“Sir,” I said. “You know we’re with you, but we’re not ready to fight a war. They want to tear down a wall we can’t even see and unleash an army we can’t begin to imagine. We’re not ready for any of this.”
“They killed Eleanor because she stood against them. They killed Howard Carson. Lawrence Hoole. Nellie Fuller.” He looked up at Jenny. “Jenny Cavanaugh. How many countless others? Good people have lost their lives every time they’ve risen up against the Dire Council’s villainy. I will not let those losses be in vain, nor will I stand idly by while countless others meet the same fate. We don’t know how long our window will last, and we cannot give him time to rally. He could be at our doorstep before we know it.”
“Well then,” I said, summoning the strength to stand up without wobbling. “Let’s go save the world.”
SUPPLEMENTAL MATERIAL
It was well after midnight when Jackaby passed by my room. He paused in the hallway before doubling back to poke his head through my open door.
“You haven’t slept,” he said.
“No, sir. Not yet.” I sat up, hugging the blankets around myself. My stomach was a tightening knot. “I—I’m—” I sighed.
“You’re what?” Jackaby stepped inside.
“I’m—” I took a deep breath. I didn’t want to say it out loud. Saying it out loud somehow made it true. I dropped my head, letting the words fall in sheepish whispers on the blanket. “I’m afraid.”
“Of course you are,” said Jackaby flatly. “You’re intelligent and you’re aware. Why shouldn’t you be afraid?”
“That’s very reassuring, sir. Thank you,” I said. “Are you afraid?”
“Constantly,” he said. “It’s the reason I’m still alive. Fear keeps us sharp. Listen to your fear.”
“And what if my fear tells me—what if it tells me I should run away?” I asked.
Jackaby leaned against the battered old dresser and regarded me with a bemused smile. “Then you should probably run away. I told you as much when I hired you. This line of work comes with heavy risks.”
“Why haven’t you run?” I asked.
His smile faltered and he swallowed. “I ran once,” he said. “In a way, I haven’t stopped.” He crossed the room in silence before dropping into a threadbare armchair in the corner.
“What did you run from?” I asked.
He raised an eyebrow at me but did not reply.
“It’s hard to imagine,” I said. “What could scare a man who fights monsters?”
His expression hardened. “Being a man who doesn’t.” He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the chair-back. “Being a man who lets the monsters win. I’ve been running from that for a very long time.”
I nodded, not knowing what else to say. The clock in the hallway ticked out a stoic rhythm that echoed through the house for several beats. Jackaby broke the silence at last.
“Have I told you the story of the two pennies?” he asked.
I shook my head. “Another folktale?”
“A memory,” he said. “I met a man that day.”
“Which day?” I asked.
“The day I ran. The sight was still so new to me then, and I had so much to learn. I was a rudderless boy with the weight of the world on my unready shoulders. I didn’t know where I was going, just that I needed to be gone.
“I walked for hours before reaching the nearest town, which is where I met the man. He wore stained overalls and a faded cap. His hair was gray, and his moustache bushy. He had a muddy cart at his side and a long-handled brush in his hands—he was a simple workman, cleaning a fountain in the town square. I don’t know why, but I stopped to watch him. There was something calming about the way he worked.
“The workman was just packing up when a married couple passed by with a little girl in tow. The old workman set his brush aside and greeted them with a kindly smile. He showed the child a penny he had fished out of the fountain. He told her an impromptu story about wishing wells and lucky coins. I listened from my bench. The girl’s parents seemed to find the man charming. The girl was riveted. The story was a lot of nonsense.
“When he was done, he handed the coin to the girl. She closed her eyes solemnly and tossed it into the water. The old man tipped his cap, and the family went happily on their way.
“I watched them as they walked off down the lane. I had seen the coin. It was a penny. Unexceptional. No aura, no halo, no magic. And yet—
“Impossibly, the girl was changed by the experience. There was a new glow around her. I could see it as plainly as you can see the glow of a candle. It was a blue aura, but a warm blue. It was as though she had been charmed, and I suppose she had been. I would wager anything that little girl got her wish after all.
“The workman was looking right at me when I turned back. He gestured for me to come forward, so I climbed down from my bench and approached him nervously. He hung his rag on the cart and merrily pressed a second salvaged coin into my palm.
“It was a penny, just like the first. Just like countless others. A scuffed Indian Head. Brown. Small. It might have been the least special penny ever minted. The man told me to make a wish. I smiled warily and tossed the thing into the fountain.”
“What did you wish for?” I asked.
“Nothing,” Jackaby said, rubbing his neck. “My life as I knew it was over. I was alone. I was afraid. I wanted nothing that a wet penny could give me. The nice man patted my arm and pushed his cart away down the cobblestones. I watched my penny sink to the bottom of the fountain. That’s when I saw it.”
“Saw what?”
“The first penny, the little girl’s. It was glowing blue, but a warm blue, just like the girl’s aura—a hopeful blue. My own coin came to rest beside it, brown and lusterless. Her coin had been as dull as mine, but the wish had changed it. It was now shining with a raw and radiant optimism—a lucky penny, indeed.”
“Missed opportunity, then,” I said. “The man’s story was real, after all. You should have made a wish.”
Jackaby opened his eyes, and a smile gently returned to his cheeks. “I did not need the wish so much as I needed the lesson,” he said. “I learned what I needed to learn. I learned that we make our own luck, Miss Rook. It wasn’t the coin. It was finding something to believe in. There is real power in that.”
“I like that,” I said. “So, what have you found to believe in, sir?”
Jackaby looked at me for a long time. His storm gray eyes bore into mine, but his expression was curiously gentle. At length he rose to his feet. “Good night, Miss Rook,” he said. “Until tomorrow comes.”
In another moment Jackaby would be out the door. Soon I would hear his feet pad down the carpet, hear his door click shut at the end of the hall. For that instant, though, I felt a curious sensation ripple over me. I felt the knot of fear inside me loosen. I felt as though if I looked down I might see myself aglow—blue, perhaps, but a warm blue, a hopeful blue.
“Good night, Mr. Jackaby,” I said. “Until tomorrow comes.”