Elle laughed. Her life in Stone Peak had become awfully complicated in a very short time. People would be talking. It was so unlike her. She spent her life trying to avoid drama. But with Gris around, it was hard to stay on the right side of things. He had a way of messing things up.
She went out into the restaurant and prayed she looked okay. Gris had rattled her, but she didn’t have to let it show.
“Forrester,” she said.
“Elle,” he said.
He was sitting at the counter and he looked even better than she remembered. She felt weak at the knees as the memory flooded back of what he’d done to her. She couldn’t believe she’d been in his bed. He was like something out of a movie, sculpted and muscular, sure of himself, confident.
“What are you doing here?” she said, stupidly. It was obvious that anyone in a diner at that time of morning was there for one thing, breakfast.
She felt a flood of surprise at his answer.
“I’m here for you, silly.”
“Me?”
“Yes you. Of course, you. You don’t spend a night like we just did, and then escape me that easily.”
Elle blushed. She knew Kelly and Grace were listening to every word.
“I thought maybe you’d have had enough of me.”
“Is that why you left?”
She nodded. She felt silly now that he was sitting right in front of her, but when she’d been in the hotel room, the thought that he might not want her had been very real.
Forrester patted the stool next to his. “Have a seat,” he said. “I need to say something to you.”
The diner was dead. She could take a break. Cautiously, she sat down next to him, wondering what he’d need to say to her at this point in their relationship. Had she screwed up already?
“You don’t have to play things cool with me, Elle. You don’t have to keep your guard up.”
“I’m not keeping my guard up.”
“Listen,” Forrester said, and he was speaking very earnestly. He put his hand on Elle’s leg and she felt electricity flow through her at his touch. She wanted his hand to slide up under her skirt and caress her.
“I’m listening,” she said.
He looked into her eyes. “I get it,” he said. “I get wanting to protect yourself. Believe me.”
And it was true. Elle didn’t know it but at that very moment, Forrester’s other hand was in his pocket, touching the envelope that contained the letter from his father. Forrester hadn’t decided it yet, but even as he spoke to Elle about needing to protect herself, he’d already decided that he wasn’t going to open the envelope. He wasn’t going to read the letter. It could potentially say something that might heal the wounds he’d suffered as a child, but it could equally say something that might break his heart, and that wasn’t a risk he could take. So he knew what he was saying to Elle when he spoke of protecting herself. Innately he understood her, and he meant every word of what he was saying.
“I know what it’s like to be let down,” he said. “I know what it’s like to be so hurt that you think your entire heart is going to just disappear, blink out, like a broken lightbulb. I know that pain, Elle. I know that fear. But I’m telling you now, I’m not going to hurt you. I’m not going to let you down. So you don’t have to keep me at a distance.”
Elle was intensely aware that she was blushing. No one had ever spoken to her like that before. No one had ever read her so clearly.
Forrester wasn’t like other people. He seemed to understand her in a way that she wasn’t even sure she understood herself.
She wanted to be sure. She wanted to know for certain that she could trust him. She wanted to know that he wasn’t going to disappear, like everyone else who’d ever meant anything in her life.
But what would she have seen?
If she’d been able to read Forrester’s mind, what would it say to her?
One thing. He wanted to make love to her again. In fact, more than that, he didn’t just want to make love to her, but he wanted to do it without a condom. He didn’t have any trouble with condoms, he wasn’t one of those guys who hated them, but he wanted things to be different with Elle. He wanted to be inside her more deeply, more intimately, than he’d ever been inside anyone. He wanted to put his seed inside her. He wanted their skin to touch. He wanted their bodies to merge. And without even realizing it yet, he wanted her to be the one who gave him a child. That’s what he wanted.
She didn’t know it yet either. All she knew was that he was sitting there, next to her, with his hand reassuringly on her knee, and that he was the most beautiful man she’d ever dreamed of.
“Okay,” she said.
“Okay?”
“I’ll try. I’ll try not to let my fears control me. I’ll try to trust you, Forrester. You just have to promise me one thing. Promise you won’t ever let me down.”
“I won’t.”
“Don’t ever let me go.”
“I promise, I won’t.”
“Don’t disappear, like my mother did.”
Chapter 21
Forrester