Van Dean must’ve read my confusion, because he explained.
“The subconscious is an extremely complex environment, Lily. It’s the well of our creativity as humans, and the source of our imagination, but it also provides the highway for our connection to the divine. What we’ve discovered in researching past lives is that the former souls come in through the subconscious, but sometimes they can pick up a little litter along the way. At times, there’s a mix of both the creative and inventive parts of our subconscious, and the more pure communications from previous souls. The more you tap into that highway, the more likely you are to pollute the information coming from the source—in this case, whatever Amber might have to say. And while I believe that your first hypnotic session was relatively litter-free, if you will, any subsequent session would likely be a blend of both your imagination and any attempt that Amber may have to communicate with you.”
“This is all so cool,” I heard Cole whisper. And while I appreciated that he thought the situation was fascinating, I was the one struggling with nightmares every single night.
I sighed tiredly and glanced at Mom. She looked concerned. “Do you have any other suggestions for my daughter?”
“Yes,” he said, leaning forward to rest his hands on the desk. “First, Lily, I want you to know that much of what’s happening to you right now with the appearance of Amber may be caused by the stresses you’ve been facing in your own life. Your parents’ divorce, the uncertainty of a new school environment and trying to make friends there, living with your grandmother and all the pressures that come with the Bennett name in a town like Fredericksburg. So, I would advise you to seek counseling solely based on the changes you’ve been facing of late. I’d like you to go back to see Dr. White, or whomever you’re comfortable with, to talk only about the challenges in your life right now. I don’t know that you’ll want to bring up Amber Greeley to anyone but me or Dr. White, however, because I’m not sure that another therapist would have the pragmatic understanding of how that is affecting you without jumping to other conclusions.”
In other words, he didn’t want me to mention that I might be the reincarnated soul of Amber Greeley to anyone else who might think I was cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.
“That also goes for extended family and friends,” he added gently.
I nodded. I could just imagine my grandmother’s reaction to this, not to mention the freak-out my dad would have if he knew.
“Weekly counseling might ease your anxiety, Lily,” Dr. Van Dean said. “And in turn, that might cause Amber to relax as well. As I said, she seems to be most insistent in making herself known right now. True, your move to Fredericksburg could have been the trigger, but I suspect it’s also because, at the end of her life, there was a great deal of anxiety and upheaval. She may be reaching out to you because she feels that anxiety mirrored in you.”
“Okay,” I said. “That makes sense.”
“Excellent.” Dr. Van Dean rose to his feet, and the rest of us stood up, too. He surprised me then by taking my hand and saying, “As I suggested, start off by visiting Amber Greeley’s grave. Take her some flowers. Show her that you honor her, and perhaps that will be the end of the disruptions she’s bringing to your sleep. If not, come back to me in two weeks, and in the meantime, think about seeing a therapist to talk about the challenges currently affecting you.”
Turning to Cole, he added, “And as for you, young man, I would very much like to talk to you again, too. Would you consider coming back to discuss your uncle?”
“Sure,” Cole said, and I could see that he was excited by the idea.
It so surprised me how cool he was with this whole concept of reincarnation. Tanner would’ve laughed at the idea, and then he likely would’ve openly challenged Dr. Van Dean. My ex was like that: always ready to challenge authority and people who had ideas in contrast to his own. It occurred to me that he’d been an arrogant prick and a bully, and I suddenly wondered what the hell I’d been thinking while I’d been dating him. How could I have been heartbroken over an asshole like Tanner?
The drive home was a lot less awkward as my mom decided to try for a normal conversation.
“What does your mom do, Cole?” she asked.
“She’s an RN at Robinwoods Clinic.”
Mom turned slightly to look back at Cole. “Your mom’s not Stacey Drepeau, is she?”
“Yeah,” Cole said. “You know her?”
“I not only know her, I worked with her two days ago! We have to spend a few hours at an off-site facility each week, and Wednesday was my day at the clinic.”
“Cool,” Cole said.