“Only in the dark,” she confesses. It’s the first real statement she’s made while looking directly at me. Raw and honest.
My other hand lifts to her arm and I trail a featherlight touch down her bare arm. When goosebumps rise on her skin I can’t help smiling. I know she wants me because it’s written all over her face. “Do you want to take the lead?” I question softly.
“I don’t know how to do this.”
We stare at each other for a few moments and I take in the innocence that’s so clear in her features.
“Do what feels natural. But let me warn you, this is the one and only time I’ll allow you to be in control. Normally, I’ll be in charge, and you’ll love every fu*king moment,” I warn her with a feral grunt.
She lifts her chin and I love the cheekiness I see on her face. “Then do it.”
The fear I saw earlier is gone and I realize this is my moment. She’s allowing me in. A sneak peek behind her high walls and I’d be stupid if I didn’t take it. I take a gulp of wine and turn to her. Gripping her hair at the nape of her neck, I pull her body against mine, then without warning my mouth crashes down on hers and we share the chilled Chardonnay while our tongues fight in a sexually charged dance that has me wanting to have our bodies connected in more places than just our mouths.
Her body becomes pliable, molding to mine, and I swallow the whimpers from her, reveling in her taste. She’s more potent than any drug. She’s more intoxicating than any alcohol, and I’m addicted.
Our moment is broken when the waitress brings our food. Placing each of the plates on the table, she moves away and the hostess enters the private dining area.
“Mr. Hamilton, I apologize for the intrusion, but I have something for your guest.” She hands Ella a small silver envelope and box.
Once we’re alone, I’m intrigued as I watch a myriad of emotions flit over my girl’s face.
I watch Ella open it and pull out a single card, also silver, with a large white snowflake on the front. Her worried gaze darts to me, and there’s emotion stronger than fear running through them. There’s revulsion, horror, and panic.
“Is this your idea of a joke?” She tears the card, but all I can do is frown.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Ella. I didn’t send it.”
We stare at each other and I hope she can see the truth in my eyes, because I have no idea what that meant to her, but whatever it is, she’s got pure agony on her face. She rips the box open and inside there’s a small winter snow globe. I remember Kat used to have them as a girl. They were her favorite ornaments.
“It’s… The card… You didn’t…”
“No, I didn’t. What’s got you so worked up, baby?”
Shaking her head, she pushes up from the table and rushes toward the restroom. My body is vibrating with fear and confusion. Without thinking I follow her. As soon as I push the door open I find her huddled over in a corner. Her face is streaked with tears.
She’s fragile. Delicate. Broken. A flower about to lose its petals.
“Go away, please. Just leave me,” she begs me, but I can’t bring myself to walk out. Kneeling before her, I place a hand on her knee.
“I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here for you. Talk to me, Ella.” Her tears flow freely and the well put together woman falling apart in front of me is a scared little girl and the only thing I want to do is hold her. “Can I touch you?”
She nods and I scoot closer, pulling her into my arms. I cocoon her body with mine.
“He’s here. I need to go home. He’s here.” Her words are ragged, as if she’s swallowed a cupful of sand and what it does to my heart is concerning. It’s never been an issue. I’ve kept it far away from affection, but with her, Ella Carmel, I want to give it all to her. She’s going to be my downfall, and I’d gladly take the leap.
“Who, baby? Who’s here?” Her gaze meets mine, glistening with emotion. Tears stream down her cheeks and she shakes her head.
“Him. He’s found me.”
Ella
Carter stares at me for so long I think he hasn’t heard me, but then he nods. Pulling me up, he wraps his arms around me and practically carries me out of the restroom. “Where are… where are we going?” My voice is croaky at best and he halts, staring at me.
“I’m taking you home and you’re going to tell me exactly what the hell is going on. No more secrets. No more lies.” His voice is adamant as we pass the hostess where he offers her a curt nod and we hasten our way down to the waiting car.
Cold settles heavily in my bones. “Carter, please,” I beg, but I don’t know what I’m asking for. He startles me when his eyes meet mine. There’s fear and concern floating in them.
“I’m taking you home. I need to make a quick appearance at my father’s event, but Bennett will stay with you while I’m gone. You’re not to be alone. Okay?”
I can’t argue with that. As Baines drives through London streets taking me home, I can’t help the sinking feeling that my past is catching up to me.
I’ve let down my guard. I’ve allowed a man inside my mind, and if I’m honest I like it. Carter gives me a sense of safety in his dominance, but also it’s as if he heals me. Like he’s taking every broken piece of the girl I once was and molding her into a woman. Where desire and need isn’t something to be feared but embraced.
“Come,” he murmurs and I realize I’ve lost time because we’re outside my apartment building. He helps me out of the car, my knees still wobbly from the shock and fear that wracked my body. When Carter’s gaze lands on mine, it’s as if he’s looking into my soul, finding all the ugly parts, dragging them to the surface, only to cleanse me. “You’re safe, baby. I swear to you,” he promises, scooping me up and carrying me bridal style into the lobby.
At the elevators, he leans in and I push the button.
Everything is done in silence. Wordless understanding.
There’s no need to vocalize anything because this man knows me. It should scare me, but I feel at ease. Our ride up to the seventh floor calms me somewhat and when we’re deposited in my hallway, I’m shocked to find Bennett dressed in a suit and tie, looking dashing leaning against my doorjamb.
“What took you two so long?” He smirks, his eyes darkened resembling a mossy field glistening with mischief, but the concern hangs around us like a flightless balloon.
“It was ten goddamn minutes, Bennett.”
All Carter gets is a chuckle, as I unlock the door and step inside. The apartment is quiet and dark. Flicking the switch beside the door, the living room illuminates with a dim light and we all shuffle into the open area. “Look, I’ll be okay. I really don’t—”
“You’re not staying alone, Ella. That’s final. No arguments.” Bennett’s not taking no for an answer, so I relent. I don’t want to fight or argue. All I need is my medication and sleep.