ALBUS: Of course.
SCORPIUS: And be my good friend.
And suddenly the SORTING HAT is center stage and we’re back in the Great Hall.
SORTING HAT:
Are you afraid of what you’ll hear?
Afraid I’ll speak the name you fear?
Not Slytherin! Not Gryffindor!
Not Hufflepuff! Not Ravenclaw!
Don’t worry, child, I know my job,
You’ll learn to laugh, if first you sob.
Lily Potter. GRYFFINDOR.
LILY: Yes!
ALBUS: Great.
SCORPIUS: Did you really think she’d come to us? Potters don’t belong in Slytherin.
ALBUS: This one does.
As he tries to melt into the background, the other students laugh. He looks up at them all.
I didn’t choose, you know that? I didn’t choose to be his son.
ACT ONE, SCENE FIVE
MINISTRY OF MAGIC, HARRY’S OFFICE
HERMIONE sits with piles of paper in front of her in HARRY’s messy office. She is slowly sorting through it all. HARRY enters in a rush. He is bleeding from a graze on his cheek.
HERMIONE: How did it go?
HARRY: It was true.
HERMIONE: Theodore Nott?
HARRY: In custody.
HERMIONE: And the Time-Turner itself?
HARRY reveals the Time-Turner. It shines out alluringly.
Is it genuine? Does it work? It’s not just an hour-reversal turner — it goes back further?
HARRY: We don’t know anything yet. I wanted to try it out there and then but wiser heads prevailed.
HERMIONE: Well, now we have it.
HARRY: And you’re sure you want to keep it?
HERMIONE: I don’t think we’ve a choice. Look at it. It’s entirely different to the Time-Turner I had.
HARRY (dry): Apparently wizardry has moved on since we were kids.
HERMIONE: You’re bleeding.
HARRY checks his face in the mirror. He dabs at the wound with his robes.
Don’t worry, it’ll go with the scar.
HARRY (with a grin): What you doing in my office, Hermione?
HERMIONE: I was anxious to hear about Theodore Nott and — thought I’d check whether you’d kept your promise and were on top of your paperwork.
HARRY: Ah. Turns out I’m not.
HERMIONE: No. You’re not. Harry, how can you get any work done in this chaos?
HARRY waves his wand and the papers and books transform into neat piles. HARRY smiles.
HARRY: No longer chaotic.
HERMIONE: But still ignored. You know, there’s some interesting stuff in here . . . There are mountain trolls riding Graphorns through Hungary, there are giants with winged tattoos on their backs walking through the Greek Seas, and the werewolves have gone entirely underground — HARRY: Great, let’s get out there. I’ll get the team together.
HERMIONE: Harry, I get it. Paperwork’s boring . . .
HARRY: Not for you.
HERMIONE: I’m busy enough with my own. These are people and beasts that fought alongside Voldemort in the great wizarding wars. These are allies of darkness. This — combined with what we have just unearthed at Theodore Nott’s — could mean something. But if the Head of Magical Law Enforcement isn’t reading his files —
HARRY: But I don’t need to read it — I’m out there, hearing about it. Theodore Nott — it was me who heard the rumors about the Time-Turner and me who acted upon it. You really don’t need to tell me off.
HERMIONE looks at HARRY — this is tricky.
HERMIONE: Do you fancy a toffee? Don’t tell Ron.
HARRY: You’re changing the subject.
HERMIONE: I truly am. Toffee?
HARRY: Can’t. We’re off sugar at the moment. (Beat.) You know, you can get addicted to that stuff?
HERMIONE: What can I say? My parents were dentists, I was bound to rebel at some point. Forty is leaving it a little late, but . . . You’ve just done a brilliant thing. You’re certainly not being told off — I just need you to look at your paperwork every now and again, that’s all. Consider this a gentle — nudge — from the Minister for Magic.
HARRY hears the implication in her emphasis, he nods.
How’s Ginny? How’s Albus?
HARRY: It seems I’m as good at fatherhood as I am at paperwork. How’s Rose? How’s Hugo?
HERMIONE (with a grin): You know, Ron says he thinks I see more of my secretary, Ethel, (she indicates off) than him. Do you think there’s a point where we made a choice — parent of the year or Ministry official of the year? Go on. Go home to your family, Harry, the Hogwarts Express is about to depart for another year — enjoy the time you’ve got left — and then come back here with a fresh head and get these files read.
HARRY: You really think this could all mean something?
HERMIONE (with a smile): It could do. But if it does, we’ll find a way to fight it, Harry. We always have.
She smiles once more, pops a toffee in her mouth, and leaves the office. HARRY is left alone. He packs his bag. He walks out of the office and down a corridor. The weight of the world upon his shoulders.
He walks, tired, into a telephone box. He dials 62442.
TELEPHONE BOX: Farewell, Harry Potter.
He ascends away from the Ministry of Magic.
ACT ONE, SCENE SIX