“Come on, admit it, boss. You love her,” Tate chimes in with his jab, bringing it three to one.
“I don’t have to admit anything.” I lie back on the bench, ignoring their snickers, and continue with my set.
“It’s always the hard ones who fall so fast.” Hart enters the gym, bringing their tally up to four.
“Who would have thought the blonde would bring him to his knees?” Fox asks as he comes to spot me.
“I knew he was a goner the moment she sent the drink back,” Tate announces.
“Boy, you didn’t know what his extracurricular activities were.” Fox snorts, dismissing Tate. “I didn’t know how far gone he was when he made me chase the punk-ass thug down two streets. It wasn’t until he wanted the reservation at Il Centro I knew he was hooked.”
“Damn… he took her to Il Centro?” Hart asks. “Shit. If I didn’t already suspect he was hooked when he started having us bust down doors to get Dominic Westin, then that info would have sealed the deal.” I finish my set and sit up, raising a brow at him. I’m not surprised Hart’s playing along, but I did expect more from him.
“I knew when you ordered our asses to the damn car wash,” Walker shouts across the gym, giving his opinion. “Then made us pay fifty dollars for a lousy detail.” I grin, realizing, yeah, I did threaten them with unfavorable consequences if they didn’t show up. Boys Haven made a pretty penny on the guys from the department who came down and made a donation.
“Fucking highway robbery is what it was,” Fox grumbles.
“Fuck you, it was for a good cause.”
“Yeah, if that’s what you’re calling it these days.” He nudges me off the bench so he can knock out his set.
“What about you, Sterling?” Hart asks.
I turn my head in his direction. “Yeah, Sterling. Seeing as though you all seem to think you have it figured out, you wanna throw in when you think I fell?” I don’t know why I’m encouraging this. Maybe it’s my way of wondering when I really did fall. If I have fallen at all.
I think I have, but how can I be sure? It’s been so long since I’ve been in this situation, my feelings are almost foreign.
“You take her out to the house yet?” He holds my stare in challenge.
The fucker has a way of messing with my head.
“No.”
“Then I’m not sold.” He shrugs like that settles it.
“What?” A collective cry rings out amongst the guys.
“I’m not saying he’s not whipped. I’m saying I don’t think it’s love.” He stands and rubs his towel over his face.
Fuck him. He’s trying to get in my head.
“Whatever you say.” I focus my attention back to my reps and ignore the niggling feeling that maybe he’s right. Maybe I need to open myself up to Liberty more.
She sure as hell has with me.
The boys continue to chat amongst themselves, ribbing Fox over his ex-wife, and Tate over a new woman he’s been seeing. We’re only halfway through, and I find Sterling’s dig has put me in a foul mood.
“Come on, boys, you all keep running your mouths, you’re not gonna like me when I run PT on Monday,” I warn them. Running PT is my favorite pastime. Making the boys run the obstacle course in full SWAT gear might be on the cards.
The gym soon quietens down. The threat of me kicking their asses in PT is enough to allow us to finish the rest of our workout in silence. It also gives me a chance to get my shit sorted.
By the time I’ve finished, showered and heading home, I’ve made a decision.
Maybe this weekend I’ll take her out, show her my house.
Maybe this weekend I’ll tell her about my dad, tell her everything.
Maybe Sterling can fuck off.
“It doesn’t have to be like this. I know you can’t see it at the moment, but we can work this out. There are other ways.” I ignore all my training and step closer. “Let me help you.” He doesn’t retreat as I take another step closer, and my chest expands in determination.
I’m almost there.
His vacant stare holds my gaze as a flicker of something passes between us.
Him understanding my fears.
Me understanding his weakness.
“Dad, NO!” I don’t recognize my voice, yet I recognize it’s too late.
“I love you, Liam, always know that.”
It happens so fast.
The change of his aim.
The discharge of his gun.
The fall of his body.
The agony of my screams.
I wake in alarm. My muscles tense in anticipation of its ending, to the outcome that I witnessed and to the nightmare I can’t stop myself from reliving.
Fuck.
It’s always the same.
A recap.
A reminder.
My reality.
“Hetch?” Liberty stirs next to me as the dream replays over and over in rapid succession.
The gun.
My screams.
The blood.
The end.
All of it smashes into me with violent force, like a battering ram used to tear through a door on a SWAT raid. Tremors rack my body while my heart slams against my chest as I force the memories back down to where they don’t hurt me.