He walked up the steps and pulled me into his arms. “Then don’t make a decision now, Kass. Give your mother’s passing some time, then think about it.”
I nodded. “That might be best.” There was a part of me that didn’t want to let go, but the other part felt it’d make things easier if I did.
After dropping the boxes off at my house, we’d eaten lasagna at my favorite Italian place. It was a hole in the wall, but they had the best Italian food around. Now we were at the Ben & Jerry’s ice cream shop, the place I always found myself when I wanted to drown my sorrows. It was the same place Logan used to bring me when we were dating. For the past eight years, it had been mine, Sean, and Levi’s place.
We sat outside at one of the picnic tables, the wind blowing my hair into my face as I finished up the last of my strawberry cheesecake ice cream. It was probably one of the last cool, days of spring before the heat of summer took over.
Sean reached over and tucked my hair behind my ear. “Do you ever wonder what would’ve happened if our parents didn’t get married?”
I shrugged. “Sometimes. We had a good year together.”
He lowered his head. “Yeah, we did. I hate it had to end.”
So much had changed over the years. We’d started out as friends, then a couple years after Logan broke up with me, we became lovers. Our relationship never officially went public, so imagine our surprise when his mother and my father announced their engagement out of the blue.
I still cared about Sean, but it didn’t feel right being with him, knowing we were step-brother and sister now. That was why we’d kept our distance for a while, until things got easier.
He started dating other girls and I saw other guys, but he had a jealous streak about him. He still had feelings for me, but knew I didn’t love him like that. He was my best friend and I cared for him deeply, our connection stronger than any other relationship I’d ever had . . . except for what I thought I had with Logan.
I grabbed Sean’s hand and he lifted his head, gaze torn. Now that my father had named us co-owners of Bennett Pro Racing, we were going to be connected for a long time. “You just need to find a good girl, Sean,” I murmured.
He shook his head. “I already did. What gets me is, you’re still single too. Doesn’t that tell you something? We’ve failed at every other relationship we’ve been in.”
He had a point, but I knew what my problem was. I hadn’t let anyone completely in since Logan. “That doesn’t mean anything. We just haven’t met the right ones yet. Besides, can you imagine what our parents would say if they knew we were intimate?”
He scoffed. “Who gives a fuck? I can see it being a problem if we were kids fucking around, but we’re adults. We were together before they even started seeing each other.”
Sighing, I let his hand go. “I can’t argue with you there, but it still doesn’t change anything. We have to move on for the team’s sake. When my father retires, it’ll be me and you handling the business. That means, whatever happened in the past has to stay there. We can’t let feelings interfere.”
His jaw clenched and he looked away. “So it’s completely over then?”
I hated hurting him. He’d been by my side for years, always there when I needed him. “I’m sorry, Sean. It’s the way it has to be. Having you as my friend has been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I don’t want to lose that.”
Turning his gaze to me, he stood and held out his hand. I took it and he pulled me into his arms. “You’re not ever going to lose me, Kass. We’ve been through a lot together. If being your friend is the only way I can have you, so be it.”
“Promise?”
He chuckled and let me go. “I promise. Now let’s get back to the shop and see if we can catch Levi on the new bike.”
I loved watching the guys practice. “Sounds good.”
We got in his truck and started back toward the Bennett Pro Racing shop, which was down the street from my father’s house. Over the years, our company had grown from a small, backyard building, to a two thousand square foot garage with every amenity you could think of.
His mother, Angela Mills, had worked for DB Racing, which was owned by Donnie Baker. Donnie and my father were childhood friends, and we’d been shocked when Sean had wanted to ride for us and not him. Donnie was like family to us; we were always supporting each other.
When Sean joined our team, Angela would come around to watch him race, leading to the eventual romance between her and my dad. But that was many years ago. Since then, Sean had decided to step down from racing, leaving us with just four riders.
“Do you miss racing?” I asked, even though I knew he did. I could see it in his eyes every time we were at a race and he wasn’t out there on the track.