Cole cocked his head again curiously, but he didn’t hesitate to put in the earbuds and press PLAY.
I waited anxiously as he watched the recording. I kept trying to read his facial expression, to brace myself for that moment that he threw off the earbuds and told me I was nuts. Worse, what if he didn’t say anything at all? I could just imagine the terrible scenario where he’d avoid making eye contact with me at school, and what if he told everybody else what I’d confessed to him here? What if everyone ultimately thought I was the crazy new girl?
All of these thoughts swirled round and round in my mind as Cole stayed riveted to the screen. At last he sat back in his chair, and pulled out the earbuds. “Whoa,” he said.
I dropped my gaze to my lap again. What did that even mean? “Pretty freaky, huh?” I said, forcing myself to look up at him again. “He thinks I might be Amber…reincarnated.”
Cole pushed a hand through his hair. “This is so crazy,” he whispered.
I nodded, my gaze returning to my lap. It was crazy. It totally was. It was also overwhelming and scary and, well, big. “I think that’s why I called you Spence the first time I met you,” I confessed. “I think that ever since I moved back to Fredericksburg, Amber has been creeping into my mind. You look a lot like the boy in the field from my dream.”
“That’s why you drove us to my grandma’s house?” he said. “You were going to Spence’s?”
I risked looking up again. His question gave me a little hope that maybe he believed me, or that he was at least open to the idea. “I think so,” I said. “I mean, I was just driving, I wasn’t even thinking at the time. The route felt like something I’d driven before, and it wasn’t until you asked me how I’d gotten us there that I realized I’d never actually been to that house in my life.
“And I know I probably shouldn’t believe in something like this, Cole, but what other explanation could there be that isn’t also just as insane?”
He seemed to study me critically. “I can’t think of one,” he admitted.
I nodded and looked away again. It all made me feel so weird, so separate, and yet, there was a tiny part of me that accepted the concept and was even relieved to have some kind of an explanation for the dreams and the déjà vu. “Mom and I are going to see an expert in reincarnation today,” I told him once I’d gathered the courage to look at him again. Cole’s brow furrowed and I rushed to tell him about Dr. Van Dean.
After I was done, Cole wadded up his napkin and turned in his chair to get our waitress’s attention. When she came over he asked her for two boxes and the check. A bitter hurt hit me in the solar plexus. He didn’t believe me, and he couldn’t even stand to finish his meal in my company.
But then Cole fished into his wallet to pull out some bills and said, “Would you be willing to come to my house and look at something?”
“What?” I asked, warily.
Leaning in to whisper he said, “It’s something nobody else knows about, but I think you should see it.”
I started to get nervous. What was his intention? “I have to meet my mom soon,” I said.
Cole handed me one of the boxes the waitress had brought and said, “It won’t take long. Please, Lily? I think it’s something that could help.”
I didn’t know what Cole had in mind, but nothing about his manner seemed like he was trying to trick me, so I put the rest of my lunch in the box and followed him out the door.
We didn’t talk much on the way to his house. I was mostly consumed with thoughts about what he might be thinking. I wanted to ask him if he thought I was crazy, but I didn’t know if I could keep my emotions in check if he said yes.
We arrived at his home about ten minutes later. It was a low ranch, painted dark brown with light tan accents. He parked his Mustang to the far right of the attached garage, and I followed him inside.
Cole led me through the side entrance and into the kitchen, which was bright white with black granite countertops and chrome fixtures. It was pleasant and clean. A soft wuff greeted us as we came into the kitchen, and after setting my leftovers on the counter, I heard the click of dog’s paws against wood floors. Into the kitchen trotted a gorgeous golden retriever.
Dropping to one knee as the pup approached, I put a hand on her head and said, “Hey, Bailey!”
In another one of those jarring déjà vu moments, I realized Cole had never told me he had a dog, or her name.
Looking up, I took in his shocked expression. “How did you…?” he asked, pointing to the dog.
I shook my head. “I don’t know,” I told him. “I swear. I don’t know.”
“CAN YOU GUESS WHERE YOU ARE?” Spence asked.
I laughed nervously as he led me, blindfolded, through a narrow corridor where I bumped into a wall to my right. “No clue,” I said.
“Oh, come on, Ambi, you gotta have some idea.”