preservation by habit, but my mind knew better. “I know you won’t hit me,” I whispered. “I didn’t mean to flinch. Habit…”
“A habit you need to break,” he growled.
I nodded. “And I will.” Each day, it was getting easier to fight such instincts. I was just sorry I couldn’t stop it today. “What did you ask me?”
“Doesn’t matter. Something else more important just came up.”
“Oh?”
“I’ll be right back, gentleman.” Grabbing my elbow, he carted me away from Selix and the two managers he’d been talking to.
My heart leapt into rainbow bubbles as he guided me swiftly around the warehouse floor and into the office. “What are we—”
“Quiet.” Shoving me inside, he slammed the door shut and yanked the blinds over the window.
Instantly, worry that I’d upset him cloaked me. His face battled right and wrong. His muscles tight and bunched.
I backed up, moving toward the boardroom table. “Did I do something wrong?”
“Yes.”
“I did?” My breathing accelerated as he advanced, pushing me backward with his will power alone. “What?”